#271: In this episode, Kevin and Sharif explore one of the most elegant parallels in psychiatry — the deep connection between anxiety and depression. Kevin explains how panic disorder can be seen as a phobia of adrenaline, while depression mirrors it as a phobia of adenosine, the brain’s “tiredness” signal. Together, they explore how unwillingness to feel these sensations fuels both disorders, and why willingness—even love—toward the very sensations we resist becomes the key to healing. With striking clarity, Kevin shows how practices like focused work, rhythmic rest, and embracing “good tired” can reverse the spiral of depression and restore energy, meaning, and joy.
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#270: In this episode, Kevin and Sharif explore a bold new way to understand depression—not as a simple chemical imbalance, but as what Kevin calls a “phobia of adenosine.” Drawing on neuroscience and behavioral psychology, Kevin explains how our brains rely on a natural rhythm of intensity and rest, and how losing that rhythm leads to burnout, lethargy, and despair. The discussion connects deep biological mechanisms—adenosine, dopamine, cortisol, and dynorphins—to everyday experiences of tiredness, motivation, and meaning. In this episode, the groundwork has been laid for next week’s episode which will explain how to restore vitality through a rediscovery of “good tired”: meaningful effort and healthy rest.
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#269: Kevin and Sharif dive deep into the true biology and psychology of burnout — not as mere exhaustion, but as “bad tired on steroids.” Kevin explains how chronic threat mode floods the brain with cortisol, amplifying the “type two” tiredness that crushes motivation, focus, and connection. Together, they explore the three engines of vitality — meaning, effort, and attention — showing how burnout arises when these engines fall out of sync. Sharif presses on the dilemma of working hard without seeing results, while Kevin reveals how reconnecting work with love and service can transform fatigue into renewal. It’s a fascinating look at how neuroscience and reframing unite to reignite purpose in daily life.
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#268: Kevin and Sharif unpack why “good tired” and “bad tired” aren’t just degrees of fatigue but two distinct brain states tied to adenosine pathways—and how dopamine (and even caffeine) changes the experience. They translate cutting-edge neuroscience into practical steps you can test today: work from motives of love and service (to protect motivation), structure your day in focused sprints with real breaks (up to ~90 min work / ~15 min reset), and practice mindful unit-tasking to avoid the energy drain of context switching. They also cover what to do if you’re already in “bad tired,” plus break tactics that actually restore you—light, movement, hydration, and brief parasympathetic resets (prayer, mindfulness, a quick call). If marathons and multitasking leave you feeling futile or spent, this conversation shows how to finish the day “good tired” with strong sleep pressure and renewed momentum—and tees up next week’s deep dive on burnout and depression.
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#267: Kevin and Sharif explore how depression connects to “bad tired,” the draining fatigue that comes from poor sleep, chronic stress, or unfinished effort. At the center is one molecule — adenosine — which can make us feel either “good tired” (satisfied, fulfilled) or “bad tired” (blue, demotivated). Kevin unpacks how adenosine builds up in the brain, how sleep and astrocytes clear it, and how simple practices — from morning light, hydration, and exercise to breathing, cold exposure, and creatine — can flip tiredness from despair into satisfaction.
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#266: Overcoming anxiety occurs in three successive stages. In this first installment of a three episode series, we discuss stage one: confronting the trigger of anxiety head-on, embracing the fear. Over time, the trigger will habituate; as you challenge yourself, the fear you experience will gradually diminish. You can then develop a sense of daring, which is the beginning of the second stage, the topic of next week’s episode.
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#265: When a child does something wrong, your first instinct may be justice: to punish them. In this episode, we discuss “No-Drama Discipline,” by Daniel Siegal and Tina Bryson, exploring how to discipline children in a way that builds your bond with them and promotes their moral development. By connecting with your child, helping him or her gain insight into what went wrong, and look for ways to repair and reintegrate, discipline becomes a way of actually deepening your bond with them, rather than a source of friction.
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#264: Difficult situations can feel intolerable. That intolerable feeling is produced by dynorphins and it makes us want to give up and abandon the difficulty we’re facing, whether it’s exercise, a difficult task, time in the sauna, or some small annoyance. But the more we embrace the dynorphin effect — the intolerable feeling — the more we develop a kind of inner strength. And, paradoxically, we end up unleashing a subsequent wave of endorphins, which cause feelings of wellbeing and improved mood. In this episode, we discuss how to harness this effect to grow in ideals and form deeper bonds.
