Attachment styles have become a big topic lately, and for good reason. They shape how we love, communicate, and respond in our relationships. In this episode, I’m diving into the five key traits of anxious attachment and how they show up in marriage, especially after kids.
If you’ve ever found yourself overthinking, craving reassurance, or feeling more impacted by emotional distance than your partner, this conversation will help you understand why. I’m sharing personal insights from my own anxious attachment style, what I’ve learned through years of research and client work, and how to begin creating more security, confidence, and peace in your relationship.
Tune in to discover:
• The core fear that drives anxious attachment and how it shows up in marriage
• Why emotional closeness can feel like safety and distance feels so threatening
• How inconsistency and uncertainty fuel anxiety and disconnection
• The link between overthinking, control, and emotional burnout
• How comparison and jealousy often stem from fear rather than fact
The Holiday Connection Challenge: https://marriedafterkids.com/holiday-connection-challege
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Get your FREE EBOOK! 3 Ways To Connect More With Your Spouse (In 5 Min or Less): https://marriedafterkids.com/freebie
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
Marriage shutdown can feel like one of the most painful and confusing places to be. You’re lonely, resentful, and unsure how to fix it, and even the good moments never seem to last. But there’s one specific part of marriage shutdown that truly scares me, and it’s something most couples don’t even realize is happening until it’s already taken hold.
In this episode, I’m breaking down what makes this stage of marriage so dangerous and what you can do to change it. I’ll share personal stories from my own marriage, the psychology behind why our brains look for someone to blame, and the key mindset shift that can help you and your spouse move from disconnection to teamwork again.
Tune in to discover:
• The hidden reason couples stay stuck in marriage shutdown
• Why focusing on your spouse’s flaws keeps you from healing the real issue
• How your brain’s “protective mechanism” can make things worse
• The dynamic I call the “shutdown spiral” and how to identify yours
• What to do instead to rebuild connection and start working as a team again
The Holiday Connection Challenge: https://marriedafterkids.com/holiday-connection-challege
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
So many women are doing everything right, eating well, exercising, managing the mental load, and still feel off. If that’s you, this conversation will be a breath of relief.
In this episode, I’m joined by registered dietitian Dr. Heather Finley to explore how physical health and gut health play a powerful role in how we show up in our marriages. We talk about the often-overlooked ways that depletion, hormones, and stress affect your mood, connection, and ability to feel good in your body, and why finding the right answers can completely change how you relate to yourself and your partner.
If you’ve ever thought, “My labs say I’m fine, but I don’t feel fine,” this episode will help you see that you’re not crazy and that your health and happiness in marriage are deeply connected.
Tune in to discover:
• How gut and hormone health impact your energy, mood, and connection in marriage
• Why so many women feel dismissed by “normal” lab results
• The role of stress, sleep, and mineral depletion in feeling off balance
• How to start the right conversations with your partner about getting support
• Small, foundational shifts that can change how you feel in your body and your relationship
Connect with Heather:
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drheatherfinley
• Website: https://www.guttogetherprogram.com/
• Love Your Gut Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/love-your-gut/id1620578740
• Free Mineral Guide: https://nourish-functional-health.kit.com/mineralguide?utm_source=link+in+bio&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=mineral-ig&utm_id=mineral-ig&utm_term=mineral-ig&utm_content=mineral-ig
• Mineral Testing ($30 off!): https://drheatherfinley.thrivecart.com/htma/?coupon=MARRIEDWITHKIDS
Connect with Lindsay:
• The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
• FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
• Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
• Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
Cancel culture started as a way to hold people accountable, but it’s gone too far. The same mindset that demands perfection online is quietly showing up in our marriages, convincing us that if our spouse messes up, they’re toxic, unfixable, or not worth our time.
In this episode, I’m unpacking how cancel culture’s black-and-white thinking can erode the safety and trust that healthy relationships depend on. We’ll talk about the difference between real dealbreakers and normal human mistakes, why repair is so vital, and what it really takes to grow through the inevitable missteps every couple faces.
