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Cynical Schlock
Cynical Schlock
17 episodes
6 days ago
Join the Cynical Schlock crew as we subject ourselves to the worst films we can find and share our honest, humorous reviews with you. From B-movies to straight-to-DVD releases, no movie is too terrible for us to tackle. Tune in every week for a new episode filled with laughs and movie-watching mayhem. Whether you're a fan of bad cinema or just looking for a good time, Cynical Schlock has something for you. Join us and let the schlock begin!
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Film Reviews
TV & Film
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All content for Cynical Schlock is the property of Cynical Schlock and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
Join the Cynical Schlock crew as we subject ourselves to the worst films we can find and share our honest, humorous reviews with you. From B-movies to straight-to-DVD releases, no movie is too terrible for us to tackle. Tune in every week for a new episode filled with laughs and movie-watching mayhem. Whether you're a fan of bad cinema or just looking for a good time, Cynical Schlock has something for you. Join us and let the schlock begin!
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Film Reviews
TV & Film
Episodes (17/17)
Cynical Schlock
Episode 17: Meatballs Part II (1984)

In this episode, we take a trip down memory lane with "Meatballs Part II," the 1984 comedy classic directed by Ken Wiederhorn. Join us as we revisit the hijinks and shenanigans of Camp Sasquatch, where the young and old come together for some summer fun. From the pranks to the romance to the iconic musical performances, we dissect every scene and share our thoughts on why this movie still holds up after all these years.

Whether you're a fan of '80s comedies or just looking for a good laugh, this episode is for you. So grab your bug spray, put on your best camp counselor uniform, and join us for a wild ride through the wacky world of "Meatballs Part II."

As always, you can find us on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and all your favorite podcast platforms. Don't forget to follow us on Instagram @followthesquatch and on Facebook at Cynical Schlock. And if you have any feedback or suggestions for future episodes, feel free to reach out to us at cspCast@gmail.com.

Thanks for listening!




Special thanks to Psychostick for our theme song "Obey the Beard."

Lorelei's Lullaby” Ryan Creep - YouTube Song -


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2 years ago
35 minutes 11 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 16: SCHLOCK! (1973)


Get ready for some bananas fun in this week's episode of our podcast! 🍌🎬

We watched "Schlock," a 1973 horror-comedy film that is pure schlock from start to finish. Directed by John Landis and starring Saul Kahan, Joseph Piantadosi, and Don Weisberg, this low-budget movie follows a prehistoric ape named Schlock as it goes on a rampage through a small town, leaving chaos and destruction in its wake.

Join us as we discuss the wacky humor, cheesy special effects, and overall schlockiness of this cult classic. From the over-the-top gore to the corny one-liners, there's no shortage of entertainment in this B-movie gem.

Whether you're a fan of horror-comedy films, B-movies, or just love bananas (we had to sneak that in there!), you won't want to miss this episode. Tune in now to hear our full review and analysis.




special thanks to Psychostick for our theme song "Obey the Beard." Horror Song (Music Box, Piano & Symphony) „Lorelei's Lullaby” (2) Ryan Creep - YouTube Song -

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2 years ago
32 minutes 8 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 15: Bunnyman Massacre (2014)

In this episode of our podcast, we watched "Bunnyman 2" (also known as "Bunnyman Massacre"), a 2014 slasher movie directed by Carl Lindbergh and written by Lindbergh and Matthew Albrecht. Despite the promising premise of a serial killer wearing a bunny mask, we found ourselves disappointed and frustrated with this film.

Join our hosts as they break down every moment of this forgettable horror movie. From the overlong scenes to the gore effects, we leave no stone unturned in our quest to find any redeeming qualities in this schlocky mess.

While our hosts acknowledge that the acting was perhaps the best aspect of the movie, they still found it difficult to remain engaged with the story for its runtime. The lackluster plot and poor execution left them feeling bored and frustrated, with little to hold their interest.

