In this second installment of Therapists’ Take on the dark side of couples therapy, Dr. Shannon Dial and Whitney Alexander rejoin us to push the conversation even further. While couples therapy is often seen as a pathway to healing, not every situation—or every client dynamic—fits neatly into that frame. This episode shines a light on the places where couples therapy can actually backfire, enabling harm instead of helping.
From the subtle timing of emotional wounds to the dangerous potential of ignoring abuse, our guests unpack the tough realities that therapists, couples, and even individuals need to face when entering the therapy room. Together, we wrestle with hard questions: When is neutrality dangerous? How can therapists unwitting be complicit in abuse cycles? And when does the “couple’s problem” framework itself become part of the problem?
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00:00 - Intro
00:45 - Assessing Abuse
04:00 - The Timing of the Wounding
06:40 - The Problem with Agendas
09:00 - Is "Part of the Problem" Part of the Problem?
12:50 - Deciphering Sociopathy in Couples
15:18 - The Part that Is Complicit
22:10 - Using Couples Therapy as a Crutch
42:56 - Practical Takeaways-ish
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Why I Hate Your Podcast (article) - this is related to the discussion from the Part 1 intro.
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About our guests:
We’re thrilled to be joined by Dr. Shannon Dial, LMFT, from Family Solutions Counseling in Oklahoma City, and Whitney Alexander, LMFT, EMDR Consultant, and owner of the Warren-Alexander Group in Stillwater.
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For more great content, please check out our LinkTree at https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
When we think of couples therapy, we often imagine healing, communication, and hope. But what if the very process that’s meant to help actually makes things worse?
In this first half of our live discussion, returning guests Dr. Shannon Dial and Whitney Alexander join us to unpack the expectations people bring into couples therapy, how the field itself continues to evolve, and the subtle ways counseling can shift from supportive to harmful.
From the hopeful beginnings of what therapy should be, to the sobering reality of how it can sometimes miss the mark, this episode explores the groundwork leading up to the question: What happens when couples therapy turns dark?
Whether you’re a therapist, a client, or simply curious, this conversation will challenge you to think critically about the real dynamics at play in the therapy room.
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00:00 - Hi, Carrie (intro)
01:43 - Guest Introductions
03:04 - Whitney's Topic
06:55 - Episode Breakdown
08:30 - Expectations of Couples Therapy
13:08 - The Ever-Evolving Landscape of Couples Therapy
20:27 - When Couples Therapy Turns Dark
26:48 - Wrapping Up Part 1
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Why I Hate Your Podcast (article) - this is related to the discussion from the intro.
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About our guests:
We’re thrilled to be joined by Dr. Shannon Dial, LMFT, from Family Solutions Counseling in Oklahoma City, and Whitney Alexander, LMFT, EMDR Consultant, and owner of the Warren-Alexander Group in Stillwater.
______________________For more great content, please check out our LinkTree at https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
Ever feel like there’s a whole cast of characters living inside your head? You’re not alone — and Pixar’s Inside Out might be closer to real life than you think. In this episode of Therapists’ Take, we break down the concept of "parts language" through the Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy model, using the Inside Out movies as our guide. We’ll talk about why it sometimes feels like different “parts” of us are pulling in opposite directions, how that actually makes sense from a therapeutic perspective, and how getting to know our inner cast can bring more balance, compassion, and joy to everyday life.
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00:00 - Intro | Hi, Carrie | Multitasking
03:34 - Fun Facts about Inside Out Movie
10:18 - Episode Breakdown
10:54 - IFS Therapy & Parts Language
20:25 - Getting to Know Your Parts
29:00 - Who Is in the Driver's Seat?
38:21 - Practical Application
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Mental Health Resources
Find an IFS Therapist Near You - https://ifs-institute.com/practitioners
Find therapists near you that utilize IFS model - https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists
Consider counseling at Family Solutions Counseling - https://www.familysolutionsok.com
Try our Kids clinic - https://www.fsc.kids
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Good Reads
No Bad Parts by Richard Schwartz - https://amzn.to/3IbFtrx
No Bad Parts (children's book) - https://amzn.to/467MBOP
You Are the One You've Been Waiting For by Richard Schwartz - https://amzn.to/4ntLtKZ
Richard Schwartz 3 Book Collection - https://amzn.to/42r1V6I
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Inside Out Related Items
Get the movies - https://amzn.to/42zgUvn
Figurine Set - https://amzn.to/3IaupuJ
Plush Set - https://amzn.to/46oLetM
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As Amazon Affiliates, we earn from qualifying purchases.
