Gemini is here and bringing the energy of self-expression, playfulness, evolution without the pressure to define oneself, and trusting your voice.
Today I share my experience learning how to let go of old identities and rigid philosophies and expectations of myself, and how to embrace curiosity, an adaptable sense of identity, and self-definition instead of being defined by the beliefs held by my family, romantic partners, jobs, and religion. It’s about the courage to define myself and express who I am even as I continue to change and explore new truths.
For the astrology-curious, we deep dive these themes through my North/South Node evolutionary path and I help you explore your own path using your natal astrology chart. I have North Node in Gemini in the 1st house and South Node in Sagittarius in the 7th house :)
The app I mention is Astrology Master.
I also share a 2-card mini reading for the energy we’re invited by the universe to embrace so that we can fully own our voice, and what we need to let go of.
Enjoy x
Hi hi! I’ve realised that when my tank is beyond empty and I’m teetering close to shut down, more intense - and less conventional - self- methods are needed to truly regulate my system and nourish me back to life.
I realised that so many of us limit self care to physical practices hoping they will automatically replenish our hearts and minds as well.
But what we need to do is take a targeted approach to each aspect of ourselves - mental activities for an overstimulated mind, energy practices for an overwhelmed aura (especially if you’re an empathetic or highly sensitive person!), emotional nourishment if our heart is sore or drained, and physical practices that are customised to what works for our unique bodies.
Join me as I use Human Design and spiritual insight to craft a personalised self-care regimen for myself following a 2-day leadership training I led last week that involved lots of late nights, 1x1 coaching and holding space for a big group of leaders.
Some atypical practices I share that do wonders for me are changing up my environment and going to hang out in a space that feels calming and peaceful for me (others might feel energised in active places), buying something luxurious, not hanging out with anyone, talking it out by recording this podcast episode to release trapped mental energy, and several more customised practices that instantly settle me down and fill me up.
Hope it helps you too! Enjoy x
I have endometriosis and it’s been the single biggest challenge I’ve experienced in my life. But it’s taught me how to stop trying to control and change my body, and how to be in healthier relationship with it. It’s also brought me into deeper spiritual reverence for the wonder that is the human body’s ability to survive and be steadfastly committed to the soul’s purpose. And most recently, it’s revealing a major past life karmic lesson I have to heal about disempowerment and a sacrificial lamb relationship I’ve had with my growth path and ability to choose the life I want to life.
Listen to my story and explore where in your life you might be ready to let go of familiar pain that no longer serves you.
Themes: Psychosomatic healing, past lives, self-acceptance, empowerment, manifestation, chronic illness, spirituality
In this episode I’m waxing lyrical about the nature of truth and whether it serves us to try make truth absolute. I believe that this is something we do to try cope with reality and to try to feel safe. But the need for right and wrong, black and white, truth and lies, and absolute knowing and certainty limits us. It only separates us from others, makes us struggle to accept reality, makes us make premature declarations of knowing when we have no clue at all, makes us more likely to make mistakes, keeps us small, and makes us gate keep knowledge and wisdom to horde power and resources.
It just increases our suffering.
What I hope for as individuals and mankind at large is that we can let go a little of needing to know with certainty and needing to be right. May we learn to hold the discomfort of not knowing and of multiple things being true at once so that we can transcend both the conflict that society has descended into and the separation that infects our relationships and inner union.
This is what brings true freedom.
PS: This episode was in the backlog - it was recorded at the beginning of February when the year felt fresh, hence the “New Year” check in :)
PPS: I kept mixing up Human Design Gate 63 and 64. Brain fog during to ovulation plus being in the middle of an inflammation flare… Gate 63 is the Gate of Doubt - it’s an energy that seeks to push the logic and understand patterns and then correct the patterns that aren’t working or are compromising our safety. It asks: Is this true? Gate 64 is the Gate of Confusion - it’s an energy that constantly wants to analyse the past and understand what it meant so we can learn from it - it holds the gift of being able to wade through confusion and handle the pressure of not knowing. It asks: What does this mean?
Themes: Fear of the unknown, the nature of truth, letting go of control, multi-dimensionality, transcendence, spiritual awakening, the meaning of life, trusting time
In today’s conversation I share the culmination of 5 years of discovering and beginning to overcome my unconscious emotional avoidance one failed relationship at a time. I explore the origins of emotional avoidance, including parentification, unhealed childhood wounds, good-girl conditioning and attachment styles. I discuss unravelling repeating dating patterns and mistakes, deciding enough was enough, and finally becoming willing to be seen and loved as an imperfect woman with healthy needs worth meeting and not as the impervious Florence Nightingale one-dimensional archetype that I people-pleased and parentified myself into in order to avoid punishment and rejection.