If you're just joining us, be sure to check out our previous episodes from Season 1, and don't forget to follow us on Instagram @followthesquatch and on Facebook at Cynical Schlock. You can also reach us at cspCast@gmail.com or visit our website at https://linktr.ee/cspcast. special thanks to Psychostick for our theme song "Obey the Beard."


Horror Song (Music Box, Piano & Symphony) „Lorelei's Lullaby” (2) Ryan Creep - YouTube Song -


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2 years ago
35 minutes 6 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 14: The Toxic Avenger! (1984)

This week on Cynical Schlock, we're taking a deep dive into the 1984 Troma classic, "The Toxic Avenger." But that's not all – Last week, we had the opportunity to meet the director of the film, Lloyd Kaufman, and we'll be discussing that experience on this episode.

Join us as we explore the twisted world of "The Toxic Avenger," directed by Michael Herz and Lloyd Kaufman, and starring Mitch Cohen, Andree Maranda, and Mark Torgl. We'll be discussing everything from the film's campy humor to its outrageous violence, and sharing our thoughts on whether this movie is worth a watch.

So grab your popcorn and get ready for a wild ride as we delve into the bizarre world of "The Toxic Avenger" with Cynical Schlock. And don't forget to leave us a review and let us know what you thought of the episode!

To get in touch with us, you can reach out via email at cspCast@gmail.com, or visit our website at https://linktr.ee/cspcast. As always, we want to give credit where credit is due, and thank the band Psychostick for their awesome opening theme music, "Obey the Beard,"

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2 years ago
44 minutes 40 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 13: Bloodz Vs Wolvez (2006)

In this episode, we dive into Season 2 by reviewing "Bloodz Vs Wolvez," a 2006 horror film that pits werewolves against vampires in a battle for survival. Written and directed by Zachary Snygg, this low-budget movie is a cheesy and over-the-top affair that has become a cult classic in its own right.

Join our hosts as they break down every cringeworthy moment of this forgettable horror movie. From the terrible acting to the low-budget special effects, we leave no stone unturned in our quest to find the silver lining in this schlocky mess.

If you're just joining us, be sure to check out our previous episodes from Season 1, and don't forget to follow us on Instagram @followthesquatch and on Facebook at Cynical Schlock. You can also reach us at cspCast@gmail.com or visit our website at https://linktr.ee/cspcast.

Finally, special thanks to Psychostick for our theme song "Obey the Beard."


Horror Song (Music Box, Piano & Symphony) „Lorelei's Lullaby” (2) Ryan Creep - YouTube Song -

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2 years ago
40 minutes

Cynical Schlock
Episode 12: Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988)

This week, we're diving into the 1988 film "Killer Klowns from Outer Space." Join us as we explore the plot, characters, and special effects of this campy cult classic. We'll discuss the movie, and share our thoughts on whether or not it's worth watching.

So grab some popcorn and get ready for a wild ride as we delve into the wacky world of "Killer Klowns from Outer Space" with Cynical Schlock. And don't forget to leave us a review and let us know what you thought of the episode!

Directed by Stephen Chiodo

Written by Charles Chiodo, Stephen Chiodo, and Edward Chiodo

Starring Grant Cramer, Suzanne Snyder, John Allen Nelson, and John Vernon

CYNICAL SCHLOCK Contact Information:

Email: cspCast@gmail.com

Website: https://linktr.ee/cspcast

Let's give credit where credit is due:

The opening theme music for this episode is "Obey the Beard" by @psychostick.

"Birthday Bitches" by Insane Clown Posse


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2 years ago
51 minutes 40 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 11: Surf Nazis Must Die (1987)

Get ready to hit the waves and fight some Surf Nazis, because the first episode of season two of Cynical Schlock is finally here! Join us as we dive into the 1987 film "Surf Nazis Must Die." This campy cult classic tells the story of a group of surfers who terrorize a beach community, only to be faced with retaliation from the grandmother of one of their victims.