For more great content, please check out our LinkTree at https://linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
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Fair Use Notice:
This podcast episode makes reference to the Inside Out films for the purposes of commentary, critique, and education. Inside Out and all related characters, titles, and elements are the intellectual property of Pixar Animation Studios and The Walt Disney Company. The use of these references is protected under the doctrine of fair use (17 U.S.C. § 107) as they are employed for non-commercial, educational, and transformative discussion within the context of psychotherapy and mental health concepts.
In this episode of Therapists’ Take, Carrie and Josh unpack the rapidly evolving intersection of artificial intelligence and mental health counseling. They explore pressing questions: How is AI already being used in the field? What are the risks of introducing it into such a sacred, human-centered space? Could AI ever replace the need for therapists—or does it simply serve as a tool to enhance care?
This conversation is designed to spark curiosity and dialogue, whether you’re a therapist, a client, or simply someone intrigued by the future of mental health.
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00:00 - Hi, Carrie! (Intro)
01:00 - An Intimidating Topic
09:28 - Episode Breakdown
10:29 - The Therapist's Role in an AI Era
18:28 - AI as a Useful Tool for Mental Health
24:50 - The Psychological Impact on Clients
33:07 - The Future of Mental Healthcare and AI
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Resources:
(article) The Reality of Instant AI Therapy | Psychology Today
🙋 Audience Questions
Would you feel comfortable opening up to an AI therapist? Why or why not?
Do you think AI will ever truly replicate human empathy?
💬 Submit your own questions for the podcast here: https://forms.gle/J1Tm1AwVKKw5QTt27
🌐 Explore more content: https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
👉 If you enjoyed today’s conversation, please like, subscribe, and share for more thoughtful takes on the evolving world of therapy.
In this compelling episode of Therapists’ Take, we sit down with family law attorney and author Brian Putnam to unpack the complex and often misunderstood reality of domestic abuse. Drawing on decades of legal experience and personal insight, Brian shares what it truly takes to break free from abuse—and the critical steps toward safety, justice, and healing.
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00:00 - Hi, Carrie! (Intro)
01:38 - Guest: Brian Putnam
02:50 - The Reason for the Book
06:14 - Who Should Read It
09:15 - Encyclopedia of Domestic Abuse
17:43 - Healing the Wounds
28:30 - Breaking Free & Safety Planning
34:04 - Preventing Domestic Abuse
About Our Guest:
Brian Putnam is an experienced attorney, advocate, and author of Escaping Domestic Abuse: A Step-by-Step Guide to Breaking Free. Through his legal work and writing, Brian provides survivors with clear, compassionate guidance for navigating the legal system and safely leaving abusive situations.
For more information about Brian and/or the legal services his team provides, please visit https://www.PutnamLawOffice.com.
To purchase the book, Escaping Domestic Abuse: A Step-by-Step Guide to Breaking Free, you can do so by clicking the following link - https://amzn.to/47zeFeS
As Amazon Affiliates, we earn from qualifying purchases.
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Domestic Abuse Resources
Oklahoma Specific Domestic Abuse Resources
Other Resources Mentioned
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For more great content, check out our linktree at https://linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
After a two-month pause, we’re back—and this time, we’re leaning into the space of transition. In this reflective return episode, we explore what it means to live in the “in-between”—those seasons where you’ve stepped away from what’s familiar but haven’t yet arrived at what’s next.
As therapists, we spend a lot of time with people in this very space: between what was and what will be. Today, we’re sharing our take on how to understand, navigate, and even grow through these pivotal moments of change.
We’re also thrilled to introduce our new producer, Alexander “Zander” Holland. Zander is a licensed therapist with a special focus on betrayal trauma couple recovery, and we couldn’t be more excited to have him join our growing podcast team.