Phew, that was a long-ass sentence! Let’s dive in.
P.S. After recording this episode, I woke up at 2am compelled to research codependency and realised it encapsulates everything I was talking about in this episode! It also explains the relational fallout I discussed in the previous episode.
Here’s an awesome article you can read to learn more about codependency.
Themes: Childhood trauma, attachment styles, breaking unhealthy dating patterns, emotional avoidance, relational healing
A little update on my life turned into a reflection on recent platonic relationship endings that have rocked my world and made my world the last few months. I achieved something I never would have been able to had I not stood for myself and found my voice in some of my closest relationships.
But it took time for things to unwind and for me to accept the relationships had to end, so of course they were ripped out of my bloody hands when I finally reached my limit and said No. It’s ok for things to take time and we must allow our process to unwind in its own way without judgement.
I also explore how my Human Design explains my conflict resolution style and has helped me to find deeper self-acceptance and work with my style to get aligned outcomes. It will also show you where you can look in your chart for yours.
PS. After recording this episode, I woke up at 2am compelled to research codependency and realised it encapsulates much of what I was talking about in this episode! It also explains the romantic relationship lessons I discuss in the next episode.
Here’s an awesome article you can read to learn more about codependency.
Themes: Conflict resolution, relationship endings, human design
How do you move on from the loss you never thought you could survive? How do you make sense of it? When your very foundation is obliterated, how do you find new ground? How do you believe that love is safe and become willing to let joy in again when it feels like it is that very love that caused you so much pain?
Not having the answers to these questions and the fear that extreme loss will destroy us makes us try to avoid grief at all costs or bypass it by trying to process it as fast as possible. But this only keeps us small and blocks us from learning what it’s here to teach us and arriving at its greatest gift – pure love and expansive joy.
Join me as I share my journey through the most devastating 4 years of my life (loss of my long term health, my father, 3 extremely close relationships from childhood, my career, financial security and my ability to work) and the lessons that led me, miraculously, to the other side.
** Here’s a link to an image of the Star Ancestor card by Kyle Gray that I share in the card reading at the end of the episode.
Themes: Grief, death of a loved one, chronic illness, relationship endings, surrender, trust, abundance, clawing your way back after loss
** PS: As a spirit gift to you all I’m giving away a free 75-minute oracle card reading to 5 people. This is an amazing way to get guidance from your guides, learn 2024’s lessons, or call in something you are trying to manifest. DM me on IG or send me an email on www.tenjimoyana.com/book **
Say it with me: Oracle cards and tarot are not evil. Lol!
For real though, when I was a Christian and for a long time after, I was convinced they were a tool of the Devil used to derail and cast spells of misfortune over my life! It was terrifying.
I have since learned through research and my own experience that they are not – they are merely a tool for receiving guidance and wisdom from whatever deity/greater force you believe in. They are powered by the intention and energetic frequency of the user and will support and empower whatever they believe in. Plus, if you actually work with them, you see that most of them carry wonderfully high vibrational energy and card descriptions.
If you’re feeling drawn to this tool, this episode is a powerhouse of information on: my story, how cards have helped me, how you can bring them into your practice, how to find and bond with your first deck, how to give yourself your first reading, example questions you can ask, how to interpret your cards and some pitfalls to avoid (e.g., predictions and manipulating others). Let’s dive in!
** PS: As a spirit gift to y’all I’m giving away a free 75-minute oracle card reading to 5 people. DM me on IG or send me an email on www.tenjimoyana.com/book **
Themes: Oracle cards, tarot, spiritual practice, spiritual tools, trusting intuition, spirit guides, self-stewardship
Do you believe you live in a hostile universe or a benevolent one?
Trusting life is so hard when you’ve experienced a lot of loss, pain, insecurity and disappointment. But I’ve discovered that repairing our life wound is essential in our spiritual and personal development journeys if we are to become who our souls came here to become, or if we finally want to experience peace and a holding, sense of security and aliveness unlike any we have ever known. The unexpected thing I’ve also learned as a result is that when we finally trust life, life trusts us back and it’s so beautiful.
