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Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

The Jerk Store

39 episodes

4 days ago

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen - the definitive guide to all things Van Halen. Join comedy's own Stephen Alan Yorke and Cheap Meat's Ross Drummond as they actually DO talk 'bout everything Van Halen... with a few pointless tangents in between. You'll laugh! You'll cry! Perhaps you'll side with team David Lee Roth or Sammy Hagar. And maybe you'll pick up fashion tips from Gary Cherone and his leather waistcoats!

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All content for Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen is the property of The Jerk Store and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen - the definitive guide to all things Van Halen. Join comedy's own Stephen Alan Yorke and Cheap Meat's Ross Drummond as they actually DO talk 'bout everything Van Halen... with a few pointless tangents in between. You'll laugh! You'll cry! Perhaps you'll side with team David Lee Roth or Sammy Hagar. And maybe you'll pick up fashion tips from Gary Cherone and his leather waistcoats!

Show more...

Episodes (20/39)

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 39 - Mammoth WVH - Live in London - July 2024

Greetings upon greetings to all VH-loving speaker systems everywhere!

Yes it's that time again for another issue of your _(insert number here)_st / nd / rd / th favourite Van Halen podcast that’s out there on the digital broadcast cyberhighway!

Now we do like sailing along in our relationship with you dear listener, but like any good relationship it's important to spice things up every now and again to keep things interesting isn't it... that's why this episode has temporarily moved away from all and any VH-related record analysising and, following a successful field trip to London's O2 Islington Academy, we've moved on to this podcast's first live gig review of... Wolfie's recent Mammoth WVH show!!

EXPECT... Rig-rundowns! Accidental knife smuggling! Encore debates! Audition tales! Flammable near-misses! And soOo much more....

Do enjoy the show, but before you leave please pick up any litter and take it with you.
What do you mean, "Why?"
You wouldn't leave your own house in a mess like that would you??
No. Exactly.
Thank you for your co-operation.

Also! if you are so inclined and have access to both a keyboard and next door's Wi-Fi password, please do leave us a review inside your chosen podcast platform's review zone. Whatever we see we'll deffo read it out.... the good, even the bad and especially the ugly.

You can also message or mention us on that angry social place that has since rebranded with a swanky new name that no-one ever uses: twitter.com/talkinvanhalen and on the Facebooks which nobody cool really goes on anymore: facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen

Enjoy the show, dear podpal!
Thank you for being here and not over there.

Fistbumps aplenty,

Steve + Ross at ATBVH HQ.

1 year ago

1 hour 22 minutes 13 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 38 - The Collection II

Ahoy there, dear listener!

Your audio pals Steve & Ross are back casting pods around Lake Internet and reeling them in to bring you a review of their latest catch — The Collection II!

And to pursue this totally random angling analogy a little further; there's nothing fishy going on when such a treasure trove of previously unreleased Sammy-era VH treasures are released into the wild and served up for us salivating fans to feast upon with a side order of corkscrew-hair-shaped Hagar fries.

Thanks to Mister Drummond of course for sacrificing his future pension plan by allowing us a peek inside his own personal box set edition, after delicately cutting a tiny portion of the protective cellophane with surgical precision to reveal a glimmer of the goodies within.

Expect insights and outtakes, factoids and trivia, assessments and critiques, tangents and nonsense and loads of silly voices as usual.

Also, if you are so inclined and have access to both a keyboard and next door's Wi-Fi password, please do leave us a review inside your chosen podcast platform's review zone. Whatever we see we'll deffo read it out.... the good, even the bad and especially the ugly.

You can also message or mention us on that angry social place that has since rebranded with a swanky new name that no-one ever uses: twitter.com/talkinvanhalen and on the Facebooks which nobody cool really goes on anymore: facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen

Enjoy the show, dear podpal!
Thank you for being here and not over there.

Fistbumps aplenty,

Steve + Ross at ATBVH HQ.

1 year ago

1 hour 23 minutes 2 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 37 - Mammoth WVH - Mammoth II

Podderers!
Podbods!
OnlyPoddyFans!

Seeeeee!! As promised, it's not been an eternity of decades since the previous episode has it! Say what you like about this poddington-pod (and if you've ever read our reviews you'll know that some people certainly do) but we are true to our word... as long as we don't have to sign anything official that legally binds us to it of course.