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In this episode, we explore:
The Uncertainty in Disruption
How disruptions—planned or unplanned—create anxiety, reveal unresolved fears, and challenge our sense of control.
The Grief in Growth
Why all growth includes letting go, and how to honor the sorrow that comes with moving forward.
The Opportunity in Reorganizing
How disruption creates space to reflect, refocus, and align life with your values in new ways.
The Gratitude in New Beginnings
Recognizing the beauty in starting again—and how even the hardest resets can hold surprising gifts.
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Book mentioned: The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer - https://amzn.to/3JlsnrR
As Amazon Associates, we earn from qualifying purchases.
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Learn more about Zander at https://www.familysolutionsok.com/alexander-holland
New Podcast just released: Poetry in Layers with Carl Patterson. Check it out wherever you get your podcast!
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For more great content, check out our linktree at https://linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
In this short and sunny episode of Therapists’ Take, we’re talking about the power of pressing pause—yes, even on the things we’re passionate about. As therapists, we get how easy it is to stay stuck in productivity mode, always connected and always “doing the work.” But sometimes, the most meaningful step forward is choosing to stop and just be.
As we head into our own summer break this June and July, we’re reflecting on what it really means to step back with purpose. Taking a break isn’t quitting—it’s an intentional act of self-care and courage.
Here’s what pressing pause can look like:
We’ll be taking a break from the podcast through June and July—but don’t worry, we’ll be back in August with more honest conversations and real talk about mental health, healing, and relationships.
Until then, take good care, slow down when you can, and remember—growth doesn’t always mean moving forward
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00:00 - Intro | Hi, Carrie!
01:10 - We are pressing pause.
03:56 - Episode Breakdown
08:06 - Fear of Facing Loss
13:22 - Being Still or Slowing Down
21:20 - Trying Something New
26:50 - Retreats, not Escapes
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Books Mentioned
As Amazon Affiliates, we earn on qualifying purchases.
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Therapists' Take on THE HEALING POWER of NATURE w/ Kelly Roberts - https://www.youtube.com/live/dbDHkJSkZ9Y?si=lPAiM7RvIcxw1eIV
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For more great episodes, please visit our LinkTree - https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
In this episode of the Therapists’ Take Podcast, we explore some uncomfortable—but essential—truths that emotionally healthy, non-codependent couples have learned to live by. At first glance, these insights might feel counterintuitive or even a little controversial. But rather than chasing the illusion of the perfect relationship, these couples have embraced a more grounded, realistic approach to love—one rooted in clarity, maturity, and genuine connection.
You might feel a little unsettled as we unpack these truths—not because they’re harsh, but because they challenge some deeply held assumptions. If you’ve ever questioned why conventional advice like “always compromise,” “love unconditionally,” or “just meet each other’s needs” often falls flat, this conversation will resonate. Most importantly, we’ll offer a more balanced, self-respecting framework for building meaningful relationships—without losing yourself along the way.
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00:00 - Intro | Hi, Carrie!
03:05 - Episode Breakdown
04:20 - The Shelf Life
06:30 - Prodependence Book
12:58 - Josh's Theory on Codependent Relationships
20:00 - What Is Interdependence?
22:32 - Hard Reality 1: Want vs Need
29:34 - Hard Reality 2: Unconditional vs Conditional
37:29 - Hard Reality 3: Compromise vs Sacrifice
47:00 - Hard Reality 4: Happiness vs Togetherness
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Books:
Prodependence by Rob Weiss - https://amzn.to/3Hbu8GQ
Facing Codependence by Pia Mellody - https://amzn.to/4dLjOBG
Codependent No More by Melody Beattie - https://amzn.to/3FAWc6g
As Amazon Associates, we earn from qualifying purchases
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Interview w/ Rob Weiss - https://youtu.be/W2Z48giYxR0
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For more great content, please visit or LinkTree - https://linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
In Part 2 of our heartfelt series, The Impact Our Clients Have on Us, we continue the conversation with the insightful Whitney Alexander, LMFT. This episode takes a deeper dive into the personal side of being a therapist—where our professional and human selves inevitably intersect.
We open up about our own vulnerabilities in couple relationships, the tension between being a "helper" and being human, and the sometimes uncomfortable question: Do we actually practice what we preach?