Tune in to discover:
• How cancel culture’s “no room for mistakes” mindset seeps into marriage
• Why growth, repair, and nuance matter more than getting it perfect
• How to tell the difference between toxic patterns and normal imperfection
• The role of emotional safety when you and your spouse mess up
• What to focus on to build a marriage that lasts through imperfection and repair
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
If you’ve ever tried to talk to your spouse about the mental load and ended up feeling more frustrated than before, it’s not because you’re doing it wrong. So many couples want to share the load more fairly, but there are hidden barriers that make these conversations stall out or spiral into conflict.
In this episode, I’m breaking down the main reasons why dads often don’t step in, why moms end up carrying it all by default, and what keeps these conversations from moving forward. More importantly, I’ll walk you through how to recognize the specific barriers in your relationship so you can finally shift the dynamic and feel like a team again.
Tune in to discover:
• Why men often don’t recognize the mental load in the first place
• How default “factory settings” after kids leave moms carrying more than their share
• Why asking for help still leaves you holding the invisible weight
• The role of defensiveness in shutting conversations down
• What to focus on instead so you can break the cycle and build more equity at home
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
Sometimes the most powerful shifts in marriage come from hearing what other couples are struggling with (and how they’re working through it). That’s why in this episode, I’m taking you behind the scenes and sharing the exact conversations I’m having with my clients right now.
These are the patterns, perspective shifts, and tools that come up over and over again, no matter what stage of marriage someone is in. From unmet needs to the mental load to feeling stuck in the same cycle, these conversations are the ones that bring the biggest breakthroughs. And today, I want you to benefit from them too.
Tune in to discover:
• Why perspective shifts are one of the most underutilized tools in marriage
• How unmet needs and resentment can keep you stuck in painful cycles
• Why “just talking about it” often isn’t the work, and what actually is
• The importance of having the right tools and systems, not just good intentions
• The top mindset shift I teach my clients that changes everything
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
So many couples struggle with resentment, overwhelm, and burnout after kids, even when both partners are “doing a lot.” My guest today, Paige Connell, has become a powerful voice on the realities of the mental load, time equity, and the systemic stress that weighs families down. Her candid, relatable storytelling has reached millions, and today she’s breaking down how she and her husband shifted from frustration to fairness in their marriage.
In this conversation, we talk about why it’s not just about who does the chores, but how couples view time, money, and responsibility. Paige shares her own journey of redefining equity at home, why small moments like forgetting to refill the soap carry so much weight, and how to start having conversations that actually move the needle in your relationship. If you’ve ever wondered why it feels like everything defaults to you (and how to change that), this episode is a must-listen.
In this episode, you’ll hear:
• How Paige and her husband faced their own reckoning with the mental load
• Why resentment often builds even when both partners are “helping”
• The hidden weight of time equity and how society undervalues unpaid labor
• Practical shifts that turn daily fights into collaborative logistics
• Why creating equity at home frees up space for joy, fun, and a stronger marriage
Connect with Paige:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sheisapaigeturner/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@sheisapaigeturner
Connect with Lindsay:
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
Fair Play has changed the conversation around mental load for so many couples, and it is an incredible starting point. But after using it myself and walking clients through it, I’ve seen that sometimes it doesn’t go as far as we hope, and it can even leave couples feeling stuck or disappointed.
In this episode, I’m sharing where Fair Play shines, the gaps I’ve noticed, and what else needs to be in place for this tool to actually create the change you want. If you’ve ever tried Fair Play and still felt frustrated, unseen, or like something was missing, this conversation will give you the clarity and tools to move forward.
Tune in to discover:
• Why Fair Play was groundbreaking and why I still recommend it
• The most important gap the system leaves out (and why it matters so much)
• How life circumstances like travel or shift work complicate the system
• Why divvying up tasks is only part of what makes marriage work
• What else your marriage needs beyond Fair Play to truly thrive
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
What if the changes you want in your marriage could happen faster than you ever thought possible? Most couples assume that improving their relationship has to take years of work, but that’s not actually true. There’s one shift that can speed things up dramatically, and it might not be what you expect.