And we're proper delighted to be devoting this latest instalment to our favourite celebrity Wolf! (With Wolf from the 1990's UK version of 'Gladiators' and that alpha wolf animal actor from Liam Neeson's 2011 action romp 'The Grey' coming in second and third.) But we're not just talkin' WVH, more specifically his recent(ish) mighty second album!

So sit back and pump up the jam (or the volume if you don't care for fruit preserves) as Steve & Ross use a variety of theoretical stainless steel instruments to dissect and review 'Mammoth II'.... via all the usual tangents plus unplanned but welcome appearances from their old friend Ringo Starr and new friends Mrs. Laila the Cow, Fake Elvis and Michael 'Mister Jazz' Baskette.

Also, if you are so inclined and have access to both a keyboard and next door's Wi-Fi password, please do leave us a review inside your chosen podcast platform's review zone. Whatever we see we'll deffo read it out.... the good, even the bad and especially the ugly.

You can also message or mention us on that angry social place that has since rebranded with a swanky new name that no-one ever uses: twitter.com/talkinvanhalen and on the Facebooks which nobody cool really goes on anymore: facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen

Enjoy the show, dear podpal!
Thank you for being here and not over there.

Fistbumps aplenty,

Steve + Ross at ATBVH HQ.

1 year ago

1 hour 36 minutes 44 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 36 - What's new in =VH= World 2024

We listened, dear Listener!

Yes, after spending thousands upon thousands on expensive podcast focus groups we listened to the feedback... and after kindly giving the world's ears a deserving year and a half's rest from our nonsense – WE'RE BACK – to broadcast more flights of fancy from the Van Halen chopper!

Well, a news broadcast to be precise. Since it's been so long, there sure is a heck of a load for us all to catch up on.

Mainly thanks to the D to the L to the R, who has definitely not been inactive during this period and kindly given us an endless cavalcade of shocking shenanigans to dissect and discuss.

No spoilers here though – all of this tantalising talk and more in a brand new(s) episode!

Also, if you are so inclined with access to a keyboard and next door's Wi-Fi password, please do leave us a review inside your chosen podcast platform's review zone.

We also welcome messages or mentions on that angry social place that has since been rebranded with a swanky new name that no-one ever uses: twitter.com/talkinvanhalen

And on the Facebooks which nobody cool really goes on anymore: facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen

Enjoy the show, dear Listener! Thank you for being here and not over there.

Fistbumps aplenty,

Steve + Ross at ATBVH HQ.

PS. Here's the links that Ross mentioned during the episode:

John 5 talking about working with DLR - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FP8KJzTlrzA

EVH 1998 Studio Tour - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WpzyxHnN7HM

1 year ago

1 hour 7 minutes 48 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 35 - What's new in =VH= World 2022

Greetings most excellent listener! Ohhh hang on, you’ve got your angry face on…. Yes yes, you have every right to be annoyed – downright irate in fact. But if you’re gonna blame anybody for the almost-a-year delay between episodes, blame nature…. Steve + Ross went into hibernation last October, and one of the bears in their colony annoyingly (and rather typically) forgot to put the alarm on. And whilst they’ve both been snoozing and inwardly feasting upon their stored fats and blubber, what a (nearly) 12 months it’s been!

3 years ago

1 hour 23 minutes 11 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 34 - 2 Steves 1 (Franken)Strat