Join us for a candid, unscripted discussion that sheds light on the ways our clients challenge, shape, and humble us—and how, in turn, that makes us better partners, professionals, and people.
🧠 Topics we explore:
How working with clients challenges our own emotional growth
What it really means to be “human” in the therapy room
🎙️ Whether you're a fellow therapist or just curious about the minds behind the mental health work, this episode offers raw insights and relatable truths.
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00:00 - Intro to Part 2
01:11 - Jumping Back In
02:27 - Our Vulnerability
06:44 - Whitney Confronts Josh
10:16 - When Bad Things Happen
13:14- Practicing What we Preach
15:42 - What Our Clients Teach Us
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In this special two-part series, we’re joined once again by our friend and trusted colleague, Whitney Alexander, LMFT, owner of The Warren Alexander Group in Stillwater, OK.
This episode dives into a conversation that’s rarely had publicly—the personal and professional impact our clients have on us as therapists. In Part 1, we explore:
🔹 How our clients’ stories shape who we are as clinicians and people
🔹 The emotional weight that comes with walking alongside others in their pain
🔹 Why it’s vital for therapists to remain aware of their own internal responses
Whether you're a therapist, a client, or someone curious about the behind-the-scenes emotional world of mental health professionals, this episode offers honest insight and reflection.
🧠 About our guest:
Whitney Alexander, LMFT, is a seasoned therapist and one of our most respected colleagues. She’s been featured in two of our most popular episodes:
✔️ Episode 10 – The 3 Channels of Self-Awareness
✔️ Episode 32 – Complex PTSD and the Feeling of Brokenness
👀 Don’t miss Part 2 next week, where we go even deeper into the emotional toll—and rewards—of this work.
👉 Be sure to subscribe, leave a 5-star review, and check the show notes for related resources and links.
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00:00 - Intro to the Episode
01:44 - About Our Guest
02:29 - Start of the Episode
04:28 - Josh Confronts Whitney
06:28 - The Impact on Us
09:45 - Self-of-Therapist
16:30 - Strong Women
17:48 - Brene Brown
19:50 - The Weight We Carry
25:25 - Vicarious Trauma
30:59 - Whitney's Closing Thoughts
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For more information about our guest and the services she offers, you can visit her website at https://www.warrenalexandergroup.com.
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White Horse Phenomenon - Brene Brown - https://youtu.be/0Wu0lp8LH3c?si=CWfHpgsGkEZEs5kU
Vicarious Trauma - https://health.clevelandclinic.org/vicarious-trauma
Compassion Fatigue - https://www.growthtactics.net/what-are-the-5-stages-of-compassion-fatigue
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To learn more about our services or to access more valuable content, please visit our linktree - https://linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
Ever wonder what really catches a therapist’s eye—or ear—during a session? It’s not always the words you’re saying, but how you say them, what your body does, or the deeper patterns you may not even notice. In this episode of Therapists’ Take, we dive into the subtle but powerful signals that guide us as clinicians. From repeated themes to emotional tone to the moment a client says something “small” that’s actually huge—we’ll talk about how we tune into what truly matters.
If you’ve been curious about what therapists notice and why it sometimes feels like we’re reading between the lines, this conversation offers a behind-the-scenes look at how therapy actually works.
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00:00 - Hi, Carrie! (Intro)
03:03 - Processes & Patterns
06:32 - Body Language
11:00 - Incongruencies
15:56 - Resistance
20:32 - Buzz Words (BW)
21:38 - BW1: Governing Rules
23:25 - BW2: Dichotomous Thinking
24:22 - BW3: Winning/Losing
28:26 - BW4: Hierarchical Language
30:58 - BW5: The Point
35:19 - In Closing
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Books from this Episode:
Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl - https://amzn.to/3RShtLi
As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.
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🎧 Want more? Check out all our resources and links at: https://www.linktr.ee/faimlysolutionsok
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Fair Use Disclaimer:
This podcast episode includes a very brief audio clip (1–2 seconds) from the film Friday (1995), directed by F. Gary Gray and written by Ice Cube and DJ Pooh. The clip is used in a comedic and transformative context as a cultural reference and not for commercial exploitation.
