Brian's put out to pasture and Alice is just put out.

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In which Brian gets desperate, and there are near death experiences for Bartleby and Alan

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We wonder how Ambridge has produced so many over-protective parents, cringe at Paul, marvel at a medieval village being built in two days and enjoy our listeners' Martin/Krusty prediction....

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Brian tries to get rid of Kate, David tries to get rid of Stella and Kate tries to get rid of Amber. It's all go on The Archers this week....

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Harriet's back but her wifi isn't, Pat's losing it and we have many, many pessimistic listener predictions. Plus back to school advice from the parents of Ambridge on BBC Radio Borsetshire.

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Cockamamie predictions abound and we wonder why it didn't occur to anyone that cold water swimming might not be Fallon's ideal pastime....

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Lyndybottom upsets Robert and will Tracey and Jazzer regret their kind offer?

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Kate steamrollers Krusty, and could we be looking at Strewth?

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Brian throws his toys, Susan's clambering over hills of beans and Chris has the patience of a saint

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With new improved sound! "Don't panic!" Kenton becomes Corporal Jones, we wonder where Lynda's gratitude is and the risks of the Rosieeeeee relationship for Stella.

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Neil goes full on Bruce Willis, Susan breaks our hearts and Martyn Gibson hasn't dressed for a party since 1979.

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Eddie becomes a consumer champion and poor Tortoise bears the brunt.

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What's Annabel Shrivener up to, why didn't Clarrie stand up for Neil and the wonder of school dinner ladies.

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Happy birthday to us, Amber helps the Grundies pull together and would you ask your uncle for advice if you were having relationship problems?

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Pip is in denial and Stella's in a fit of fury

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A farewell to Peggy and a new arrival is announced #TheArchers

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Tony has a tantrum, Susan has a screwdriver and Fallon finds freedom #TheArchers

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Village shops, dating apps, anxious middle class parents and Jeff imagines bowling with Mother Teresa.

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Jeff has Dane lined up for Helen, Lucy has the sack lined up for Zainab and we wonder who's going to emerge alive from this extended family holiday.

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Let's all pretend we're thrilled about inheriting £300, and the cracks are beginning to show at Beechwood.....

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