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If I Speak
Novara Media
88 episodes
2 days ago
Ash Sarkar and Moya Lothian-McLean sort the personal from the political, tackle listener dilemmas and air their opinions on the frustrations of modern life.
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Relationships
Society & Culture
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All content for If I Speak is the property of Novara Media and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
Ash Sarkar and Moya Lothian-McLean sort the personal from the political, tackle listener dilemmas and air their opinions on the frustrations of modern life.
Show more...
Relationships
Society & Culture
Episodes (20/88)
If I Speak
86: Why do we lap up other people’s horror stories?
We’re coming to Manchester! On 25th November we’ll be at Contact Theatre for a live show with special guest Lanre Bakare, author of We Were There. Tickets are available now from the Contact website! This week, Moya and Ash offer a thought for spooky season: why do love hearing other people’s horror stories? Plus: Moya […]
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5 days ago
1 hour 12 minutes 22 seconds

If I Speak
85: Has pop culture turned to slop? w/ Kemi Alemoru
*Display your Special One status with our only piece of merch so far – a bag! Available from shop.novaramedia.com* Moya and Ash are joined by Kemi Alemoru, editorial director of Glamour UK, to analyse the current state of pop culture, from Taylor Swift to A24. Has pop turned to slop? Or is it on us […]
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1 week ago
1 hour 8 minutes 44 seconds

If I Speak
84: How to ace a first date (by two very different daters)
*Flag your Special One status with a massive foldable Baggu bag, available from shop.novaramedia.com* Are you a stranger dater or a fan of the ‘indeterminate hang’? Moya and Ash explain their very different approaches to a first date. Plus: advice for an unhappy house-sharer. Send us your dilemmas: ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt Huxley.
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2 weeks ago
57 minutes 58 seconds

If I Speak
83: Is jealousy the spice of life?
*We’ve got merch! It’s a big foldable bag just for Special Ones, available from shop.novaramedia.com* Prompted by Elena Ferrante’s novel My Brilliant Friend, Ash wonders what makes Moya jealous. Can friendships survive a power imbalance? What happens when YOU are the brilliant friend? And is jealousy a crucial part of desire? Reading: Wounded Attachment by […]
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3 weeks ago
1 hour 5 minutes 3 seconds

If I Speak
82: Help! I can’t stop hating men
*Join the Baggu believers: it’s a huge foldable bag just for Special Ones, available from shop.novaramedia.com* Moya wants to stop hating men and start building trust, which means a dialogue about all the things that make that difficult: objectification, racist over-sexualisation, degrading comments, and rape (TW: 27m; 40m). Send us your dilemmas: ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt […]
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1 month ago
1 hour 9 minutes 56 seconds

If I Speak
81: Is it wrong to love my AI boyfriend?
*We’ve got merch. Gift yourself the If I Speak x Baggu bag, only from shop.novaramedia.com* A mystery question from producer Chal prompts a conversation about secrets in romantic relationships – from watching porn to cheating with an AI boyfriend. Plus: advice for an autistic dater who’s been banned from Hinge. Send us your dilemmas: ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music […]
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1 month ago
45 minutes 35 seconds

If I Speak
80: September is the real new year. Will your resolution stick this time?
*Flag your Special One status with our official tote bag, only from shop.novaramedia.com* Moya has a simple proposition: September is the best month for fresh starts. But why do we always want a clean slate? Plus, a straight white man who’s trying to be good and getting flak for it anyway. Send us your dilemmas: […]
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1 month ago
1 hour 2 minutes 43 seconds

If I Speak
79: Help! I’ve moved back home and now my mum hates me
*Check out the official If I Speak tote bag on shop.novaramedia.com* Moya and Ash tackle your dilemmas, featuring a middle-class mum who’s become distant and critical, an ex-boyfriend who’s blowing hot and cold, a looming holiday with an abuser, a single man wondering where all the single women are hiding, and a twenty-something struggling to […]
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1 month ago
59 minutes 7 seconds

If I Speak
78: What does it take to feel safe?
*Get the If I Speak Baggu bag from shop.novaramedia.com* A shocking real-life incident prompts a conversation about feeling safe, trusting your gut and the politics of public safety. Plus: advice on finding friendship after leaving a conservative religious community. TW: sexual assault (at 43m) Send us your dilemmas: ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt Huxley.
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2 months ago
1 hour 10 minutes 36 seconds