We believe this usage qualifies as Fair Use under Section 107 of the U.S. Copyright Act, which allows limited use of copyrighted material for purposes such as parody, comment, and transformative expression.
No copyright infringement is intended. All rights to the original film and its content remain with their respective copyright holders.
🔗 Friday (1995) on IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0113118/
🎬 Directed by: F. Gary Gray
✍️ Written by: Ice Cube and DJ Pooh
🎥 Distributed by: New Line Cinema
Ever wonder what’s really going through a therapist’s mind during a session? In this listener-inspired episode of Therapists’ Take, we invite you behind the scenes to explore the internal world of the therapist. When a client begins to speak, the work starts—not just in listening, but in engaging a complex, intentional process rooted in empathy, observation, and analysis.
Therapists are constantly tuning into body language, emotional tone, and story patterns while forming and revising working hypotheses on the fly. We’ll talk about how we make sense of what’s being said—and what’s not—as well as how our own emotional reactions play a crucial role in the therapeutic process. If you’ve ever been curious about the quiet mental mechanics of a therapy session, you won’t want to miss this episode.
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00:00 - Hi, Carrie! (Intro)
02:46 - Thing 1: Hypothesizing
09:17 - Thing 2: Compassion & Curiosity
13:45 - Thing 3: Body Language
22:29 - Thing 4: Differences that Make a Difference
28:27 - Thing 5: Therapist Emotion
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Check out the following episodes mentioned:
- The 3 Channels of Self-Awareness - https://youtube.com/live/n_psQU9kcgg?feature=share
- Five Things Therapists Wished You Knew - https://youtube.com/live/_zRx19AA4AA?feature=share
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For more great content, please visit our linktree at https://linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
Ever wonder what therapists are actually like when we’re not in session? In this fun and more personal episode of Therapists’ Take, we’re giving you a peek behind the scenes—sharing five things we wish more people knew about us outside the therapy chair.
We’re talking about everything from the myth that we’re constantly analyzing everyone (promise, we’re not… usually) to the reality that many of us are regulars in the client seat too. Expect laughter, a little vulnerability, and some unexpected truths—like our love for Netflix, moments when the "therapist voice" creeps into casual conversations, and why we definitely don’t have it all figured out.
Whether you're a fellow mental health professional, a curious client, or just someone interested in the human side of therapy, this episode is full of humor, heart, and real talk from the other side of the couch.
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00:16 - Hi, Carrie!
01:55 - "Do we talk slow?"
02:54 - Thing 1
06:22 - Thing 2
11:40 - Thing 3
15:08 - Thing 4
18:10 - Thing 5
24:40 - Fun w/ Words
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Great Book
Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb - https://amzn.to/4jAerXM
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For more great content or to find services we offer, please visit our LinkTree at https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
Do you know what forest baths or blue spaces are? Have you ever heard of wild swimming? Did you know that nature itself can help regulate your mood, improve sleep, and support trauma recovery? 🌊🌲
In this episode of the Therapists’ Take Podcast, we’re joined by Dr. Kelly Roberts to explore the incredible healing power of nature. 🌿✨
From forest bathing to wild swimming, Dr. Roberts walks us through how reconnecting with the natural world can help regulate our circadian rhythm, improve mental clarity, and even support trauma recovery. You’ll learn about the benefits of blue spaces, the calming effects of tree oils, and how simply being in nature can ground the nervous system and promote whole-person healing.
Whether you're a mental health professional or someone seeking holistic tools for wellness, this episode offers practical insights and inspiring science behind nature's therapeutic influence.
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Chapters:
00:37 - Hi, Carrie!
01:41 - Episode Breakdown
02:13 - Guest Introduction | Dr. Kelly Roberts
03:44 - The Facebook Post
04:22 - The Science
06:00 - "We are little sunflowers!"
07:25 - Forests
14:12 - Water
17:25 - Gardening
19:30 - Fire
20:34 - Nature & Healing
23:48 - Challenges of the Digital Age
28:03 - Baseball Story
31:24 - Relational Benefits Offered by Nature
35:24 - Closing: Trick Question
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About Our Guest: Dr. Kelly Roberts
Dr. Kelly M. Roberts is a licensed marital and family therapist and was instrumental in launching the Marriage and Family Therapy graduate program at Oklahoma Christian University in 2022. Dr. Roberts served as the Chair of Graduate Programs in Human Sciences and Director of the Marriage and Family Therapy Program at Oklahoma Christian University (OC) but has recently passed the baton and moved to a different role at the university.
