Self-harm is one of those topics that can feel scary to talk about — for clients and therapists.
Today's conversation is a tender one. We’re exploring self-harm from a therapist’s perspective and why it’s rarely about “attention” — and always about pain that needs understanding. Jess and Ryan talk about what self-harm really is (and isn’t), why people use it to cope, common misunderstandings, and how therapists think about safety without jumping straight to panic or punishment.
Tune in for an honest, gentle, and stigma-free look at a topic that deserves compassion — not fear 💕
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
Let’s be real — therapy can be expensive, and it can feel frustrating when the bill keeps adding up.
In this episode, Jess and Ryan get honest about why therapy costs what it does and what clients don’t always see behind the scenes. They talk about the unglamorous parts of the job — endless admin, training, fees — and the emotional side of it too: the guilt and sadness that come when clients can’t afford to keep going.
Tune in for a real, open conversation about money and mental health ❤️
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
Ever wondered what exactly psychedelic therapy is all about?
In this episode, we sit down with a special guest, Monica Lau - an expert therapist in psychedelic healing - to explore the full journey of this fascinating and controversial approach.
We discuss how psychedelic therapy sessions typically work, the kinds of insights and transformations people experience, and the potential downsides you should know about. We also dive into who tends to benefit most from this type of therapy, and what it’s like for a trained therapist to guide someone through such a powerful process.
Tune in for a mix of expert knowledge and honest reflections on what it really means to expand your mind in the name of healing ✨
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
Ever wondered what it's like for your therapist to see their own therapist? 👀
Spoiler alert: it's just as messy for them as it is for you.
In this episode, Jess and Ryan laugh (and cringe) their way through the ironic truth that knowing all the tools doesn’t always mean they use them.
They also open up about their own experiences in the client chair - the awkward, the disappointing, and the deeply healing. From bad fits and missed attunement to the therapists who really got it right, we talk about what it’s actually like to look for a therapist when you are one.
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
Jess and Ryan are going there.
In this episode, they open up about how the topic of sex shows up in the therapy room in all it's complicated and uncomplicated ways. They talk about what clients are really asking, how therapists navigate those conversations, and why talking about sex doesn’t have to be uncomfortable.
Tune in for a warm, open discussion that makes the awkward and confusing parts of sex feel a little more human.
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
The wait is FINALLY over! Season 3 is here! Jess and Ryan kick things off by diving headfirst into the messy, funny, and sometimes cringeworthy world of dating.
From dating app disasters to awkward first dates, they share their own experiences and how being therapists has shifted the way they navigate love.
Plus, they drop insider tips on what to watch out for when dating - straight from the therapy room. You're welcome 😉
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
This Pride Month hits different. Between rising political tensions, safety concerns, and the growing weight of being “out” in public, the usual rainbow-filled celebration feels… complicated.
In this special bonus episode, Jess and Ryan reflect on the precarity of Pride in 2025 - from the therapy room to the broader cultural moment. We revisit themes like rainbow-washing, being the “quiet gay,” intersectionality, and the emotional toll of it all.
It’s real, it’s messy, and it’s probably what your therapist has been thinking too ❤️
Check out our previous years' Pride content here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLZMbr2AgUIln_rho8JUhCXgYzxn6z6dR7
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLZMbr2AgUIlmq43dduwvqB7ZtIBZdAVEX
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
This week, we’re wrapping things up with Part 2 of our season finale - and yes, Denise is once again putting us in the hot seat! As our producer (and resident professional question-asker), she asks the most thought-provoking questions about themes from Episodes 10 to 18.
We’re getting into the deep stuff - like whether narcissists can actually develop empathy through therapy, how therapists help clients who are scared of being involuntarily committed feel safe enough to open up, and what it really looks like to hold someone accountable in therapy without pushing them away.
Tune in for all the tea on this season! 👀✨
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
This week, we’re switching things up! Denise, our producer (and professional question-asker), steps out from behind the scenes for our special season finale episode to grill Jess and Ryan on everything you’ve been wondering about from Episodes 1 to 8 of this season.
We’re diving into how clients have challenged Jess and Ryan's imposter syndrome in-session, what people tend to lie most about in therapy and the overall vibe in their therapy rooms lately - especially with all the political tension and collective burnout in the air.
Plus, some behind-the-scenes takes, surprising themes that came up this season, and honest reflections from your favorite therapist duo.
If you’ve ever listened and thought, “I wish someone would just ask them ___,” this one’s for you.