If I Speak
77: What’s the difference between a girl and a woman?
*The If I Speak Baggu bag is ethically made, comes in two colours and is available from shop.novaramedia.com* What would it mean to be valued simply as a woman – not as a mother, wife, caregiver, girlypops or MILF? Ash and Moya talk about their animal natures and fear of motherhood in a chat spurred by […]
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2 months ago
1 hour 2 minutes 1 second

If I Speak
76: How porn went mainstream and changed everything w/ Sophie Gilbert
*Support the show by copping the If I Speak Baggu bag – it’s ethically made, comes in two colours and is available from shop.novaramedia.com* Ash and Moya talk to Sophie Gilbert about the pornification of the ’90s and ’00s – an era when riot grrl gave way to girl power, the supermodel was replaced by […]
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2 months ago
1 hour 17 minutes 32 seconds

If I Speak
75: The world needs more flirting. Here’s how
*Support the show by copping the If I Speak Baggu bag – it’s ethically made, comes in two colours and is available from shop.novaramedia.com* Moya and Ash tackle a topic that turns up in the If I Speak mailbox every week: how can we get better at flirting IRL – and coping with rejection? Plus, how […]
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2 months ago
1 hour 11 minutes 22 seconds

If I Speak
74: Can your racial identity change over time?
*Flag your Special One status with the If I Speak Baggu bag – it’s ethically made, comes in two colours and is available now from shop.novaramedia.com* Ash has noticed that neither she nor Moya is white and urgently needs to talk about it. Has her sense of her racial identity changed over time? And where does […]
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2 months ago
1 hour 15 minutes 13 seconds

If I Speak
73: Where did it all go wrong on the dancefloor?
*Flag your Special One status with the If I Speak Baggu bag – it’s ethically made, comes in two colours and is available now from shop.novaramedia.com* Having rekindled her appetite for fun, Ash now has a five-point plan to improve dancefloors. Plus, advice for a special one whose boyfriend isn’t weird or jealous – and that’s the […]
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3 months ago
1 hour 7 minutes 59 seconds

If I Speak
72: Why does it always have to be me taking responsibility?
*We’ve got merch! The If I Speak Baggu bag is ethically made, comes in two colours and is available now from shop.novaramedia.com* Ash and Moya descend into the guilt vortex for a conversation about family, responsibility, and parents who need to be parented. Plus: advice for a special one with a workplace crush. Send us […]
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3 months ago
1 hour 7 minutes 20 seconds

If I Speak
71: If I’m so angry then why am I crying?!
*We’ve got merch! The If I Speak Baggu bag is ethically made, comes in two colours and is available now from shop.novaramedia.com. Support the show and find fellow Special Ones.* On this episode, Moya presents an intrusive thought from a Special One about why some women struggle to express their anger. Should our ‘outlaw emotions’ […]
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4 months ago
1 hour 12 seconds

If I Speak
70: Can you ever change what you want?
*We’ve got merch! The If I Speak Baggu is ethically made, comes in two colours and is available now from shop.novaramedia.com. Support the show and send a signal to fellow Special Ones.* In this episode, Moya and Ash talk about what to do with their impossible desires. Plus: Britain’s drinking problems, and and advice for […]
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4 months ago
1 hour 10 minutes 33 seconds

If I Speak
69: Is marriage a hard border? w/ Jeremy Atherton Lin
Is marriage like an island, or more of an open house? Ash talks about state-sanctioned relationships with memoirist Jeremy Atherton Lin, whose new book Deep House: The Gayest Love Story Ever Told, is out now. Plus, advice for a listener whose money worries aren’t shared by her partner. Are you in big trouble? Send us […]
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4 months ago
1 hour 39 seconds

If I Speak
68: Help! My housemate is a pig
Moya and Ash deal with your dilemmas, including a daughter who wants to give away her inheritance, a scared mum facing up to her prejudice, a singleton wondering if moving home was a mistake, and a renter whose housemate is a total pig. Are you in big trouble? Email us: ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt Huxley.
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4 months ago
1 hour 10 minutes 2 seconds

If I Speak
67: What’s up with Generation Alpha?
Moya and Ash wonder what’s up with kids these days, thinking about parenting, advertising, social media and anxiety. Plus, advice for a bereaved listener who’s furious with her stepmum. Send your dilemmas to ifispeak@novaramedia.com Music by Matt Huxley.
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5 months ago
56 minutes 5 seconds

If I Speak
Ash Sarkar and Moya Lothian-McLean sort the personal from the political, tackle listener dilemmas and air their opinions on the frustrations of modern life.