It was probably the legendary Freddie Mercury who put it best... "One man. One goal. One mission. One global lockdown. One replica guitar. One work station. One spray can. ONE VISION." Er, it went something like that anyway…. The point is, without knowing it, Lord Mercury coincidentally and unwittingly predicted the future project of Mr. Steve Reekie – talented guitarist and friend of the ATBVH podcast – who undertook the building of a totally playable and highly-detailed replica of Edward Van Halen's ultra-iconic Frankenstrat guitar during the UK’s 2020 Covid lockdown. (It’s at enviously impressive times like this that the rest of us wish we hadn’t spent each lockdown combined attempting to bake the perfect loaf of banana bread.) In a podcast first! ATBVH’s first ever guest, Steve joins Steve (the other one) and Ross to discuss the step-by-step steps of how Frankenstrat’s unofficial yet just as handsome British cousin was born. PLUS! Your eyes can also watch along! By going to Steve's Instagrams @steveohhno and observing the accompanying pics and vids. But that’s not all…. ! EXPECT! Mind-blowing insight on how EVH created parts of the original axe! MARVEL! At Sherlock Holmes-levels of cigarette burn analysis! REJOICE! In hearing Steve (not that one) and fellow musician Ross converse in such impressive guitar vernacular that they sound like two doctors discussing complicated surgical procedures! And remember, dear listener! Keep on carrying on messaging us on the Twitters at @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. And if you leave us a sexy podcast review we’ll give you the shout-out equivalent of a saucy post-date peck on the cheek. (With tongues.) Cheeeeeeeers!

4 years ago

1 hour 1 minute 59 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 33 - Mammoth WVH

SUMMON THE DEVILS! AWAKEN THE DEMONS! DILUTE THE SPIRITS! WE ARE BACK! So after reading a random article about wild bears and the benefits of annual hibernation, Steve and Ross return from a refreshingly deep January to August sleep (off-grid in a bunk bed in the woods) to bring you a brand new episode of ATBVH! And as a special reward for waiting around this long, dear listener… we’ve veered off the path (yet again) and parked our current mission of documenting and reviewing Samuel Roy Hagar’s pre-VH solo output (er, yet again) to bring you a special topical review of the artist formerly known as Wolfgang Van Halen’s brand spankingly-new debut solo album ‘Mammoth WVH.’ Rumours of such a project were teased out there on the VH grapevine as we recorded our premiere episode back in 2016, so this has been a long time coming. Though not quite as long as the album, which will be an even bigger hit to those who like getting more bangers for their bucks! And how Alanis Morissettely ironic that a podcast notorious for stubbornly long episodes should arrive at one of its shortest ones. (Or ‘normal episode length’ as all the other podcasts call it.) Don’tcha think? Words will be spoken! Opinions will be given! Insights will be shared! Nonsense will be uttered! Tangents will be accessed! Personnel will be impersonated! And if you fancy having yourself perfectly preserved in audio format from now until eternity ends, then drop us a review or a message and we’ll give you the mother of all vocal shout-outs. The grandmother of all vocal shout-outs, more like. No! The great-great-GREAT-grandmother of all vocalised shout outs. THAT’S how big it will be. Message us on the Twitters at @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. And a podcast review is especially appreciated – good ones are proper lovely (and bad ones are well funny), so do keep ‘em coming! Until the next time… cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeers and hand-sanitised fistpumps!

4 years ago

1 hour 37 minutes 57 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 32 - Cheap Meat | People Are The Worst

If you're in a band that exists purely because of Van Halen AND you have a longstanding podcast about the band, THEN you have your debut album coming out, what do you do?! Well, you hope the fans of the show will get stuck in and listen as Ross and Steve go through the album track by track! We're talking Ross' band Cheap Meat, and their Debut Album People Are The Worst! It's a big un! From Robert Burns history to Whitesnake guitar solos, making the old granny's in Cultercullen cry via Dave Stewart of the Eurythmics. We've got it all. And be sure to go ahead and get a copy of the album via https://cheapmeat.bandcamp.com AND HEY, DON'T FORGET.... we use a fancy telepathy app to type with our minds on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep tweeting us tweetings and faceposting us faceposts, and we'll shout you out via spoken fireworks in our next episode. However, if you want the biggest shoutout since records began... give our podcast a review on one of the many reputable podcast outlets for an absolute ticker-tape parade of a mention. Stay safe out there, dear listeners! Wash your hands, scrub your toes and more importantly.... be excellent to each other.

