Your 30s are WEIRD and nobody warned us, so Patryck is breaking it all down:
Why do hangovers last 3 days now? Why is your bedroom suddenly off-limits to everyone including yourself? Why do you need a month to mentally prepare for hosting? And why does every dating app conversation feel like a job interview about your five-year plan?
This episode covers: ✨ The switch that flips at 30 🍺 Three-day hangover recovery protocols 🏠 Home buying chaos 💀 Dating pools that make you want to stay single forever 😤 People who say "ex-presso" and sheriffs with ungodly mustaches
BONUS: Patryck's advice for things to do before 40 (from someone who's screwed up enough to know what actually matters)
ONLY 5 EPISODES LEFT IN SEASON 1! We're pausing after Episode 15, so catch up now!
If you've ever wondered why adulting in your 30s feels like a completely different game, this episode will have you saying "FINALLY someone gets it."
Link in bio 🎧
#BackPorchBitching #Episode10 #30sLife #AdultingIsWeird #PodcastLife #RealTalk #GrowingUpIsWeird #MillennialProblems #ThirtyFlirtyAndThriving
In 1864, Methodist preacher Bill Skeeto spoke out against the Confederacy and paid a substitute to fight so he could nurse his dying wife. The town called him a deserter and a coward.
On a cold November day, men he thought were friends ambushed him by the Choctawhatchee River. They hanged him from an oak tree, but Bill was so tall his toes touched the ground. So they dug a hole beneath his feet with a crutch—and watched him slowly strangle to death.
Bill's final words: "If you hang me here, you will never forget this spot."
For over 150 years, that hole has remained near Newton, Alabama. You can fill it with dirt, pack it down, even dump trash in it. But when you return, it's swept clean—like invisible hands keep it that way.
Legend says it's Bill Skeeto's ghost, marking the spot where an innocent man died, making sure nobody forgets.
Back Porch Bitching Episode 9: "Brewery Btchn"
Y'all, Patryck did something DIFFERENT this week - he brought the microphone to a local brewery and recorded a completely unfiltered conversation with friends David and Katherine on a Saturday night. Why did we think this was a good idea?
What happens when you mix beer + real talk + a recording device?
We're talking about:
Fair warning: Alcohol was involved. This episode is raw, unscripted, and probably the most authentic thing we've ever put out.
The takeaway? Life's too short for surface-level small talk. Grab a beer with friends who show up for you and have those crucial conversations.
Shoutout to David and Katherine for being brave (or tipsy) enough to do this with us! 🙌
In 1830s Tuscaloosa, the grand Drish Mansion stood as a symbol of wealth and status. But behind its white columns lived dark secrets—a cruel, alcoholic doctor who died fleeing his own demons, and a proper Southern wife determined to maintain appearances at any cost.
Before her death, Mrs. Drish made one request: burn the same candles at her funeral that had surrounded her husband's coffin. But when those candles couldn't be found, the faithful servants knew what would happen—"Mrs. Drish is gonna walk just like the Mister did!"
For over 150 years, mysterious lights have flickered in the mansion's tower windows. Fire departments rush to the scene only to find nothing. No flames. No candles. No explanation.
Are they reflections? Or is Mrs. Drish still up there, burning the candles she was denied, keeping an eternal vigil over Tuscaloosa?
They call them "death lights in the tower." And on dark Alabama nights, they still burn.
👻 Some promises outlast death. Some lights burn forever.
#SouthernGhostStories #TrueGhostStories #AlabamaHauntings #DrishMansion #Tuscaloosa #GhostStories #Paranormal #SouthernGothic #HauntedAlabama #TuscaloosaAlabama #BackPorchBtchnPodcast
This week Patryck is diving into the uncomfortable truth nobody talks about - the unspoken competition that happens when you and your single friends are out in the same dating pool.
When you're gay in a small area, the dating pool is already tiny. Add another single friend into the mix and suddenly you're navigating weird tension, competing for attention, and trying to figure out who gets to pursue the cute guy who just walked over.
Plus the nightmare scenario we've all experienced: "I'm talking to this guy" only to find out your friend already hooked up with him. The degrees of separation in the gay community are basically nonexistent.
Patryck gets real about why he's been gravitating toward coupled friends, the exhaustion of the competitive dynamic, and how dating becomes even harder when you could potentially turn on a friend over someone you both have interest in.
The bottom line: Your friendships are worth more than any hookup. Have the awkward conversations before resentment builds.
This is part one of a mini series for the month of October!
Y'all, we're doing something DIFFERENT this October...
Back Porch Bitching Presents: Spooky Stories A Limited Spooky Season Series
That's right - Patryck is trading complaints for hauntings and bringing you the creepiest, most unsettling tales from down South. Because nothing says October like ghost stories told from an actual back porch where things definitely go bump in the night.
This story takes place in a small town in Alabama. The story of Henry Wells, a story as old as time but recaptured by the great Katherine Tucker Windham.