In this episode, I share the biggest reason progress often feels painfully slow and the exact mindset and approach that will collapse time and help you see results much more quickly. You’ll hear real-life examples from my own marriage and from clients, plus the key to moving from frustration and disconnection into real, lasting change.
Tune in to discover:
• Why so many couples get stuck spinning their wheels on the wrong issues
• The hidden ways traditional methods slow down progress
• What creates hope and momentum when you feel like nothing is working
• How to get unstuck even if you’ve been in the same cycle for years
• The #1 hack to collapse time and get results faster in your marriage
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
Marriage and motherhood are challenging enough, and when ADHD is in the mix it can feel even more complicated. But a strong, connected marriage is absolutely possible. In this episode, I am joined by Sara Wiles, mom, wife, and business mentor, for an honest conversation about what ADHD looks like in her marriage and parenting, and the strategies that create more balance and connection at home.
We also talk about what it means to build a business that supports your life instead of the other way around. Sara’s openness about marriage, motherhood, and entrepreneurship is a breath of fresh air for anyone who has ever felt “too much,” “not enough,” or simply wired differently in their relationship.
Tune in to discover:
• Why marriage after kids feels like building the plane while flying it
• The role of repair in relationships and why it matters more than getting it perfect
• How ADHD shows up in both business and marriage and how to make it work for you
• The truth about highlight reels, comparison, and what we don’t see in other people’s marriages
• What it means to build a life-first business (and why it matters for moms and families)
Connect with Sara on Instagram: @sara_wiles
Learn more about becoming a Virtual Assistant: startandgrowco.com
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
If you want to prevent resentment, reduce conflict, and protect your peace as a parent, one of the most powerful skills you can build is setting boundaries.
I know boundaries can feel confusing, even controversial. Maybe they’ve been used against you in the past, or maybe you’ve thought of them as walls or ultimatums. But the truth is, healthy boundaries are what allow you to show up as your best self, feel emotionally safe, and create a marriage that actually feels good after kids.
In this episode, I’m breaking down the exact boundaries that protect your marriage from resentment and burnout, plus how to put them into place in a way that feels kind, loving, and effective.
Tune in to discover:
• What we so often get wrong about boundaries
• The 5 categories of boundaries that matter most for parents (and how to set them)
• How clear boundaries reduce conflict and increase emotional safety in marriage
• The most common mistakes couples make when setting boundaries (and what to do instead)
• How to know where you need a boundary most in your relationship right now
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
Double standards can show up in any marriage, but over time they can quietly erode connection and trust. The tricky part is, they’re not always obvious and sometimes they hide in the everyday routines and unspoken expectations you’ve had for years.
In this episode, I’m breaking down how double standards show up, why they can feel so frustrating (even if you can’t put your finger on exactly why), and what to do if you suspect they’re taking a toll on your relationship.
Tune in to discover:
• How to spot double standards you may not even realize are there
• Why these patterns feel so personal and emotionally charged
• A simple way to talk about them without starting a fight
• What to focus on if the dynamic feels unfair but hard to change
• The shift that can help you feel like you’re on the same team again
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
There’s one sneaky force behind so many disconnections in marriage, and most couples don’t even realize it’s happening until they’re deep in resentment, withdrawal, or feeling like roommates.
In today’s episode, I’m breaking down the hidden link between the mental load and marriage shutdown, and why it’s about so much more than just who does the dishes. I’ll walk you through the three layers of mental load, the emotional toll it takes (especially on moms), and the subtle but powerful ways it impacts connection, intimacy, and teamwork.
Whether your spouse “helps” or not, this episode will help you understand why it still feels like too much and what to do about it.