4 years ago

2 hours 25 minutes 44 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 31 - Live Without a Net (Christmas Special)

Season's Tidings this Christmas Eve, dear listener! On the (day before the) first day of Chrimbus, your true loves (Santa Steve & Ross Claus) bring to you another audio issue of their (semi) annual ATBVH Holiday Special – recorded remotely from the soundproofed nest of their rock n' roll pear tree! Yep that's right, the boys are dinging and donging merrily on high once again, and using a magnifying glass pulled from one of last year's Christmas crackers to analyse the Sound and Vision wonder that is 'LIVE WITHOUT A NET'! Expect multiple swoons over EVH's legendary solo! Marvel at Michael Anthony's lucrative on-stage lemonade empire! Make merry with random Christmas movie chatter! Ponder upon irrelevant favourite festive song choices! And much and loads and tons more nonsense! Tah-Tah until the New Year, dear listener.... but in the meantime.... in the words of the big man himself.... "MERRRRY CHRISTMASSINGS TO ALL, AND TO ALL – MERRRRRRRRY CHRIIIIIIIIIIIISTMASSINGS!!!!!!" BY THE WAY! We like to type things and post them on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks too at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep tweeting us tweetings and faceposting us faceposts and we’ll make you immediately immortal by preserving your name in a recorded shoutout that shall be preserved forevermore. But if you wish to be catapulted straight to the top of Father Christmas's 'Good' list, type our show a review on a pod-based platform like the iTunes's! Thanks and socially distant elbowfistbumps dear listeners, socially distant elbowfistbumps!

4 years ago

1 hour 54 minutes 19 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 30 - Remembering Eddie

Right Now, you're listening to our Van Halen podcast. Right Now we're all thinking about Eddie. Right Now, the world is still in shock. Right Now feels appropriate to park our usual nonsense and buffoonery. Right Now we're paying tribute to the great man's life and work instead. Right Now, you're hearing Steve and Ross trying hard to juggle paying their respects and still be kind of entertaining at the same time. Right Now, Steve is probably saying "That's really sweet" far too many times. Right Now, Ross still thinks that going to Canada in 2015 to see Van Halen live was his best decision ever. Right Now, the listeners are relieved to learn that this episode is shorter than they normally are. Right Now, some people aren't totally getting this 'Right Now' reference so here's a link to the official video: http://bit.ly/RightNowMusicVideo Right Now you can message us inside the Facebooks at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen and on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen. RiGHt nOW tHIS KeyBOARd is PLayING up AGAin. Right Now we hope you're all staying safe out there, dear listeners!

5 years ago

1 hour 12 minutes 4 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 29 - Montrose

Greetings and socially distanced, fully sanitised elbow fistbumps to you dear listener! Yes, your friendly neighbourhood Van Halen podcasters are back in the digital saddle and galloping towards you with another audio issue of nonsense! Although things have been better... Steve has just tried to open a bank account at a branch that doesn't exist, and Ross is having NASA-esque levels of technical problems.... but let's not worry about any of that now! Why? Because it's the beginning of a magical (depending on your allegiance) new section of ATBVH! Move over Harry Potter... it's time for 'Sammy Hagar and the Solo Discography Section of Joy.' That's right! After completing an in-depth exploration of DLR's solo exploits, the boys are traversing a sidestep to the right (and milking the podcast for as long as they can) as they explore the Samuel 'Roy' Hagar (SRH?) post-VH body of work. Whether you like it or not! Steve and Ross begin by parting this chunky mane of corkscrew curls and climbing inside that Red Rocking mind to take the first of many future strolls down Hagar Memory Lane. Starting with – his first band – you know, the one beginning with 'M.' Hmmm.... Mongoose? Don't be silly. Monsoon? You're testing our patience now. Monterey Jack Cheese? We're warning you... MONTROSE!!!! Correct!! Yes, it's time for 'Sammy Hagar and the Montrose Rockers of Glory.' Listen in wonder as both Steve and Ross use spoken words to uncover a treasure trove of Fun Facts™ and tall tales that surround SRH's first foray into rockyroll. Expect new characters! Dilapidated scooters! Candy made from rocks! Featuring cola can-eating goats! Rancid goat milk! And other pointless goat and non-goat tangents! AND HEY, DON'T FORGET.... we use a fancy telepathy app to type with our minds on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep tweeting us tweetings and faceposting us faceposts and we'll shout you out via spoken fireworks in our next episode. However, if you want the biggest shoutout since records began... give our podcast a review on one of the many reputable podcast outlets for an absolute ticker-tape parade of a mention. Stay safe out there dear listeners! Wash your hands, scrub your toes and more importantly.... be excellent to each other.