With over two decades of experience in clinical practice, research, teaching, and policy advocacy, in addition to being a licensed practitioner, Dr. Roberts is an Approved Supervisor with the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT). Her academic journey includes a Master of Science in Family Relations and Child Development, specializing in Marriage and Family Therapy, and a Ph.D. in Human Sciences with a focus on Family Policy, both from Oklahoma State University.
Dr. Roberts has held various leadership roles, including serving as President and Legislative Liaison of the Oklahoma Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (OKAMFT). She currently contributes as a family policy and advocacy leader for the AAMFT's "Family Therapists in Medical Settings" interest network and is a member of the AAMFT Judicial Committee. Her professional affiliations extend to the National Council on Family Relations (NCFR), the Society for Teachers of Family Medicine (STFM), and the Society for Clinical Trials (SCT).
In recognition of her significant contributions to the field, Dr. Roberts was inducted into the Oklahoma State University College of Education and Human Sciences Hall of Fame.
Beyond her professional endeavors, Dr. Roberts has been married for 39 years and has two daughters.
Follow Dr. Roberts on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/reddirtkelly
Read her blog - https://reddirtchronicles.com
See her profile page - https://www.oc.edu/directory/kelly-roberts
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Resources:
I heard There Was a Secret Chord by Daniel J. Levitin - https://amzn.to/3RH8jkw
Therapist's Take on "Are Newbie Therapists Worth It?" with Dr. Kelly Roberts - https://www.youtube.com/live/3X4CX91mWNg?si=Tm6C_0HQL_yG03lP
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For more great content, visit our LinkTree - https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
In this episode of Therapists' Take, we dive into the concept of taking the one-down position in betrayal trauma couple recovery. After betrayal, the partner who caused harm often struggles with defensiveness, shame, or minimizing their actions. However, true healing requires a shift toward humility, accountability, and emotional attunement. The one-down position is not about self-degradation—it’s about owning the harm, prioritizing the injured partner’s healing, and rebuilding trust through consistent actions.
We’ll explore how this approach plays out in real-world relationships and address the common challenges that arise, including power imbalances and the betrayed partner’s need for validation. Whether you’re a therapist helping couples or someone on a personal healing journey, this episode offers essential insights into how the one-down position contributes to deep relational healing and lasting change.
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00:00 - Introduction
01:00 - Hi, Carrie!
02:15 - Episode Breakdown
03:04 - New Workbook
06:42 - What Is the One-Down Position?
16:00 - The Danger of Defensiveness
4:33 - The Power of Imbalance
32:24 - Rebalancing Power
37:55 - Conclusion
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Books & Links
"Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity after Infidelity" by Dr Shirley Glass - https://amzn.to/3XKDZcn
"Forgiving the Devil" by Terry Hargrave - https://amzn.to/4cfF1mq
Episode on Authenticity - https://www.youtube.com/live/48vTHXudO-s?si=PYl_zyrjDPz7MCdX
Video on One-Down Position - https://youtu.be/1nG3l9oecFE?si=avU1SGrLW8uVp6L0
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Our ONLINE STORE is coming soon! In the meantime, to get a copy of our workbook, The Plan for Peace of Mind: The Betrayed Partner's Guide to Healing Following the Discovery of Infidelity, email us at therapy@familysolutionsok.com.
In this episode of Therapists' Take, we dive into the controversial and often painful topic of betrayal through secret pornography use. Is it a form of infidelity? How does it compare to physical affairs? While some see pornography as a private, harmless activity, others view it as a deep violation of trust. We’ll explore the emotional and relational impact, the complexities of secrecy, and the evolving challenges of digital intimacy in today’s world.
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Key Discussion Points:
🔹 03:30 - Is Secret Porn Use a Betrayal? – Examining different perspectives on trust, emotional impact, and whether secrecy itself constitutes infidelity.