Tune in to discover:
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
You may have heard the headlines: men are doing more housework than ever before. Sounds like great news, right?
But in this episode, I’m breaking down why this seemingly positive trend can actually be really harmful for moms, and the very important piece that’s missing from the conversation. If you’ve ever been told you should feel grateful for your partner’s “help” but still feel unsupported, unseen, or like you’re carrying the mental weight of everything, this one is for you.
I’m sharing personal stories, research, and practical tools to help you move beyond “help” and toward true co-leadership in your home and relationship.
Tune in to discover:
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
That quiet mental tally you keep? The one that says, “I’ve done bedtime three nights in a row” or “I handled the birthday party and the laundry and the grocery run”… that’s called scorekeeping. And while it might feel totally justified, it’s also slowly eroding the connection in your marriage.
In this episode, I’m diving into where scorekeeping comes from, why it shows up so often after kids, and what it actually does to the trust and emotional safety in your relationship. Most importantly, I’ll show you what to do instead so you can get more of what you need without falling into the resentment spiral.
Tune in to discover:
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
There’s one tool that shows your spouse you care about how they feel, helps rebuild trust, and creates the kind of emotional safety every strong relationship needs. And yet, it’s one of the most misunderstood (and misused) tools in marriage.
I’m talking about apology. Not the kind that shuts a conversation down or smooths things over quickly, but the kind that actually brings you closer. Whether you're someone who avoids saying sorry, finds yourself over-apologizing, or just wishes your spouse would do it better, I’m getting into why this skill is so critical for connection and how to use it well.
Tune in to discover:
The Us System: The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
Sometimes the biggest shift in your marriage starts with getting crystal clear on what you actually need—and saying it out loud.
In this special episode, I’m joined by the incredible Elizabeth Newcamp, military spouse, mom of three, and co-host of Slate’s Care and Feeding podcast, for a real, tender, and honest conversation about resentment, default parenting, emotional labor, and what it means to truly feel seen in your relationship.
We talk about the invisible mental load, how resentment shows up even when you want to be a team, and the surprisingly powerful thing Elizabeth did to shift how she and her husband communicate (it gave me chills).
Tune in to discover:
Connect with Elizabeth:
Connect with Lindsay:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
You’ve heard the advice: “Never go to bed angry,” “Happy wife, happy life,” “If it’s hard, you married the wrong person.” But what if I told you that a lot of the messages we’ve been fed about healthy marriages are just plain wrong?
In this episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on the real reasons so many couples feel disconnected or overwhelmed after kids and how these common myths are setting you up to struggle. If your marriage hasn’t felt easy, or you’ve wondered why all the “right” things don’t seem to work, this one is for you.
I’ll walk you through the biggest lies we’ve been told about marriage, why they’re so harmful, and what actually helps create connection, support, and partnership that lasts.
Tune in to discover:
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
Do you ever feel like sharing your feelings with your spouse only leads to defensiveness, frustration, or being completely misunderstood? Like you’re trying to express something real and vulnerable, but instead you end up managing their reaction or feeling more alone than before? You're not broken (and neither is your marriage) but this episode explains exactly what’s getting in the way of the emotional safety and connection you crave.
In this episode, I’ll walk you through one of the most common (and least talked about) dynamics that makes emotional validation feel impossible in marriage, and how you can change it.
Tune in to discover:
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
Real talk: Marriage after kids can feel like one more thing you don’t have time or energy for. Between work, parenting, logistics, and exhaustion, even the thought of improving your marriage can feel overwhelming. But here’s the truth: your marriage doesn’t need more time or money—it needs intention, consistency, and the right tools (even just a few minutes a day can make a huge difference).
In this episode, I’m sharing how to shift your marriage without adding anything more to your plate. You’ll learn exactly how to connect with your spouse in powerful, bite-sized ways that actually fit into your busy life.
Tune in to discover:
FREE Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin
Connect with me for a FREE Married After Kids Intervention Call:
https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call
Follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss a thing! www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