5 years ago

1 hour 23 minutes 36 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 28 - Diver Lockdown (DLR Band)

GREEEEEETINGS DEAR LISTENERS! Ok, ok... don’t be mad that it's been EIGHT ACTUAL MONTHS since our last pod-based broadcast... The thing is, unfortunately and until very recently, we've been trapped genie-style inside a Sammy Hagar Cabo Wabo tequila bottle. We were slurring our words so badly whilst drinking that we accidentally cast a dark spell on ourselves that sucked us inside and it took so very long to smash our way out. Sounds unbelievable eh!?! BUT the good news is that we’re out and WE’RE BACK! Now we may have returned to a global pandemic and subsequent international quarantine (we really REALLY didn't expect THAT) but we're determined to lift spirits higher than a classic VH harmony section. How? By reviewing David Lee Roth's solo 'DLR Band' album of course.... in a shiny new separately-together, remotely-recorded 'DIVER LOCKDOWN' edition! "Wa Wa Zat?" Yes you heard right, it's our lost DLR Band episode! Well, lost in that we thought we had recorded it last year... but turns out what actually happened is we met up and just talked nonsense about other stuff instead and didn't get around to recording anything. So here it is at last. Expect slam dunks! Expert track analysis! Album artwork despair! Umpteen song fatigue! New technology impressions! And SO much more! AND HEY, DON'T FORGET.... we use a fancy telepathy app to type with our minds on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep tweeting us tweetings and faceposting us faceposts and we'll shout you out via spoken fireworks in our next episode. However, if you want the biggest shoutout since records began... give our podcast a review on one of the many reputable podcast outlets for aN ABSOLUTE ticker-tape parade of a mention. Take care out there dear listeners, wash your hands and behind your ears, but more importantly – STAY AWAY FROM EMPTY LIQUOR BOTTLES AND DEEP DARK MAGIC!

5 years ago

1 hour 31 minutes 30 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 27 - Diamond Dave

What do you get when you’ve two of the smartest minds in podcasting? Well, belated and sporadic episodes for a start (sorry again dear listener) BUT you also get hosts of a Top 60 comedy podcast in Finland (this is not a drill!) AND... um... er... um... you get an album skipped too... ! Yep we admit it, so dazzled have we been by Dave’s solo offerings that we totally missed out an album! ‘DLR Band’? Where's that gone then? We’ve looked everywhere... inside our hard drives, under the mouse mat, Ross even turned his old house upside-down (the new residents were NOT happy) but nope, it's gone.But don’t worry we’ll find it! Then go back and do the DLR band album next. Look, just think of it as us approaching Mister Roth’s solo output like Pulp Fiction – we're already at the end, and now it’s big band time, it's funky 90s, it's well... whatever's knocking about in the studio broom cupboard, on this – the final (as it stands) solo album from ‘Diamond Dave’!We talk about the infamous Sammy & DLR Tour, Dave's penchant for a platinum blonde dye, Matthew McConaughey-inspired noodling and well... all your usual ATBVH tomfoolery, bumbling and fun!Let's Diamond Dive right into Diamond Dave! PLUUUUSSS DON'T FORGET!We are semi-active typers on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks too at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep tweeting us tweetings and faceposting us faceposts and we'll shout you out in verbal neon next time BIG TIME. However, if you want the megashoutout of ultrashououts... type the show a review on the ol' iTunes (or other podcast outlet!) for a veritable spoken ticker-tape parade. Fistbumps dear listeners, fistbumps!

6 years ago

57 minutes 59 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 26 - Your Filthy Little Mouth

