On this episode of The Way, Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan join in on the ongoing debate of cutting weight classes from high school wrestling to prevent forfeits and reduce the number of teams who compete with semi-empty rosters. While some favor cutting the lighter weights, Dernlan and Kolat explain why that could be catastrophic to the sport and suggest their own solution.

On this episode of The Way, Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss ways to improve while we experience time off from wrestling, and debunk the excuses that exist for not making progress.

On this episode of The Way, Matt Dernlan and Cary Kolat react to the postponement of the Tokyo Olympics from this July to the summer of 2021. Kolat, an Olympian who competed at the Sydney Games in 2000, reflects on his own adversity at the Games and predicts what the prospective athletes representing the United States are thinking and feeling.

On this episode of The Way, Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss the intricacies and strategies behind getting college athletes to be able to peak correctly through their competition season. Kolat brings a unique perspective as his first recruiting class as a coach in Campbell are now Seniors and his strategy for getting his athletes to peak has changed over the course of his career. The two discuss the importance of balancing the mental and physical aspects of helping athletes to peak in the critical moment, along with the value in trusting the system and not making drastic changes near the end of the year.

On this episode of The Way, Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss the reasons behind what is commonly referred to as the “Sophomore Slump” when it comes to Collegiate Wrestling. With both having competitive and coaching backgrounds they bring insight into the potential causes and solutions to what causes athletes to feel a lack of development or excitement after they make it past their Freshman year of competition and don’t immediately experience a continued high level of success.

On this episode of The Way, Matt Dernlan and Cary Kolat weigh in on the topic of realistic goals and dreams for athletes during competition. With both having a deep background in coaching they discuss the caveats of keeping it honest with your athletes about what goals are realistically achievable while also giving them the opportunity to put in the work and dream big enough to accomplish something great

On this episode of The Way Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss the problems that come up as coaches when you're a third of the way through the season and issues of rest and recovery come to the surface. Kolat stresses the need for athletes to have perspective on the lucky position that they have while also valuing the importance of resting and recovering outside of the practice room.

On this episode of The Way, Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss the struggles and variables that come along with traveling for competition and how to deal with them in order to perform at the highest level possible while on the road. Cary pulls insight from his experience coaching at Campbell University through competition in the early 2019 season as well as from his experience as a college and senior-level competitor himself.

On this episode of The Way, Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss the current state of officiating in college-level wrestling. Both agree that officials are held to unreasonably high expectations in relation to their compensation for working wrestling meets, and that fans harassing officials for missed calls leads to officials leaving the sport. Kolat and Dernlan emphasize that officials are often working as a service because the pay is so low and they often have to cover their own travel and lodging expenses, and the way to draw more high level officiating to the sport is to increase the pay scale for officials. The two wrap up their discussion by explaining that coaches should take the time to understand how an official is going to call a match so that they can best serve their team and avoid butting heads with an official unnecessarily.

On this episode of The Way, Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss what the best ways of coaching from your athlete’s corner during competition are. The two begin by discussing the process of wrestle off’s and how to determine starters and move into talking about their preferred methods of coaching from the corner as well as how to deal with officials and questionable calls during a match or tournament.

On this episode of The Way, Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss the benefits and requirements for having “On Your Own” workouts in the wrestling room. With their combined coaching experience the two talk about how the sign of a healthy program and healthy team is when the athletes are able to not only believe in the program but take the reins and know what work they need to put in independently of coaching.

On this episode of The Way, Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan divert from their traditional format of the podcast and dive into the concept of discipline in the wrestling room from the perspective of their combined years of experience as both athletes and coaches of top tier wrestling programs.

The two break down how the concepts of discipline in the sport has changed from the time that they were actively competing, as well as discuss ways that they practically applied discipline during their time as coaches, weighing the benefits and downfalls of certain methods.

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Protection From Above
Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan introduce a new book they will be discussing, Leaders Eat Last: Why Some Teams Pull Together and Others Don't, by Simon Sinek. In this episode they discuss Ch. 1 "Protection from Above". Throughout the chapter Sinek utilizes examples from military combat to teach in clear terms of life and death, but shows that the same principles can be put to use in all of life, especially in leading a team.

Kolat and Dernlan reflect on the idea that the best teams come about as leaders build respectful relationships with those under them and put the welfare of their athletes above their own in order to build trust. They also discuss the importance of relying on their senior athletes to act as the "managers" of the team in order to help lead their younger teammates on a smaller level. Kolat finishes by emphasizing the importance of empathy in leadership. He relies on more experienced seniors to lead and push the younger athletes but stresses the importance of not forgetting where they started and to help the next athletes in line to maintain a cohesive, united team.

