On this episode, we dive into a Fall Edition of Keep It or Can It, which means it’s time for overpriced corn mazes, questionable fashion choices, and people pretending chili with beans is anything but soup. In this episode, Kyle rants his way through autumn’s biggest offenders: the false promise of pumpkin carving (“three hours for a fruit you just ruined”), the sticky regret of caramel apples, and the chaos of holiday parades where adults crawl for street candy like it’s currency. If you’ve ever run a $50 5K for a free T-shirt, written poetry in a beanie at 68 degrees, or believed that roasting pumpkin seeds would fix anything — this one’s for you.
Then, we find out which candy won the Best Halloween Candy Tournament and which contestant won the bracket challenge!
In this return, learn about the backhanded compliment that Kyle regularly receives regarding the podcast! Then, Kyle explains his descent into narcissism and how it relates to (NA)CP. Then the bulk of the episode, Kyle gives his unsolicited opinion on 64 Halloween candies! There's a tournament coming up, so we explore topics like, which candy would you run into at the grocery store and try to avoid hanging out with? Would dark chocolate have a podcast? Would Twix be a suburban mom with a shih tzu and poorly behaved children? Kyle thinks so and you will too by the time this is over!
This is a tough listen. Get ready for the most self-deprecating episode in the history of podcasts. You voted on our latest “Keep It or Can It” poll on Instagram, so Kyle gives his opinion on anything and everything related to romance, including his own experience that you’ve probably never heard. Buckle up, because it gets awkward. Learn what about the dating lessons you can learn from heart-shaped boxes of chocolate and discount candy the day after Valentine’s Day! Hear about Kyle’s (NA)CP-branded conversation hearts, coming in 2026 that will give you more realistic expectations surrounding dating. There’s so much more about bad pickup lines, dating apps, “Where’s my hug at” guys and the most embarrassing experience of Kyle’s life, so you’ll just have to listen to find out!
We kick off 2025 not with a single rant. Not with a double rant. But with a triple-rant. Christian shoes, feminization of the name "Kyle" and the panic induced by the potential loss of candy corn fuels today's indignance. Then, Kyle takes one last look back at 2024 with his top albums of the year. To close out the show, Kyle takes you all the way back to elementary school with a story that will probably shock you. He's not proud of it but it happened. Please don't cancel me.
Kyle begins this episode by recounting his recent travels, which includes questionable interactions in the Waffle House parking lot, hot dog cars, sprinting through an airport and meeting a childhood hero. For the rest of the episode, goes through his Spotify Wrapped and confirms what we all already know.
This episode starts out with Kyle recounting yet another humbling experience in a public setting. Hear how Kyle's moral superiority led to his latest public downfall. Then, the majority of this episode will be spent going over the bracket for the tournament that never happened, which will henceforth be known as the (Not A) Summer Tournament! Hear about Kyle's opinions on tide pods, fedoras, paper straws and countless other trends. Kyle waxes on about how his ideal childhood would have involved frosted tips and heelies and also how he might have peaked in high school because of plaid shorts.
To start this episode, Kyle rants about subpar mailbox coupons and panic-buying toilet paper any time there’s a national event. Then, Kyle recounts a recent experience that ranks in his top three embarrassing moments of his whole life. It involves appreciating some art a little too much and not knowing when to keep his mouth shut. Then, the bulk of the episode is Kyle doing a very late recap on his summer trip to Montana. It involves planes on fire, driving into not one, but two horror movies, last minute camping reservations and meeting grizzly bears. It’s a wild time.
Welcome back! On this brief installment of (NA)CP, Kyle dabbles in self-congratulatory behavior and makes a promise he vows to keep in every circumstance except for death! All in all, it's just a very brief update on where (NA)CP has been and where (NA)CP is going!
Big things have been happening this year. Kyle learned a new skill and has a major life update to share with the friends of the show. Then, for the bulk of the show, we catch up on some social media polls from the more distant past…. But better late than never. What colors do you associate with different months of the year? Most of you don’t do it at all, so this segment will probably be incoherent rambling. You may have wondered before, what do manila folders and vomit have in common? You’ll finally find your answer on this segment. Then, we fulfill what the internet was created for- determining how Christian certain non-Christian songs actually are. Then, Kyle ends the show with what is perhaps the least surprising recommendation of the week in the history of (NA)CP!
Welcome Back! After a long hiatus, it's good to be back! Kyle starts off talking about trips coming up in the near future and talks about the event that (maybe) served as the catalyst for the comeback episode of (NA)CP! It involves a scooter, a guy getting roasted and a bell-less tower. Then, Kyle uploads a segment that he recorded 6 months ago and just now got around to editing. Oops. Then, to end it, of course we talk about Mat Kearney, because this is (Not A) Christian Podcast.
This episode is all about the upcoming tournament! Join Kyle as he walks through Christmas traditions like matching family pajamas, parades, Krampus, Egg Nog and much more!