In this episode, we'll discuss the plot, characters, and special effects of "Surf Nazis Must Die." We'll share our thoughts on the themes and messages of the movie, and whether or not it's worth watching. And to top it off, we have a brand new opening theme from the one and only @psychostick - "Obey the Beard" - to get you pumped up for each episode.

So grab your surfboards and get ready for a wild ride on the waves of "Surf Nazis Must Die" with Cynical Schlock. Don't forget to leave us a review and let us know what you thought of the film!

Director Peter George

Writers Peter George Jon Ayre

CYNICAL SCHLOCK social media and contact info:

Instagram: @followthesquatch

Facebook: Cynical Schlock

Email: cspCast@gmail.com

Website: https://linktr.ee/cspcast

Let's give credit where credit is due:

The opening theme music for this episode is "Obey the Beard" by @psychostick

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2 years ago
35 minutes 27 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 10: Jack Frost (1997)

In this episode of Cynical Schlock, we review the horror movie Jack Frost. Follow the story of a serial killer who, after being covered in toxic waste, is transformed into a murderous snowman. Will he be stopped before he kills again? Tune in to find out what we thought of this chilling film.

Join us as we discuss the plot, characters, and special effects of Jack Frost. We'll also share our thoughts on the themes and messages of the movie, and whether or not it's worth watching.

So grab your blankets and hot cocoa, and get ready for a spooky episode of Cynical Schlock. Don't forget to leave us a review and let us know what you thought of the film!

Director Michael Cooney

Writers Jeremy Paige(story)
Michael Cooney(story)

Stars Scott MacDonald
Christopher Allport
Stephen Mendel


CYNICAL SCHLOCK social media and contact info

Instagram:  @followthesquatch

Facebook: Cynical Schlock

Email: cspCast@gmail.com

Website: https://linktr.ee/cspcast

......Let's give credit where credit is Due......

Happy New Year Everyone! - Animal Crossing New Horizons

"Zombie Chase" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Author: Kevin MacLeod Website -Royalty Free Music (incompetech.com)


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2 years ago
52 minutes 16 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 9: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964)

This week, the CSP crew is blasted off to Mars! The Martians are trying to save their children from the doldrums of everyday life. We watch as they kidnap two Earth children and wreak havoc on the North Pole before capturing the big man himself! How will Santa save Christmas this time? Tune in to find out! 

CYNICAL SCHLOCK social media and contact info

Instagram:  @followthesquatch

Facebook: Cynical Schlock

Email: cspCast@gmail.com

Website: https://linktr.ee/cspcast

......Let's give credit where credit is Due......


Director

Nicholas Webster

Writers

Glenville Mareth (screenplay) Paul L. Jacobson (based on a story by)

Stars

John Call Leonard Hicks Vincent Beck


Budget

  • $200,000 (estimated)


Horror Song (Music Box, Piano & Symphony) „Lorelei's Lullaby” (2) Ryan Creep - YouTube Song -

"Zombie Chase" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Author: Kevin MacLeod Website -Royalty Free Music (incompetech.com)


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2 years ago
52 minutes 3 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 8: Elf-Man (2012)

Here we go again, this time we find ourselves watching a jackass star in a family friendly movie...and it goes just about as well as you would expect.  Elf-man is a straight to DVD Christmas special that mixes home alone, elf and, the popular Christmas toy " elf on a shelf.  Wee-man, Mackenzie Astin, and Jeffery Combs star in this low budget sad attempt at a kid's movie   

Director:  Ethan Wiley

Writers: Ethan Wiley Richard Jefferies


CYNICAL SCHLOCK social media and contact info

Instagram:  @followthesquatch

Facebook: Cynical Schlock

Email: cspCast@gmail.com

Website: https://linktr.ee/cspcast

......Let's give credit where credit is Due......