You Will Always Regret it
This episode Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss Ch. 10 “Never Ever Quit” from the book Make Your Bed: Little Things That Can Change Your Life…And Maybe the World by Admiral William H. McRaven. This chapter talks about not giving up on your dreams and having the fortitude to stick to the process. Refusing to give up and standing tall against the odds makes life what you make of it. Kolat talks about the part in the book during SEAL training where the drill instructor tells the trainees if they quit now they will live with that regret forever. Kolat thinks this is a powerful statement and one many people don't bring up when motivating others to not give up.

Bear the Burden on Your Own (2:34)
Being self-sufficient is crucial. Kolat talks about how he prepped for competitions and what he took with him so even if no one had Gatorade/snacks or dry clothes for him he was prepared. When you do get help it's a welcomed relief but you have to be mentally and physically prepared for life. Dernlan talks about the role wrestling plays in teaching kids self-reliance. In a day and age of helicopter parents watching and fixing every problem or lawnmower parents knocking down obstacles in their children's way it's no wonder, kids haven't learned to be self-sufficient. This ties back to essentially teaching kids to quit. Instead of allowing them to figure it out all they have to do is step back and allow the parents/teachers/adults to fix all problems. This is not to be confused with abandoning or not helping but rather it's leading.Be

Brutally Honest with Yourself First (11:34)
Kolat and Dernlan break down the role of a coach specifically a college coach preparing their athletes for the rest of their lives. While coaching one of Dernlan's priorities was to prepare kids for the non-cushioned real life after college. If he could get them to hold themselves to a high standard with a strong sense of self-honesty he knew they would be successful.

The Harsh Reality
This episode Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss Ch. 8 “Rise to the Occasion” and Ch. 9 "Give People Hope" from the book Make Your Bed: Little Things That Can Change Your Life…And Maybe the World by Admiral William H. McRaven. Ch. 8 deals a lot with giving respect to those soldiers who don't make it home, the realities of war, and the true dangers involved. Kolat and Dernlan don't entertain the idea that this is comparable to wrestling. They move on to Ch. 9 that covers a topic many people are fascinated with when it comes to SEAL training, Hell Week. Kolat relays what some of his SEAL friends have told him about Hell Week and that is that Hell Week is actually not the hardest part of BUD/S but getting through the entire 6 months of being wet, cold, and sandy is. 

Hell Week (8:50)
Dernlan talks about how wrestling programs draw from the idea of a "Hell Week". You have to make sure the athlete understands what they're getting into entering a collegiate program right away. The worst thing for both the program and the individual would be if they had a false reality of what they were getting into and end up quitting. Everyone's going to question if going through this is really worth it, or if they're getting out what they're putting in but that's normal. Dernlan would remind his athletes this and tell his team to lift up their teammates when they're on the edge or ready to give up. Admiral McRaven talks about how it only takes one individual to be the change in everyone's attitude, morale, and motivation. This is true in wrestling as well. Kolat says one guy becoming a national champ can motivate the entire program to be great and achieve their goals. It also only takes one guy to quit to allow others to rationalize in their head to quit.

You're Always Under Attack (17:20)
Kolat speaks on how you're always going to be mentally tested. Who you surround yourself with is extremely important. If you're serious about your goals surrounding yourself with like-minded individuals is crucial for your success.

Lean into Discomfort
This episode Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss Ch. 7 “Stand Up to the Bullies” from the book Make Your Bed: Little Things That Can Change Your Life…And Maybe the World by Admiral William H. McRaven. This chapter goes over standing up and overcoming adversity. Not only reacting and learning from tough situations but really leaning into discomfort in order to grow. Kolat says, if you want to get stronger you lift weights and the only way to improve is to put more weight on the bar. Once that new number becomes easy you have to put more weight on. The same process applies to wrestling. In order to get comfortable in a wrestling position, you have to put yourself in it enough times until you harness the technique and understand what to do enough to be comfortable there. Then you move on to the next area you’re not comfortable in.

Seek out the Bully (3:00)
Dernlan and Kolat talk about the idea of bullying yourself and creating bully situations. What they mean by this is pushing yourself to and past your conceived limits. Not allowing yourself to settle for mediocracy and ultimately achieving the goal you’re working toward. Admiral McRaven talks about during training they would swim in shark-infested waters. It’s a real-life scenario of literally seeking out and swimming with the sharks (your fears or bullies), not backing down, and overcoming. Kolat talks about the teaching moment for parents when your child is bullied. Bullying is a fact of life that is as old as time but it’s also an opportunity to learn, improve, and get stronger. The life lesson you’re teaching is the power in standing up for yourself. Overcoming bullies is something people deal with their whole lives and learning early on how to handle them is important.

Getting Bullied on the Mat (10:55)
Kolat uses his experience at a recent event as an example. A friend’s son was being bullied on the mat. Kolat’s advice for him was that part of wrestling is not allowing that to happen. When it does you come back and show your opponent you won’t allow it and return the favor. A part of wrestling is not only physically but also mentally dominating your opponent. Going through these tough matches is how you get stronger and learn how to not let it happen again.