Kyle begins this show by telling the story of his latest impulsive purchase and how it affects the recording of the podcast. Then, the long-anticipated results of the Christian Villain Draft are revealed! And 103 episode into this thing, Kyle comes to a disturbing realization that some people may be doing certain... things while listening to the show. Then, since we’re catching up, Kyle updates you on his latest travel adventures where he meets the worst flight attendant he’s ever seen. But it’s okay, because we got content out of it! Then, we revisit Young Earth Creationism, as we (once again) dive into our series on the beginning of time. To end the show, Kyle revisits a childhood staple, but is met with disappointment that he will for sure have nightmares about!
Did anyone else use breath mints and lemon lime drinks to cure all ailments or was that just me? Follow along with Kyle's uninteresting adventure in being sick and pulling out all the elementary school cures! Then, Josh is back for one more episode where we draft our teams of Christian villains! Come and see the most dastardly figures we could contrive in the Bible, Church History, the prosperity realm and more! Who is the King of the Prosperity gospel? Can we name any actual heretics in church history? Also, find out about the gentlemen's agreement that we made to exclude the two figures that were too GOATed to be included in the draft!
Since we talked for way too long in last week's episode, Josh is back for the second installment (of three) of the 100 episode celebration! We begin talking about some adventures our freshman year, including a vampiric professor, a singular snore that still haunts Josh and a sad case of mistaken identity. Next, Josh runs some fact checks on Kyle about past segments of the show- and they turn Kyle's childhood on its head. Then Josh presents Kyle with some out of context (NA)CP quotes and Kyle has no idea what they're about- there was even one too risque to include on the show! Next, Josh digs into his (literal) bag of tricks, which catalyzes what Kyle says may be his favorite moment ever on the show! We bring it to a close with the story of the literal worst roommate ever- so if you have a bad roommate, listen to this episode to make yourself feel better!
For the literal 100th time, welcome back to the show! Today I'm joined by my longtime friend (but only recent friend of the show), Josh Nichols. You don't want to miss the feat of endurance, dedication and absurdity that led to him being the one chosen to share in this momentous episode. We tell a couple of old stories, including the time Josh tried to bamboozle a gas station and a pseudonymous encounter from 11 years ago! We also do a segment looking back on Josh's perception of Kyle's right and (allegedly) wrong opinions. Of course, this leads down a rabbit trail talking about the time Josh tried to conquer one of the world's largest airports on foot and the hilarity and romance (?) that ensued! This episode is packed until the very end as we introduce the next piece of (NA)CP merch and engage in the clumsiest sign-off ever!
This week, Kyle lets you in on some behind-the-scenes info on the recording of (NA)CP! Find out why he hasn't been able to run the air conditioner for the past year while recording the show and how that's all changed! Next, we close out the "Kyle's moving again" Chronicles by talking about the mishaps that happened in the moving process. Kyle reflects on a recent trips and the interesting dynamics that happen on airplanes. We also revisit a year-old plea and petition to be reunited with our favorite fast food breakfast- and it worked! The majority of this show is spent revisiting some largely forgotten worship hits and ranking them in countdown style! Finally, you'll get a hint at who the guest is for next week's episode 100 of (NA)CP!
This is the bracketology episode for the 2023 Summer Tournament! Listen as Kyle gives his picks on which songs will advance in the tournament and which song he thinks will eventually be crowned as the worst song of all time! Of course, we check the Bro Country boxes by talking about trucks, tractors, boots and honky-tonks. Next, it wouldn't be an episode of (NA)CP without some bad opinions, so of course, Kyle actually likes some of these songs. Listen for lyric readings, cringy spoken word segments & nostalgia!
This episodes starts off with an update of Kyle's living situation- and you guessed it- he's moving again. How many times does this make? It's over 20! Then, we revisit some of the more popular segments in the history of (NA)CP- with a twist. We'll just say that Kyle's role as the host of (NA)CP won't be overtaken by robots any time soon. Hear about Kyle's sitcom-like day that includes nothing that's actually funny and the alternate universe version of the weirdest thing that Kyle's ever experienced. Then we talk about the loathsome things like baby talk, dog culture and ungloved hands that you guys submitted to see which one is actually the worst of them all! Finally, the recommendation of the week is proof that Kyle is becoming a granola girl, but he's not upset about it.
This episode begins with Kyle getting caught up with his audience about normal parts of the human condition- like drinking water from paper cones and eating shredded cheese right out of the bag. And while we're on the topic of cheese, Kyle talks about an event that he's been obsessed with for well over a decade- it's also cheese-related. Then, for the rest of the episode, we find out what the general (NA)CP audience likes, loathes or is indifferent to. We cover topics like store-bought tortillas, half-sheet paper towels, Instagram accounts for dogs and getting licked by dogs. And for good measure, Kyle includes a few moments of an ASMR experience for those who have never had the pleasure of hearing it- you don't want to miss this!