As promised standard album review services have resumed, dear listener(s)! That can mean only one thing....Good Times! These are the good times! Leave your cares behind! David Lee Roth has undoubtedly been trying to do that, after getting nicked by the rozzers in New York. Why? For not washing his mouth out with soap enough! That's right folks, it's time for 'Your Filthy Little Mouth’!Aaaaaaah... Freak out! Le Freak, C'est Chic! Oi! Who's left a Kangol cap on the mixing desk? Has Tuggle started experimenting with new hats? Is Billy trying to use some sort of mind control? Is that a disco beat? Where are they coming from? Reggae? Is that a jazz cigarette? What ON EARTH is happening? Well for a start, Tuggle returns... Brookside is discussed... we get a BAD review... ramblin' Roth's on fine form... there’s a harmonica + vibrating phone mash-up... no end-Endgame spoilers via Marvel... cherry liqueur chocolate discussions... Matthew McConaughey reads some DLR lyrics... Sir Ian McKellen briefly stops by (again)... OH, and the aforementioned 1994 DLR album is discussed too... in another tangent-filled, randomly-layered episode of Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen!PLUUUUSSS DON’T FORGET!We are semi-active typers on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks too at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep tweeting us tweetings and faceposting us faceposts and we’ll shout you out in verbal neon next time BIG TIME. However, if you want the megashoutout of ultrashououts, type the show a review on the ol’ iTunes for a veritable spoken ticker tape parade! Fistbumps dear listeners, fistbumps!

6 years ago

1 hour 18 minutes 47 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 25 - What's David Lee Roth been up to? (Fixed Audio!)

Goodness us, Dear Listener! What can we say but bestow our humblest apologies... it's been an age – an ice (cream man) age! SooOoo long in fact, that actual new VH-based news has surfaced of late and is occurring “riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight NOW.” So we’ve veered off the usual album-review highway and stopped off at the nearest cheap motel to devote an entire episode to ‘New VH/Roth/Hagar News’ – complete with impromptu jingles! Well, it had to be done... for one thing, David Lee Roth decided to make a tattoo cream (obvs) and then promote it on multiple different outlets being David Lee Roth in the only way we know he can. Does he randomly talk about Kayaking? Sure! Does he appear on stage out-of-the-blue at an electronic music festival with a Dutch fella? You bet! Do we learn anything about anything at all? Almost certainly not! But we're here, we've got a bowl of M&Ms, and we're munching deep into the world of what's currently going on with our friend and yours; Diamond Dave! And a couple of other fellas named Sammy and Eddie too.(Disclaimer for those who fear change)Normal album review service will resume next month.In the meantime, follow along with these handy links on the YouTubes that are mentioned:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TaGiJ0MHvq4 - DLR on Joe Mega Cuthttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lkG4K8nmliQ - DLR @ Ultra MusicANNNND DON’T FORGET!We are active typers on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks too at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep tweeting us tweetings and faceposting us faceposts and we’ll shout you out in verbal neon next time BIG TIME. However, if you want the megashoutout of ultrashououts, type the show a review on the ol’ iTunes for a veritable spoken ticker tape parade! Fistbumps dear listeners, fistbumps!

6 years ago

1 hour 26 minutes 51 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 24 - The Christmas Special

We've been making a list, checking it twice, now come and find out if you've been naughty or nice! You guessed it... it's the Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen Christmas Special!Wolfgang's roasted (ie. burnt) the chestnuts by an open fire, Michael Anthony's nipping at your nose and Eddie and Alex have eaten all the Celebrations but left all the Twix's. Typical. Never fear, festive cheer is near! Christmas Specials are the podcast equivalent of end of school term/semester. So Santa Steve's brought along his jingle jangle feet, and Ross Claus has dialled his guitar virtuosity up to 11. Why? Because in this episode we’re channelling our inner DLR and writing a David Lee Roth Christmas song on-air that the world didn't necessarily want OR necessarily deserve! Ho! Ho! Ho! MERRRRY CHRISTMAS!!DON’T FORGET!We are active typers on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks too at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep tweeting us tweetings and faceposting us faceposts and we’ll shout you out in verbal neon next time BIG TIME. However, if you want the megashoutout of ultrashououts, type the show a review on the ol’ iTunes for a veritable spoken ticker tape parade! Fistbumps dear listeners, fistbumps!

