The alien from Alien returns, but to a medium that's alien from what it's used to: television. Danny and Kevin make their way through the first season of FX's Alien: Earth and its endless dissolve transitions, Peter Pan references, and xenomorphs attacking people in labs to an inconclusive verdict. Is this the best Alien project since Aliens, or is it just another run-of-the-mill Alien story from this century lacking the special sauce of the entries from last century?
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Fifty years ago, a picture about a shark inaugurated a new era in cinema. And like the Chinese alchemists who accidentally invented gunpowder while trying to create the elixir of life, Jaws has led to immense suffering and exploitation. But who cares? Steven Spielberg's debut on the world stage remains an untouchable masterpiece of Big Movie Magic. It is a perfect film. To dislike it is to be inhuman. There is nothing new to say about this movie but Danny and Kevin would probably be reading books if it weren't for this film. And like the Qianlong Emperor, we believe books serve only to corrupt youth. So listen and celebrate fifty years of Jaws with us.
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Danny and Kevin have now seen both Sinners and Weapons, two R rated original movies from directors on the rise and released by Warner Brothers. The similarities in the production, critical praise, and box office success of these pictures begged for a combined episode. Listen as your hosts praise a studio for having the gall to trust their directors, even letting them have characters talk about and take part in sexual activities!
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Danny and Kevin discuss that rarest of birds, the big-budget studio comedy. Last seen awkwardly shuffling its feet between the Amazon offices and a movie theater, this once ubiquitous creature was all but extinct. And it almost certainly still is but damn if the new Naked Gun reboot legacy sequel wasn't a hoot. Folks, comedy is legal again. OJ did it. The Naked Gun '25 won't change the world but it is very, very, very funny. And that's really all it needs to be.
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Marvel's first family comes home as The Fantastic Four make their Marvel Cinematic Universe debut in The Fantastic Four: First Steps. This is the fifth iteration of a Fantastic Four movie and the 37th film released by Marvel Studios. That number is not a reference to Clerks, though Dante would probably feel the same disgust towards Marvel as he did his girlfriend when he learned about her and the number 37. There have actually been 37 films released as part of the MCU in just 17 years, which feels like the right moment for the comic OGs to check-in for the first time. Because of this staggering number, Danny and Kevin do everything they can to avoid talking about the film. There was no Mike Francesa talk this week, but the duo do question whether or not Shrek is more culturally relevant than The Avengers, why the MCU is losing its imprint on the industry, and if Franklin Richards was conceived immaculately.
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Danny and Kevin continue their summer sojourn at the cinema with Superman '25. The film is the first entry in the new DC Universe franchise, the fifth superhero film directed by James Gunn and (depending how you count) like the tenth or twentieth theatrically released Superman film. Does the world still need Superman? Does the world want Superman? And what exactly makes Superman such a super man? These questions, as well as others such as "How did Chris Christie's audition to take over for WFAN's Mike Francesa go?", are answered in the latest chapter of John Byrne's seminal Coffee and Deathsticks run.
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The hotly anticipated Jurassic World: Rebirth has finally hit theaters after the excruciatingly long, three-year wait to see what happened after Jurassic World: Dominion. Dominion was beloved by critics and fans alike for its brave choice in making a dinosaur movie without dinosaurs. Rebirth bucks this trend by including dinosaurs, real and mutated alike! Get ready for the seventh iteration of people going to an island with dinosaurs for money. It's full of surprises!
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This title may look like a typo, but those of you who follow Michael Caine on Twitter X know it's quite deliberate. Danny and Kevin celebrate 20 years (to the day) of Batman Begins by providing a commentary track for this beloved Christopher Nolan film. The duo discuss the impact of this picture and The Dark Knight trilogy on both the superhero genre as well as general blockbuster popcorn films while occasionally referencing how awesome the scene playing at the time of their rambling is. They also ask important questions, like is Katie Holmes really that bad of an actor? Or, what's so special about condensed milk?
If you are watching the movie while listening, hit play on the movie at the 1 minute 50 second mark of the podcast. Follow us on Instagram and email us at coffeeanddeathsticks@gmail.com
Danny and Kevin accept the final (?) mission and discuss the epic (?) finale to the saga (?) of beloved character (?) Ethan Hunt and his team of devoted friends and OTs in their battle against SPs and Xenu. It's been eight films and thirty years but it has never, ever been boring or even predictable. Listen as the fellas discuss this and much else, including the possibility that Jeremy Renner is stupid and annoying #jeremyrennerofficialapp
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Revenge of the Sith turns 20, forcing Danny and Kevin to conclude their out of sequence prequel trilogy recaps. This is the beloved entry in the ever polarizing prequel trilogy, but do Danny and Kevin feel the same way? Listen to your favorite podcasters as they draw lines in the sand, admit to guilty pleasures, and wax poetic yet again about John Williams.