Stay tuned to the end for an unexpected channelled message to you from life ✨❤️
Themes: Trust, letting go, trauma, the spiritual path, past lives, personal development
** PS: I’m soft launching 75-minute oracle card readings. I’ve been doing them for friends for years and I feel led to offer them more widely. They’re at a very low fee right now and you can book one by DM’ing me on IG or sending me an email at www.tenjimoyana.com/book **
Guys, I’m a hun who has experienced a lot of pain in life. Death, sorrow, suicidality. Heartbreak, burnout, bullying as a teen. Chronic illness, financial loss, loss of purpose. SO many things. And it all made me generally run sad, pessimistic, and anxious. But I’ve done A LOT of healing work on myself and I feel capable of facing anything life throws my way. I feel secure in my heart and spirit. I feel big and expansive and open and trusting of life and the love I have found in my life. I think it’s time to let go of running sad and wearing my survival on the surface of my skin, and time to run happy and optimistic, or at the very least temperate. When you’ve been sad for most of your life, you have to deliberately choose and teach yourself how to be happy. I’m ready to start 😊. For anyone who’s also had tough times in life, this one is for you xx
Themes: Complex PTSD, trauma, depression, healing, letting go, emotional regulation, nervous system regulation, mindset management
So, what do you do when you’ve built the wrong life? So much happens to us in life that changes who we are – we heal our hearts and past trauma, our values change, we settle into more of ourselves – truer versions of ourselves, we grow up, life happens to us and changes our priorities, and suddenly the life we built, that was once perfect, just no longer serves us anymore.
And we suddenly feel stuck in a life – a career, job, lifestyle, friendships, a neighbourhood, financial obligations, a religion, a relationship, etc – that just doesn’t fit anymore. I have found myself here – 20 years since I left my parents’ house and started building a life of my own, and so much of it no longer feels right.
How do we unstack and rebuild lives that feel truer to us, look more like who we’ve become and integrate the new parts of ourselves (without throwing away the good parts) so that we can feel free, abundant, and right again?
Themes: career pivots, people-pleasing, parental expectations, balancing masculine and feminine energy, survival-mode, chronic illness, human design, purpose, self-acceptance
I’ve had to learn to let go of the illusion of perfection that I spent my whole life chasing. Forgiving myself for not always getting it right and not being amazing. Forgiving life for not being amazing to me and what I always dreamed it would be. And forgiving other people for just being human and colliding into me in ways that really hurt me. We’re all doing our best and life is what it is. I just want to be more loving towards myself and people by not holding us to an impossible bar that we’ll never meet. We find more peace and room for connection when we can approach ourselves and others with this level of empathy and acceptance.
Also, introducing rapid fire questions! In the style of the Abundant Leaders with Tenji Moyana Podcast, I’ve brought these fun questions across to ALIVE to help you get to know me better and maybe you can answer these questions yourself and get to know yourself better 😊.
Plus I’d love to hear your answers to the rapid fire questions 😊 comment your answer below in the Instagram or Spotify comments:
1. What superpower do you wish you had?
2. What was your favourite escape as a child?
Catch you next time 😊
P.S. Do you want to join me for an easy chat on the pod to discuss anything on your mind and or a topic I’ve covered? DM me on Instagram @tenjiwe
Themes: Self-acceptance, forgiveness, realistic expectations, empathy, self-love, relationships
Most of society assumes that everyone should want to get married. It’s seen as the end goal of every successful woman’s life, and the obvious culmination of any happy relationship. But why are we really getting married?
Today I’m sipping bubbles and snacking on nibbles with my friend Lee Nguni! Lee shares my view that we – especially women – should only get married if it makes sense for US.
We chat about her relationship journey, finding love after divorce, choosing for now not to get married to her partner of 7 years, what we see in other married relationships that makes us sceptical about whether marriage is a place where you can find happiness or peace.
We’re busting myths about what it really means to be happy, the role marriage should or shouldn’t play in that, expanding models of romantic commitment, the need for self-awareness in dating, finding deep intimacy outside of romantic relationship – and so much more.
Join us on video or audio.
I’m so curious about your perspective. What choice have you made about marriage? Tell us in the Spotify poll or Q&A or send me a Spotify voice note: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/tenji-moyana/message
Themes: Marriage, relationships, challenging stereotypes, patriarchy, non-romantic intimacy, self-awareness, self-love
Video episode. I have found that trying to love unconditionally has kept me in unbalanced relationships for way longer than I should have been because I was focussing so much on how I was loving the other person and not enough on how I was being loved.
Has this happened to you?
I’ve been finding that a more supportive definition for me is “complete love” not “unconditional love” – which means loving myself as much as I love the other person.
Then I can say are we both being loved completely? Is there balance here? Is what is flowing towards me contributing with what is flowing from me so that our relationship can be complete, i.e., nourished and sustainable?
It’s really releasing me from unhealthy dynamics and love poverty and I hope this episode brings the same for you.
