Send us a text In which I discover a few of my favourite things; Toast is a dick; Mr IKINTST makes some outrageous allegations about me; I come up with an outstanding business proposal; and I Do Some Gardening.

Send us a textIn which Mr IKINTST comes up with the most unattractive metaphors for sex, ever; we discuss Christmas Incidents; Mr IKINTST performs a Christmas miracle; I eat Small Food; and we discuss swinging, and The Correct Way To Do A Supermarket Shop.

Send us a textIn which THERE HAS BEEN A STORM; we discuss pig penises; I break a bath, and have a series of encounters with dodgy men brandishing their tools; and we introduce the concept of Naked Painting.

Send us a textIn which I walk a marathon (did I mention I walked a marathon?!), and talk about it A LOT; Mr IKINTST defies medical science; we rue the demise of flashers; I share one of my many embarrassing drama school memories; and Mr IKINTST is thwarted by a space hopper.

Send us a textIn which Mr IKINTST and I join forces to BRING BACK THE PODCAST. We discuss cats with fetishes, horny tortoises, and quite what Mr IKINTST was up when I found him standing at the end of my bed brandishing a sink plunger one night.......

Send us a textIn which, after an 18 month absence, the podcast comes back!!! We discuss the ever-chaotic state of my desk; the arrival of Toast (the kitten, not the baked goods); my views about cats on beds; Beth's early morning surprise; Jamie turning sixteen; GCSE revision (bring back fronted adverbials, all is forgiven!); the perils of building work; me going to the gym - not a sentence I ever thought I'd say; and my latest Achievement in Adulting.

Send us a textIn which it's apparently very hot; I am the world's worst podcaster; I share one of Mr IKINTST's most excellent comedy moments; Jamie makes a startling prediction; we receive surprising news; I try and fail completely to cope emotionally with the end of Beth's primary school journey; Beth smashes Sports Day; and I have an awful lot of fun with scaffolding. Oh, and I make a huge great colossal error towards the end of the podcast which I couldn't quite manage to edit out, so have...

Send us a textIn which I remember Nana; I share some very exciting breaking news, which will excite precisely no one other than me; I hit new levels of incompetence; there's a Tiger Balm-related warning; death is sh*t, and dementia even more so; Beth finds a Northern Bath; and I share some of my favourite memories of Nana with you all.

Send us a textIn which I gear up for a bonkers week; I have the Night From Hell; my cats are absolute dicks; we discuss the utter pointlessness of SATS; Beth plays her last game of the season; my kids develop a weird obsession; I reveal one of my greatest weaknesses, and one of my biggest fears; I give my top hayfever tip; and Beth shaves a cucumber.

Send us a textIn which I update you all on my writing plans; I explain why you didn't get a podcast last week; Beth has a difficult day; I contemplate taking on an Easter egg challenge; Jamie has a big week; we have a family reunion; I reminisce on the madness of life growing up in a small village; and the big mice invade!

Send us a textIn which I am deeply unglamorous; I have my first AirBNB experience, and make a total tw*t out of myself in public; the cats are d*cks; we reminisce on school trips of old, including my first ever visit to the Royal Albert Hall; Jamie makes an unreasonable request; and my teenage self is absolutely batsh*t.

Send us a textIn which the podcast comes BACK; we have a very exciting Friday night out; I prove my old age credentials; my cat is a twat; I have a near death experience; my children are heroes; I celebrate my wedding anniversary and reminisce over the abject chaos of my wedding day; and Beth plays in the cup final.

Send us a textIn which it is very windy; my love sausage comes out a treat; I discover something even more disturbing than a love sausage; Jamie reviews his sister's football prowess; there is a disappointing lack of sharknados; we have an unwelcome return to home learning; I have a deep-seated distrust of planes; and my children are rather too enamoured by a very dead fox.

Send us a textIn which I go out to buy a love sausage; I do some Proper Adulting; Beth gives me a very proud parenting moment; we celebrate the little things; I tell the truth about just what I found when clearing out my loft; my children do Bad Art; I live in hope that I might have come back into fashion; we award the Dick Cat of the Week Award; I retell my worst ever rainy day moment; and I laugh possibly more than I've ever laughed on a podcast, ever.

Send us a textIn which I successfully complete Dry January; Beth plays in the cup semi-final; I excel at Embarrassing Parenting; we celebrate UP THE BORO!; Brexit is a klutz, and I worry about cats being stereotyped; my dad finds vacuuming his car more confusing than he'd hoped; I try to work out how we make these podcasts more accessible; Jamie's girlfriend arrives at our house LIVE ON THIS PODCAST; I announce our new family project; I share the household work you should avoid at all costs; ...

Send us a textIn which I return from a podcast hiatus; I stagger to the end of Dry January; I explain all the reasons you should steer well clear of the Mother Of All Thunder; my house smells bad; I review Spiderman: No Way Home; I lose the London Eye; Beth wins a bet; and I take my really accessible cervix off for a smear test.

Send us a textIn which we all make it through the first week in January; I tackle Dry January; Jamie is bemused by testing, and Blazer-Gate ensues; the kids and I have an emotional Saturday night; I go viral (in the non-Covid sense); we talk about the perils of parental gaslighting; Beth meets Jamie's girlfriend; I take on a building project; and my Sunday night could not be more rock and roll if it tried.

Send us a textIn which New Year's Eve goes on a bit bloody long; my cats are (festive) dicks; my kids are amazing; there's controversy on the Christmas dinner front; I tell you about the kitchen gadget you never even knew you needed; Jamie shows his dark side; Beth gets VERY confused; and you guys make my absolute year.

Send us a textIt's the festive edition of the podcast: in which I share some of my favourite Christmas memories and traditions; life is discombobulating; my cats are (festive) dicks; Blue Peter takes a questionable approach to Health and Safety; we discuss how other people's Christmas traditions are always wrong; I hate wrapping bastard presents SO MUCH; I celebrate the brilliance of the Christmas Day Walk, and share my greatest Christmas parenting tip of all; I have a massive Christmas fail;...

Send us a textIn which I declare it to be Officially Christmas; Mr IKINTST and I attempt to write a Christmas song, and have a difference of opinion over Christmas decorations; I find myself ill-equipped to cope with the emotional rollercoaster of Christmas films; we discuss the differences of going out for the evening, pre and post children; Beth unmasks Father Christmas; and I have the worst getting ready to go out experience ever.