Dr. Hughes tells the listener the two most vital things related to sexuality for the higher desire partner. The first is that their soul is in separately sexual. The second is an action step of being present so that the higher desire partner‘s soul feels accepted, valued, desired, cared for,and seen.
Dr. Hughes provides the insight to the question of, “so what do I do now that I am learning all of this about myself or my partner.” He discusses the two negative outcome options and the two positive outcome options for the sexual desire discrepancy couple that has now began to gain insight into what is really going on at the root of this dynamic.
This episode creates the understanding, language, and “way out” for couples stuck in issues of sexual desire discrepancy. Dr. Hughes is the first to put forward clear and concrete words, understanding, and ways to move forward for couples plagued by these discrepancies. Dr. Hughes has created a sexual playground analogy that enables couples to do this. The higher desire partner yearns for their partner to play on this sexual playground with them. Playing on the playground isn’t just doing sexual acts. It’s not about sex. It’s about the meaning of sex. It’s about the engagement and desire to play on the playground with the higher desire partner. Dr. Hughes provides examples of how the lower desire partner can still help the higher desire partner feel accepted, connected, seen, and loved while not dramatically increasing intercourse or varied sexual activity. These examples also help the higher desire partner find ways to play on their sexual playground with their partner in ways where they are no longer alone while also respecting the difference in their partner.