Do you have a question or topic you’d like me to cover? Share in the IG comments or Spotify Q&A or send me a Spotify voice note: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/tenji-moyana/message
Themes: Love, relationships, healthy boundaries, give and take in relationships, realistic expectations of love, personal growth
We’re doing something different today! A listener sent in a question asking for advice as she navigates a long period of waiting for a breakthrough in her career. She’s trusting the process and feels comfortable with her pace of getting active in the job market after a long period of downtime but worries she’s moving slower than everyone else – is something wrong? It doesn’t help that she’s getting pressure from family, too. I share insights from my own journey with learning how to trust my pace, moving with the natural seasons of life, trusting that in the stillness a lot is still happening beneath the surface and learning how to have constructive conversations with family who may not understand your process. I also drop in some Human Design tips – knowing how I naturally navigate change and difficult moments has been a huge gift for me in times like these. Do you have a question or topic you’d like me to cover? Share in the IG comments or Spotify Q&A or send me a Spotify voice note 😊 Spotify voice note: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/tenji-moyana/message
*Correction: The human design planets that constitute your incarnation cross are your conscious and unconscious Sun and Earth. Gate 63 is my conscious Sun and Gate 64 is my conscious Earth.
There are three things you need to know about me.
1: I have been working my whole life. 2: I hate the topic of “manifestation”. 3: I’m done with being a “good girl”.
About number 1:
Believing that I have to work hard for anything good in my life has left me exhausted and resentful and, as I have discovered, completely out of alignment with the fact that life is abundant and contains more than enough of all that we need. That we don’t earn good things because that would make good things a salary for our efforts. And that’s certainly wrong.
About number 2:
I’ve hated manifestation all my life because I always wondered why other people seemed to do it so easily and I was mysteriously incapable or unworthy of manifesting. I finally know what I’ve been misunderstanding about manifestation and I’m telling you all about it today.
About number 3:
Being so focussed on being a good girl and wanting everyone to feel good around me has blocked me from being myself and thus manifesting a life and relationships that are true to who I actually am vs. Nice Tenji’s performance.
Let’s talk. This is a juicy one.
What experience have you had with manifestation? Share in the IG comments or Spotify Q&A or send me a Spotify voice note 😊
Spotify voice note: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/tenji-moyana/message
How do we awaken to the truth of who we are as souls? How do we discover, accept, and lean into our power so that it can transform our lives? What does it mean to have a spiritual awakening? What does it look and feel like? What is its purpose, anyway? What does it mean to become one with the Universe and all it is and to birth new realities from that infinite power? How do we use it to manifest truer lives? And how do we survive how crazy, painful, exhausting and quite frankly terrifying spiritual awakenings can feel?
All this plus a view into the spiritual awakening I’m currently experiencing.
P.S. Let me know in the Spotify or Instagram poll if you’ve experienced a spiritual awakening or dark night of the soul. Or, share your wisdom with me in the Spotify Q&A or IG comments.
This is a special episode with a surprise guest at the end 😉. I turned 40 this month and something shifted in me this birthday. I arrived into a comfort with who I am that I’ve never had before. I’m a vibe. And I’m capable. And I’ve endured and survived so much. I’m ready for an era of joy, DEEP self-confidence and shining boldly as me on an even bigger scale than I ever have before.
Today I’m reflecting back on each decade of my life and celebrating something wonderful about who I was in that season of my life, and one lesson I’ve learned or what I wish I had understood in that season of my life. Some surprising things came up including an unplanned guest who shared what she’s witnessed in me as I turn 40!
Guys. Everywhere I look I see an unhappy or failed marriage or people going through monumental challenges in order to find marital happiness again. Is marriage all that it’s cracked up to be? Is the cost I’m seeing (the work, heartache, drama, danger) worth the benefits? I’m questioning whether or not I still want it.
Does marriage still mean to us and play the role in society that it used to? Should it? If not, what should it be instead? Is marriage the only noble path or singleness just as much a form of security, growth, happiness and support? Could the cost benefit analysis of singleness actually come out on top? Join me as I talk about the value proposition of marriage and share my story and what I’m learning about whether or not marriage is actually a good fit for me and women like me.
Do you want to join me on a future episode to discuss this topic? Let me know in my DM’s or the episode comments on Instagram @tenjiwe and I'll set it up!
Happy New Year, lovies! My blessing for all of us is that we don’t reject how hard we worked, the risks we took, the fears we faced, and the incredible strides we made in our lives in 2023 by entering into hustle and do the most energy in 2024. Let’s go easier on ourselves this year. Let’s create a soft place for us to land by being our cheerleaders and supporters, and by having REALISTIC expectations of what is possible for us this year. It will be a good year and a hard year. Let’s set ourselves up for success. Let’s lovingly encourage ourselves and pay attention to the energy with which we set New Year’s resolutions (if we do them) and with which we evaluate what was and was not achieved in 2023.
Love and light, and a beautiful blessing for 2024 for you from my guides at the end.