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#263: What do you do when you feel tired? Go back to sleep? Take a nap? Power through? In this episode, we discuss a number of approaches to overcoming tiredness, from tracking your levels of fatigue (not recommended) to changing up your diet. But the ultimate approach draws on all the principles of OptimalWork and will actually help you harness tiredness for increased energy!
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#262: Mindfulness lies at the heart of OptimalWork’s approach. Living your highest ideals means being fully present, fully engaged with reality. Cultivating this habit is the work of mindfulness. But mindfulness rests on a set of apparent contradictions. Foremost among them is this: while mindfulness involves accepting reality as it is, it is often used as a way of achieving personal or behavioral change. In this episode, we discuss this apparent paradox and others, shedding light on the true nature of mindfulness and how to practice it most effectively.
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#261: The two fundamental ways you can relate to challenge are approach and avoidance. Typically, approach leads to a virtuous cycle: the challenge gets easier and more enjoyable over time as you grow in mastery. Avoidance, on the other hand, often leads to a vicious cycle of increasing difficulty and pain. In this episode we further break down approach into three levels — tolerating, accepting, and loving the challenge — to show how to speed up the virtuous cycle and maximize your growth in the process.
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#260: With rising rates of anxiety and depression, some have suggested that managers be trained to provide “mental-health first aid” to employees in distress. In this episode, we discuss the best ways managers can help employees thrive at work, how to help them grow, and how to balance the need to get results from their teams with the ideal of supporting and mentoring them.
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#259: What’s the best way to prevent distractions? Are prevention techniques — like website blockers — effective? In this episode, we discuss different strategies aimed at behavior change. We argue that the source of the most sustainable behavior change is to build self-mastery through right action. By doing this, you’ll be laying the foundations for new predictions by your brain. Over time, it will come along and be no longer a source of friction, but a great help in pursuing meaningful action.Find more at https://OptimalWork.com
#258: Reframing is a practice that developed from cognitive behavioral therapy. It means discovering the opportunity present within a challenge. If you face a challenge that causes anxiety, distraction, or burnout, reframing can help you approach it more effectively. But reframing can do more. It will also help you harmonize the different parts of your life so everything is working in the same direction: toward your highest ideals.
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#257: At the heart of our approach is the practice of a Golden Hour: preparing your mind for a time of work, focusing on one thing, and setting a stop time in advance. Doing a Golden Hour brings the key practices of psychology into your hour of work, so you not only do your best work, but you also practice bringing your highest ideals into your actions, which is the entire goal of OptimalWork. In this episode, we discuss the genesis of the Golden Hour, how to do it well, and some common questions about how to tailor it do different situations.Find more at https://OptimalWork.com
#256: Shame is the emotion we feel when we fear that our failures or weaknesses will become known. This fear can lead us to pursue certain outcomes as defenses — money, success, prestige, etc. — or to shy away from challenges that will expose us. In this episode, we discuss how to experience and accept shame, and why doing so gives us a profound freedom and unlocks the most meaningful forms of growth.
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#255: When people experience cognitive dissonance — that is, a clash between one’s self-concept and reality — they will tend to favor their self-concept, and can rationalize this bias in a process of self-justification. This process can thwart meaningful personal growth. In this episode, we discuss self-justification, how to identify it and how to overcome it — and a clever way to use it to develop deeper bonds.
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#254: It’s a widespread belief that when experiencing negative emotions like anger or frustration, it’s helpful to vent them. In fact, this practice is counterproductive. Studies indicate that when people express negative emotions in this way, far from letting them out, they in fact get more of them. This result is confirmed by a consideration of the neuroscience of perception and appraisal. In this episode, we discuss the origin of the theory of catharsis, why it’s wrong, and what to do instead — and what to do if someone is venting to you.
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#253: In their 2019 book “The Power of Agency,” Paul Napper and Anthony Rao lay out their theory of growth and happiness, which centers on the concept of “agency.” In this episode, we compare their seven principles with OptimalWork’s approach, and show how ideals are essential to true agency.
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#252: Procrastination is something of a mystery. Its costs — decreased quality of work, fraying of bonds with others, increased negative emotions like stress, even negative health effects — are universally acknowledged. Yet procrastination persists — or, put precisely, people persist in procrastinating. In this episode, we discuss the primary cause of procrastination (a reluctance to experience negative emotions like stress or reluctance), how it leads to a vicious cycle of procrastination, and how to overcome it.
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