Get ready for some truth bombs! 💣
This week Patryck is DRAGGING social media culture and we are absolutely HERE for it!
But it's not just shade - Patryck shares the most beautiful story about disagreeing with a friend and STILL ending with "I love you, bro." Plus why listening to "Amazing Grace" on repeat made him realize we're all missing the point about showing each other grace online.
Think you can handle some hard truths about cancel culture, fact-checking fails, and why we're all trying so hard to be right that we're forgetting to be human? This episode will call you out AND lift you up.
Warning: This episode might make you actually think before you post that hot take. Side effects include increased empathy, the urge to be a decent human online, and possibly texting someone "I love you, bro" after an argument.
You know you want this level of real talk ☕ Hit play and prepare to feel personally attacked in the best way!
Audio Mixing: Profanist Productions
Honey, let me tell you about my girl Katie - this woman is living her BEST life and has some stories to share! From bouncing back after her divorce like the queen she is, to dating some interesting fellas (bless their hearts and their... creative tattoo choices), Katie's been on quite the adventure. Now she's discovered a whole new side of herself and is exploring dating women for the first time - and y'all, she is THRIVING! Katie's out here navigating these dating streets with style and I finally convinced her to spill all the tea on her modern dating journey and how she's found parts of herself she never knew existed. Look, y'all have heard me chat about the dating world plenty, but now it's time for me to step back and let my fabulous friend share her fresh perspective! If you want some real talk about love, life, and embracing your authentic self, Katie's got the goods. She's serving up all the fun and beautiful truth about reinventing yourself and she's not holding back one bit!
Audio and Theme Song: Profanist Productions
https://www.instagram.com/profanistproductions?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==
#backporchbtchnpodcast #ModernDating #LivingMyBestLife #DatingStories #FindingYourself #AuthenticSelf #Thriving #SelfDiscovery #DatingJourney #NewChapter #RealTalk #SpillingTea #SouthernStories #BestLife #DatingAdventures #LoveIsLove #QueerJourney #BounceBack #Reinvention #FreshPerspective #OutInTheseStreets #SouthernCharm #PodcastLife #DatingTales #SelfLove #NewBeginnings #LGBTQ #GrowthMindset #Fabulous #Authentic
Episode 5: Southern Baptist Shame - where I spill the tea about my church neighbors from hell, including Pastor Problematic and his "progressive" views, plus Mailbox Murderin' Melvin who demolished my mailbox and tried to flee the scene!
Also featuring listener mail from Kentucky (Ozempic jingles are ruining our childhood songs!) and Virginia (sorry, but we will NOT be slandering rain appreciation in the South - that's sacred territory!).
Grab your bourbon and settle in for some neighborhood drama, selective Christian morality, and why doing the right thing shouldn't require police threats.
#BackPorchBitchin #PodcastLife #SouthernDrama #ChurchNeighborsFromHell #DoTheRightThing
Episode 4: "Live, Laugh, Leave Me Alone" is here and I went OFF on all the tired home decor trends that need to DIE.
What we covered:
PLUS: "Porch Mail: Y'all's Bitchin'" where I read YOUR anonymous complaints about reply-all email abusers and office loudmouths.
Remember - I'm not an interior decorator, I just have taste. If these things bring you joy, do you boo. Just know I'll be judging it 😘
New episodes every Wednesday!
Available wherever you get your podcasts. Tell your mama I love her and I hope her health is well. Y'all take care.
ALSO: Audio services to include theme song, mixing and editing now provided by our partners at Profanist Productions. Go check them out!
#podcast #homedecor #rant #realtalk #livelaugh leave #newwednesday #decortrends #interior #basicdecor
This week Patryck is talking about "Coming In" - what happens when you get your mental health together and suddenly everyone thinks you've joined a cult just because you're not a hot mess anymore.
Plus our NEW segment "Porch Mail: Y'all's Bitching" featuring complaints about bitches named Holly, mixed signals in the bedroom, and whether 36 is actually middle-aged (spoiler: not in real years, but definitely in gay years 💀).
If you've ever had to explain to people that being emotionally stable isn't suspicious, this episode is for YOU.
#BackPorchBitching #MentalHealthJourney #PodcastLife #ComingIn
Join host Patryck as he spills the tea on Richmond's chaotic gay dating scene! From open relationship couples flooding the apps to aging Peter Pans chasing 20-somethings around bars, Patryck serves up a hilarious field guide to the beautiful disaster that is finding love in Virginia's most confused city. Whether it's enlightened vegans lecturing about quinoa, military contractors cosplaying as Jason Bourne, or political gays who get aroused by campaign finance reform, Richmond's dating pool is full of... well, let's just say it's as murky as the James River.
Welcome to Back Porch Bitchin'! A middle-aged gay Southerner tackles dating disasters, cultural hypocrisy, and life's daily nonsense from his Richmond porch. It's bourbon, biscuits, and zero filter. Come sit a spell and let's handle some shit together. 🥃