Be an Overcomer (15:00)
Just as there are physical bullies there are metaphysical bullies surrounding us every day. The more we lean into the discomfort in them and learn to overcome the better we’ll become as people. Do Dernlan and Kolat approve of bullying? No. What they do approve of is standing up and the learning from those situations. They will ascend you to greatness.

Great Wrestlers Dare Greatly
This episode Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss Ch. 6 “You Must Dare Greatly” from the book Make Your Bed: Little Things That Can Change Your Life…And Maybe the World by Admiral William H. McRaven. This chapter talks about pushing your limits, taking risks, believing and going out and executing on your goals and dreams because if you never take the leap you'll never know what's possible. Kolat says one attribute that he doesn't like in a coach is one that steers his athletes away from "high-risk techniques" when that athlete has found success there before. When Kolat was competing he had the ability to learn technique quickly and also had the confidence to try it out in competition. Kolat says there is no such thing as a bad move if you've put in the reps and practice and there's no hesitation or doubt in competition.

Two Things Everyone Can Control (8:55)
It's easy to say what you want but it's difficult to really commit to it. It's hard to commit because there's a risk you won't reach that final goal. Dernlan explains something he would tell all his athletes, "You can't control your natural given talent but you can control your effort and attitude." If you're controlling your effort and attitude every day you'll be prepared and have the freedom to take the risk when the moment arrives. A coach will not begrudge you or be upset if you put in the effort and keep a positive attitude.

Make Mistakes. Be Vulnerable. It's Good for You (12:13)
The time to be daring first is in the practice room. Some athletes fall victim to practicing safely and not allowing themselves to fail therefore not growing and learning. Dare in practice and it'll come out when it matters in competition. vulnerability turns into comfort which turns into confidence which turns into execution. You don't take a loss as a failure you should look at it as an opportunity to learn and improve.

It's All About Perspective
This episode Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss Ch. 5 "Failure Can Make You Stronger" from the book Make Your Bed: Little Things That Can Change Your Life...And Maybe the World by Admiral William H. McRaven. This chapter talks about persevering through failures and allowing those moments to teach you and strengthen you. Dernlan starts by asking Kolat how about his summer training at Campbell and how it's developed from his first few seasons there. Dernlan points out there are a lot of parallels between learning from failure and running a wrestling program. During SEAL training, they have something called "Circus" where people who came in last during the different training they did throughout the day had an extra few hours of training. Admiral McRaven was consistently in the back of the pack and was forced to do extra training. By the end that extra training made him one of the best swimmers. Kolat breaks down and relates this to a coach and athlete relationship. You have a choice between viewing a coach pushing you as a punishment and develop a bad relationship or you can understand the necessity and reasoning to get you better. The only way to improve is to spend extra time and it comes down to the perspective you decide to take.

Put in the Work (10:08)
Kolat talks about the people who are afraid to put it on the line and fail or lose a match. You can't enter a competition with the fear of losing. The athletes who don't put the extra time in are the ones with the highest anxiety entering a match. If you know you put in the work you can have full confidence stepping on the mat knowing you did everything you could to prepare. Dernlan brings up the fact that if you're focusing on doing everything you can do that's recognized by everyone in the group. You can't go wrong with the mindset of being the first one in and the last one to leave the practice room.

Failure Is a Product of Long Term Success
This episode Cary Kolat and Matt Dernlan discuss Ch. 4 "Life’s Not Fair. Drive On." from the book Make Your Bed: Little Things That Can Change Your Life...And Maybe the World by Admiral William H. McRaven. This chapter talks about the way you look at life and how you react to adversity and obstacles in your way. It's hard to be confronted with this so directly but it's a reality. Success is built up by a series of failure and struggle that you learn to overcome. This is why you need to learn to embrace failure and truly reflect on those times in order to improve. 

Take a Risk (6:45)
Kolat has always advocated for self-sufficiency. You can't be fully dependent on another person or group and you can't blame them when something doesn't go right. When coaching, Kolat won't discipline a wrestler who is doing everything right by getting good grades and competing his hardest the same as one who is lacking in the classroom and not giving their all on the mat. Kolat talks about life not being fair and uses the example of the workplace rewarding the best. Being forced to take accountability you are going to fail but you'll reap the rewards of learning from those experiences. A good parent and coach have a balance between knowing when to hold someone's hand and when it's better for them to try themselves and learn.

Failure Is Giving Up (15:40)
Navigating his career, Kolat distinguishes the differences between a setback and a failure. If you give up, that's a failure but if you get up and try again or learn for the next time that's a setback. Kolat also discusses reality is everyone is clawing their way to the top and people don't have a problem stepping on you to get there. Where success becomes a real possibility is when you're comfortable being uncomfortable. If you learn how to truly lean into discomfort is when you open up opportunities for success. The last thing Kolat mentions is not giving up doesn't mean you endure discomfort for a week it means you dedicate months and years to the goal you're working towards.