6 years ago

1 hour 9 minutes 46 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 23 - A Little Ain't Enough

"Bye Bye Vai...!Oi, Tuggle! Bissonette Brothers! Rocket! Get over here!" "Seems like it's only a few of us here, Dave..." "Ha! A Little Ain't Enough!""Sounds like a good name for an album in 1991, boss.""YOU’RE DAMN RIGHT!!!"Grunge, so much grunge... all over poor DLR’s spandex. So better start shooting videos in black and white to hide those pesky Seattle coffee stains, Dave. Meanwhile, Mr. Tuggle is on an Aerosmith bender and Bob Rock is getting annoyed in the booth. PLUS... Sir Ian McKellan is back from the Bard with another reciting of some of DLR’s lyrics, and Matthew Mcconaughey is telling you all about the lawn uptake that you didn't know you need! All this and more in another DLR solo adventure/dream/nightmare... it's... ‘A Little Ain't Enough’!DON’T FORGET!We are active typers on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks too at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep tweeting us tweetings and faceposting us faceposts and we’ll shout you out in verbal neon next time BIG TIME. However, if you want the megashoutout of ultrashououts, type the show a review on the ol’ iTunes for a veritable spoken ticker tape parade! Fistbumps dear listeners, fistbumps!

7 years ago

1 hour 33 minutes 46 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 22 - Skyscraper

Give me a surfboard! Give me a boxing ring! Give me bass turned very low in the mix and while you're at it could you make sure this album sounds as exactly like the era it was recorded as possible? Build it low? Absolutely not, it's time to talk.... Skyscraper!OU812? Don't mind if I do! It's 1988 – David has been touring the world, meeting up with ex-producers in coffee shops, taking umbrage with dexterous bass guitarists and having nightmares with the dry cleaning bill of Steve Vai's billowy shirts. We dive deep into the photoshoot that nearly killed Dave, check the medical records of a certain Dr. Funk and learn all about the boy from Burnley who set the keyboard world alight (or at least the electricity bill from all those pesky synths!) All this and more in our mammoth building of an episode... it's all things David Lee Roth and his ultra-glam Skyscraper!DON’T FORGET! We're on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks too at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep dropping us tweets and faceposts and we’ll shout you out on the next episode BIG TIME. However, if you want the megashoutout of ultrashououts, type the show a review on the ol’ iTunes for a verbal ticker tape parade! Fistbumps dear listeners, fistbumps!

7 years ago

1 hour 42 minutes 3 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 21 - Eat 'Em and Smile

Lights! Camera! Cancelled?! Troubles a foot in paradise... we're going to need spandex, a Scientologist and that fella with a handle in his guitar. We might be a while folks, it's time to Eat 'Em and Smile!It's 1985. David Lee Roth has fully found his true calling and as Pasadena's answer to Steven Spielberg. It's time to take those 3 and a half minute videos to feature length. It's like Spielberg if he had a penchant for high colour saturation and fat suits. You might want to watch yourself though, that chequebook is looking mighty elastic if you catch my drift... Just as well we've got everyone's favourite tea-chugging Yorkshireman behind the 1s and 2s! That's right Ted Templeman is 100% team DLR (for now.) So get on your favourite dance pumps and order an Uber to tobacco road. We're going to be delving into the world that is "Eat 'Em and Smile"!DON’T FORGET! We're on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks too at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep dropping us tweets and faceposts and we’ll shout you out on the next episode BIG TIME. However, if you want the megashoutout of ultrashououts, type the show a review on the ol’ iTunes for a verbal ticker tape parade! Fistbumps dear listeners, fistbumps!

7 years ago

1 hour 27 minutes 34 seconds

Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Van Halen

Episode 20 - Crazy from the Heat

If David Lee Roth calls, is it really a conversation? Is that a Beach Boy? Is it Christopher Cross? Where’s the top of my hat? It must be the weather, we’re going Crazy from the Heat!It’s 1984, the Van Halen brothers are back at the ranch. Ted Templeman’s been called up for the England squad. DLR is wearing ski goggles indoors and starting a TV show. We’re in New York, we’re in California, we’re wearing Spandex and jazz shoes! Take a load off dear listener, we’re diving into the David Lee Roth solo era. It’s the Crazy from the Heat EP!DON’T FORGET! We're on the Twitters @TalkinVanHalen and inside the Facebooks too at Facebook.com/TalkinVanHalen. So keep dropping us tweets and faceposts and we’ll shout you out on the next episode BIG TIME. However, if you want the megashoutout of ultrashououts, type the show a review on the ol’ iTunes for a verbal ticker tape parade! Fistbumps dear listeners, fistbumps!

7 years ago

1 hour 13 minutes 54 seconds