Happy New Year Everyone! - Animal Crossing New Horizons

"Zombie Chase" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Author: Kevin MacLeod Website -Royalty Free Music (incompetech.com)


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2 years ago
43 minutes 31 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 7: Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny (1972)

Come Join our Crew while we discuss a Christmas movie that has as much to do about Christmas as it does one of its Titular characters the Ice Cream Bunny. Santa gets stranded in Florida of all places and is forced to enlist the help of local theme park attending children through the use of telepathy which is where all of the craziness starts to happen. 

Directed by 

Richard Winer ... (as R. Winer)

Jay Ripley ... Santa Claus (as Jay Clark)


CYNICAL SCHLOCK social media and contact info

Instagram:  @followthesquatch

Facebook: Cynical Schlock

Email: cspCast@gmail.com

Website: https://linktr.ee/cspcast

......Let's give credit where credit is Due......

Happy New Year Everyone! - Animal Crossing New Horizons

"Zombie Chase" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Author: Kevin MacLeod Website -Royalty Free Music (incompetech.com)


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2 years ago
36 minutes 19 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 6: ThanksKilling (2007)

It's Thanksgiving so we watched the worst Thanksgiving movie we could find. a turkey puppet who uses a shotgun and half a million one liners to murder his targets is the villain of this low budget comedic horror movie.  join us while we review ThanksKilling!

CYNICAL SCHLOCK social media and contact info

Instagram:  @followthesquatch

Facebook: Cynical Schlock

Email: cspCast@gmail.com

Website: https://linktr.ee/cspcast

......Let's give credit where credit is Due......

Director

  • Jordan Downey
  • Writers
    • Jordan Downey
    • Brad Schulz
    • (additional dialogue) Kevin Stewart
  • Stars
    • Wanda Lust
    • Natasha Cordova
    • Lindsey Anderson
  • Release date
    • December 6, 2008 (United States)

Budget

  • $3,500 (estimated)

Genre:  Horror Comedy

Creepy Horror Song (Music Box, Piano & Symphony) „Lorelei's Lullaby” (2) Ryan Creep - YouTube Song -

"Zombie Chase" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Author: Kevin MacLeod Website -Royalty Free Music (incompetech.com)


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2 years ago
48 minutes 14 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 5: Invisible Dad (1997)

Join our crew while they Discuss the 1997 family comedy Invisible Dad!  After moving cross country, Doug finds a strange computer that can make his wildest dreams come true... or his is dad vanish.

CYNICAL SCHLOCK social media and contact info

Instagram:  @followthesquatch

Facebook: Cynical Schlock

Email: cspCast@gmail.com

Website: https://linktr.ee/cspcast

......Let's give credit where credit is Due......

Director: Fred Olen Ray

Writer: Steve Latshaw/ Fred Olen Ray

Stars:  Daran Norris, Karen Black, William Meyers

Genre:  Family Comedy 

Creepy Horror Song (Music Box, Piano & Symphony) „Lorelei's Lullaby” (2) Ryan Creep - YouTube Song -

"Zombie Chase" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Author: Kevin MacLeod Website -Royalty Free Music (incompetech.com)

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2 years ago
1 hour 35 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 4: Hobgoblins (1988)

Join Aster Joey and Owl while they Discuss the 1988 rip off of Gremlins by director, writer and producer Rick Sloan.  an alien species escapes from a movie studio film vault to wreak havoc on a group of local teens by trying to use their fantasies to lure them to their death!

 CYNICAL SCHLOCK social media and contact info  

Instagram:  @followthesquatch 

 Facebook: Cynical Schlock 

  Email: cspCast@gmail.com  

Website: https://linktr.ee/cspcast 

......Let's give credit where credit is Due...... 

       Director:  Rick Sloan

Writer: Rick Sloan

 Stars:  Daran Norris Tom Bartlett Paige Sullivan

Genre:  Horror. 