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That's right, out of respect to Tony Gilroy and Co. for sticking the landing, the subtitle of this episode discussing the finale of Andor is the main character's actual name. Was Cassian ever the most compelling character on his own show? No, not even once. But he proved a perfect AXIS around which this tale of revolution could revolve. Danny and Kevin discuss the final arc of Andor and how it adds nothing but flavor and taste to the gigantic pot of stew that is Star Wars. It is, in fact, more fun to talk about movies and shows that one enjoys and finds entertaining and engrossing. May the Force be with us until the next streaming hustle comes along to remind us to grow up.
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"Look how they massacred my boy" but in a good way. Danny and Kevin discuss the latest (and greatest?) arc of the Andor show. What does fate have in store for Space Javert, Calrissian Andorian, Fascist Girlboss, Mon Mothma's Back!, Basil Oregano: Princess Leia's Non-Biological Father, and Stellan Skarsgård? Turns out that it's another round of some incredibly sturdy and entertaining storytelling from a man who has both never seen most of Star Wars and yet understands it better than most. Vive Ghorman and down with the Empire folks.
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Danny and Kevin recap the next arc of Andor Season 2. They discuss the good (Varian Skye!), the bad (recasting Basil Oregano!), and the ugly (Forest Whitaker talking!) of these middle episodes while speculating what may come next. Will General Madine make his Disney+ debut? Stay tuned!
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Danny and Kevin return to a galaxy far, far away to discuss the first three episodes of Andor Season 2. All our favorites are back: Cassian, Bix, Brasso, Goober, Skulltutis, Therngo, Mon Mothma, Zorpaz, Dedra, Qyburn, Luthen, Copbot, Forest Whitaker, and of course, Syril Karn. Can a Star War ever truly be for grown-ups? Who knows and, if it's entertaining, who cares? May the 4th be with you.
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Danny and Kevin return to the realm of Earth's most profitable heroes for a discussion of shows that came out like five years ago. Up first is an analysis of Loki: Season 2 and its place in the larger, increasingly pointless, cinematic universe it broke away from. And then it's a review of X-Men '97, the long-delayed sixth season to every millennial's second-favorite cartoon about superheroes. In between, Danny's son tells Kevin what Pixar movie he's been watching.
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Danny and Kevin are catching up on the recent Best Picture nominations at the Academy Awards and wanted to talk about two standouts: Conclave and Anora. The Pope almost died leading up to Hollywood's Biggest Night and would've given the people something to root for in the evening's most coveted prize. Alas, Frank is still with us, but the movie about a fictional conclave was more entertaining than what we would've had anyway. The winning picture, Anora, made filmmaker Sean Baker a household name, which he already was to Danny and Kevin. The duo talk this movie and his entire excellent filmography.
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Danny and Kevin embark on a long-expected discussion: What's the deal with The Hobbit Trilogy? Nestled among the dark knights and avengers of the 2010s, Peter Jackson's follow-up to The Lord of the Rings is a misfire. A dud. A missed opportunity..A delightful children's tale awkwardly translated into an unwieldy trilogy. Where and why does it fail? Where, if anywhere, does it succeed? And who do we have to banish into the void to never have to see those freakin' eagles again?
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Danny and Kevin watched the latest Star War and found it entertaining and enjoyable. That's it. No "but" or smart-aleck, back-handed compliment. The new Disney+ program Skeleton Crew is a fun addition to the vast Star Wars universe and kids of all ages will have a good time watching it. Unless you don't like Star Wars, in which case, you know, stop watching Star Wars. Follow us on Instagram or email us at coffeeanddeathsticks@gmail.com
Coffee and Deathsticks returns from a brief holiday hiatus to the nightmare that is Nosferatu, the latest picture from gothic horror master Robert Eggers. Now that they have cleaned all the poop from their pants, Danny and Kevin finally aren't afraid anymore and can break down the latest piece of Dracula IP while talking about the Francis Ford Coppola one a lot.
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Folks. It's Morbin' Time.
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