🔹 08:50 - Porn vs. Physical Infidelity – Understanding the psychological and relational differences (and overlaps) between pornography use and in-person affairs.
🔹 15:00 - The Gray Areas in Relationships – What happens when couples have different expectations about pornography, and how can they navigate these differences?
🔹 24:54 - Transparency in the Digital Age – How can partners foster honesty, set boundaries, and adapt to a world where online sexual content is more accessible than ever?
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Book: Always Turned On by Rob Weiss - https://amzn.to/4hBnarm
Book: Pornland by Gail Dines - https://amzn.to/4iAUHmT
Book: Your Brain on Porn by Gary Wilson - https://amzn.to/4iFLAS0
Book: Wired for Intimacy by William Struthers - https://amzn.to/4lbJlaL
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👉 For more great content, visit our LinkTree: https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
In this episode of Therapists' Take, we welcome back polygraph examiner David Otwell to explore a critical aspect of the polygraph process—how to properly prepare for a polygraph and the importance of managing doubt. For many couples navigating betrayal trauma recovery, polygraph exams are often desired and sought after as a tool to aid in creating transparency and rebuilding trust, yet many approach the process with fear and uncertainty. Concerns about nerves impacting results, the weight of past deception, and doubts about polygraph accuracy can all add to the stress. In this follow-up episode, David breaks down some of the psychological barriers and offers practical steps necessary to approach a polygraph with confidence and clarity, better ensuring that the process serves its intended purpose of fostering healing and accountability in relationships.
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00:00 - Introduction
00:54 - Hi, Carrie!
02:38 - Episode Breakdown
04:45 - The Polygraph Examiner
05:24 - 1. The Role of Doubt
13:10 - How Therapists Can Help
18:07 - 2. Benefits of Written Disclosures
21:28 - 3. Impending Doom Doubt
30:20 - The Queen of Cuba
33:15 - Doubting the Exam Itself
39:25 - Final Messages
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About Our Guest: David Otwell
We are honored to welcome David Otwell to this episode of Therapists' Take. David is the owner and operator of Truth Verification Polygraph Services, based in Edmond, Oklahoma. With an impressive 34-year career in law enforcement, David has served in local, state, and federal positions, including as a task force officer with the FBI's Oklahoma City Division, where he investigated national security matters.
After retiring from law enforcement in May 2023, David transitioned full-time into his well-established polygraph business. Trained by the legendary Cleve Backster of the Backster School of Lie Detection, David has conducted nearly 3,000 polygraph examinations, serving law enforcement agencies, fire departments, attorneys, district attorneys, counselors, and private citizens. He has also testified as an expert witness in court regarding polygraphs.
David is deeply involved in the polygraph community, holding memberships in the Oklahoma Polygraph Association, the American Polygraph Association, and the Association of Police Polygraphists. His expertise and dedication have earned him two appointments to the Oklahoma Polygraph Examiners Board—first by Governor Mary Fallin in 2016 and again by Governor Kevin Stitt in 2023, where he currently serves as vice-chair.David’s unparalleled experience and passion for truth verification make him the perfect guest to discuss the myths, science, and future of polygraph exams, particularly in the realm of betrayal trauma recovery.
You can read more about David and gather valuable information and resources from his website – https://www.truthpolygraph.com
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Links & Resources
Work with Carrie & Josh’s team at Family Solutions Counseling – https://www.familysolutionsok.com
Find a Betrayal Trauma Therapist Near You - https://iitap.com/page/TherapistDirectory
Episode 44: On Why We Stopped Using Polygraph - https://youtu.be/94Bzl2aEbc0?si=LDD4Ph_Q-Pa69bzo
Episode 47: On How to Effectively Use a Polygraph as Part of Betrayal Trauma Couples Recovery
American Polygraph Association - https://www.polygraph.org/Stop Sex Addiction Book - https://amzn.to/3CqPGgD
The Queen of Cuba (podcast episode) - https://www.pushkin.fm/podcasts/revisionist-history/the-queen-of-cuba
Talking to Strangers (book) - https://amzn.to/3Di2vdA
Think Again (book) - https://amzn.to/3EPEyed
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For more great content, please visit our LinkTree – https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
Valentine’s Day is often portrayed as the ultimate celebration of love, but for many, it can be a source of stress, disappointment, and even emotional pain. In this episode of Therapists' Take, we explore the dark side of Valentine’s Day, uncovering the hidden pressures, unrealistic expectations, and emotional struggles that often go unspoken. From the loneliness of being single to the strain placed on relationships, we discuss how the holiday can create more anxiety than romance.