 Creepy Horror Song (Music Box, Piano & Symphony) „Lorelei's Lullaby” (2) Ryan Creep - YouTube Song -

  "Zombie Chase" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Author: Kevin MacLeod Website -Royalty Free Music (incompetech.com)

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3 years ago
46 minutes 29 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 3: Hell of The Living Dead (1980)
The CSP crew is back for another Horrible Halloween episode! This time we discuss HELL OF THE LIVING DEAD, which we dub the worst zombie movie of all time. It has bad makeup and even worse zombie action, tune in to hear our review! ========== CYNICAL SCHLOCK  social media and contact info  Instagram:  @followthesquatch  Facebook: Cynical Schlock   Email: cspCast@gmail.com  Website: https://linktr.ee/cspcast  ========= ......Let's give credit where credit is Due...... Hell of The Living Dead (1980)         Director: Bruno Mattei and Claudio Fragasso  Writer: Claudio Fragasso(story and screenplay) José María Cunillés(story and screenplay) Rossella Drudi(uncredited) Stars:  Margie Newton Franco Garofalo Selan Karay Genre:  Horror.  Creepy Horror Song (Music Box, Piano & Symphony) „Lorelei's Lullaby” (2) Ryan Creep - YouTube Song -  "Zombie Chase" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Author: Kevin MacLeod Website -Royalty Free Music (incompetech.com)
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3 years ago
35 minutes 28 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 2: Shark Exorcist (2015)
Horrible Halloween continues as we review SHARK EXORCIST from 2015. This shark horror had our hosts moanin' and groanin' over the horrible acting, mouth breathing cameraman and so much more. Even though this movie has a run time of just over an hour, it feels like a lifetime of pain. This movie was so bad, our entire cast was forced to apologize.  ========== CYNICAL SCHLOCK social media and contact info Instagram: Csp Cast (@followthesquatch) Facebook: Cynical Schlock  Email: cspCast@gmail.com Website: Cynical Schlock ========= ......Let's give credit where credit is Due...... Shark Exorcist (2015) Director: Donald Farmer Writer: Donald Farmer Stars: Angela Kerecz, Bobby Kerecz, Roni Jonah. Genre:  Horror. Creepy Horror Song (Music Box, Piano & Symphony) „Lorelei's Lullaby” (2) Ryan Creep - YouTube Song - "Zombie Chase" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Author: Kevin MacLeod Website - http://incompetech.com/Royalty Free Link - http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-...Genre Link - http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-...
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3 years ago
1 hour 8 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Episode 1: Doom Asylum (1987)

Join our crew while they dive into the first Horrible Halloween Movie of the year in our Debut episodes review of DOOM ASYLUM from 1987. This Horror parody had our hosts laughing hard but not for the right reasons. Playboy bunnies, Penthouse models and even one of the girls from Sex and The City decide the best place to party this summer was in an abandoned asylum... One that houses a campy serial killer. 

=======================================================================================================================

CYNICAL SCHLOCK social media and contact info

Instagram: Csp Cast (@followthesquatch)

Facebook: Cynical Schlock 

Email: cspCast@gmail.com

=======================================================================================================================

......Let's give credit where credit is Due......

Doom Asylum 1987

  • Director: Richard Friedman
  • Writer: Richard Friedman, Rick Marx, Steven G. Menkin
  • Stars: Patty Mullen, Ruth Collins, Kristin Davis
  • Genre: Comedy, Horror


Creepy Horror Song (Music Box, Piano & Symphony) „Lorelei's Lullaby” (2) Ryan Creep - YouTube

Song - "Zombie Chase" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Author: Kevin MacLeod Website - http://incompetech.com/Royalty Free Link - http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-...Genre Link - http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-...


Show more...
3 years ago
1 hour 24 minutes 46 seconds

Cynical Schlock
Join the Cynical Schlock crew as we subject ourselves to the worst films we can find and share our honest, humorous reviews with you. From B-movies to straight-to-DVD releases, no movie is too terrible for us to tackle. Tune in every week for a new episode filled with laughs and movie-watching mayhem. Whether you're a fan of bad cinema or just looking for a good time, Cynical Schlock has something for you. Join us and let the schlock begin!