We also shine a light on toxic relationship dynamics, including the dangers of love bombing and emotional manipulation disguised as affection. For those who have experienced heartbreak, betrayal, or grief, Valentine’s Day can be a painful reminder of loss rather than a celebration of love. Join us as we take a deep dive into the complex emotions surrounding this holiday and offer insights on how to navigate it in a healthier, more authentic way.
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00:00 - Intro
00:37 - Hi, Carrie!
01:47 - Galentine's/Palentine's Day
03:26 - Episode Breakdown
04:12 - Unnecessary Relational Pressure
09:45 - Unrealistic Expectations & Relational Strain
14:37 - Beware of Love Bombers
21:42 - Grief & Loss
25:53 - Wrapping Up
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For more great content, please check out our LinkTree - https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
In this episode of Therapists' Take, we dive into Webster’s 2024 Word of the Year – Polarization and explore its impact on both mental and relational health. While polarization is often discussed in political and societal contexts, it also affects our personal lives, shaping the way we think, feel, and connect with others.
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00:00 - Intro
00:49 - Hi, Carrie!
01:24 - Words of the Past
04:59 - Episode Breakdown
07:13 - Defining Polarization
11:40 - Impact on Mental Health
12:42 - Impact on Relational Health
15:44 - Any Benefits to Polarization?
8 TIPS FOR NAVIGATING POLARIZATION
25:22 - Tip 1
28:48 - Tip 2
31:23 - Tip 3
33:42 - Tip 4
35:18 - Tip 5
37:59 - Tip 6
40:15 - Tip 7
41:47 - Tip 8
43:25 - Final Thoughts
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Episode Breakdown:
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Therapists' Take Episodes Mentioned
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Books::
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For more great content, please check out our LinkTree - https://www.linktr.ee/familysolutionsok
In this episode of Therapists' Take, we explore the growing phenomenon of climate anxiety and how therapy can offer hope and healing in the face of environmental uncertainty.
Mary Scruggs of Family Solutions Counseling joins us to discuss the emotional toll of climate change and share strategies for managing eco-anxiety.
We’ll cover key aspects of this timely issue, including understanding climate anxiety, the impact of environmental stress on mental health, therapeutic tools to address eco-distress, and how to foster hope and resilience in uncertain times.
Whether you’re personally feeling the weight of climate anxiety or working to support someone who is, this episode offers insights and practical guidance. ___________ Chapters:
00:00 - Hi, Carrie! (intro)
02:32 - Episode Breakdown
03:25 - Guest Introduction
04:14 - Mary's Personal Journey
07:04 - Facing Uncertainty
09:25 - Defining Climate Anxiety
11:05 - Grief
12:35 - Who It Impacts the Most
15:21 - Alone and Helpless
21:55 - Maneuvering Through the Pain
26:35 - Deeper Issues?
31:10 - LGTBQ+
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About Our Guest: Mary Scruggs, LMFT, CPTT
Mary Scruggs is a skilled therapist at Family Solutions Counseling in Oklahoma City, specializing in helping individuals and families navigate complex emotional challenges. With a passion for addressing the intersection of mental health and environmental issues, Mary brings valuable expertise to the growing field of climate anxiety. Her compassionate approach focuses on fostering resilience, managing eco-stress, and empowering clients to find hope and balance in uncertain times.
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Mary’s Profile Page: https://www.familysolutionsok.com/mary-scruggs
Mary’s LinkTree: https://www.linktr.ee/youranxioustherapist_okc
Mary’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/youranxioustherapist_okc
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Resources:
Website: Https://climatepsychology.us
Book: Generational Dread: Findng Purpose in an Age of Climate Anxiety by Britt Wray - https://amzn.to/3Wx2Lfm
Book: Climate Change for Babies - https://amzn.to/4axH5Wd
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