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
In this heartfelt episode, Jess and Ryan get real about the reason behind for our recent break from the podcast - burnout.
They open up about what burnout looks like in their lives as therapists, especially as they run a private practice.
They also dive into how they navigate the tricky conversations that come up when clients worry they’re the reason for their therapist’s exhaustion, and how they take care of themselves to avoid burnout.
Tune in for a raw, reflective, and deeply honest conversation about sustainability, boundaries, and being human - on both sides of the therapy room ✨
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
In this episode, Jess and Ryan dive deep into the world of personality disorders - what they are, how they’re diagnosed, and how therapy can (or can’t) help.
We unpack the key traits of narcissistic personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, histrionic personality disorder, etc., breaking down the DSM-5 criteria and common misconceptions.
We also explore how therapists approach working with clients who have these diagnoses, what progress can look like, and whether lasting change is truly possible.
Tune in for our informed and compassionate take on this very complex topic ✨
Click here for more details on our Psychodynamic Workshop for therapists:
https://centredself.ca/psychodynamic-workshop
Click here to sign up for our any of our workshops: https://centredself.ca/contact
Or email us: therapy@centredself.ca
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram:@yourtherapistisnotokay
In this episode, Jess and Ryan sit down for an honest, heartfelt conversation about internalized homophobia - what it is, where it comes from, and why it can be so tough to untangle. They break down the root causes, share the many ways it can show up in people's lives, and talk about what it looks like to support clients who are working through it in therapy.Whether you’re personally navigating internalized homophobia, supporting someone who is, or just wanting to better understand this experience, Jess and Ryan offer insights, real talk, and a lot of compassion along the way. You’re not alone; healing is possible 🫶Click here to watch our Pride Month series: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLZMbr2AgUIlmq43dduwvqB7ZtIBZdAVEXhttps://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLZMbr2AgUIln_rho8JUhCXgYzxn6z6dR7Click here for more details on our Psychodynamic Workshop: https://centredself.ca/psychodynamic-workshopClick here to sign up for our Psychodynamic Workshop: https://centredself.ca/contactOr email us: therapy@centredself.caHosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram:@yourtherapistisnotokay
Have you seen the morning routine trend videos that are everywhere? 😂 Well, this week we’re talking about the concept of self-actualization.
The constant striving to be better, do better and reach what #DrRickenHale says is #TheYouYouAre, but what do therapists really think about it?
In this episode, Jess and Ryan dive into the self-help book hype, wellness trends, the origin of the concept of self-actualization and what it actually entails.
Tune in for our light-hearted take on this broad, often misunderstood concept ✨
Click here for more details on our Psychodynamic Workshop: https://centredself.ca/psychodynamic-workshop
Click here to sign up for our Psychodynamic Workshop: https://centredself.ca/contact
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram:@yourtherapistisnotokay
After a flood of comments on one of our social posts about lying in therapy, Jess and Ryan dive into a topic that clearly hit a nerve: the fear of being involuntarily committed.
In this episode, we unpack why so many people hold back or lie in therapy out of fear of being hospitalized against their will. We read some of the heartbreaking comments we received and talk about how to bring up difficult topics with your therapist - especially when you’re unsure how they’ll react. We explore where these fears come from, what the actual criteria for involuntary commitment are, and how to build safety and trust in the therapeutic relationship.
Tune in for this extremely important conversation 🎙️
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram:@yourtherapistisnotokay
In this episode, Jess and Ryan get into the theory behind why this is such a popular therapy trope and the pressures that come with wanting to have kids while worrying about passing on trauma to the next generation. Plus, they dive into the guilt and pressure clients sometimes feel to portray their parents as perfect, even when that might not be the reality. Tune in as we explore the messy dynamics between therapy, family, and the emotional challenges we face when trying to break generational patterns ✨
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram:@yourtherapistisnotokay
From viral self-help hacks to controversial "miracle cures," there's no shortage of promises for quick mental health fixes. But do therapists actually believe that they work? 🤔
This week, we're joined by EMDR expert Gina Lihou, RP, to explore the reality behind some of these solutions. She lets us in on the truth about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) - two evidence-based approaches that seemingly work for many.
We are also briefly joined by Monica Lau, RP, as she discusses the use of psychedelics in therapy and the reality of what she deals with in her office everyday.
Tune in as we separate fact from fiction and discuss what a holistic approach to healing looks like in therapy ✨
To learn more about EMDR from Gina, click here: https://youtu.be/swXmrIRSsVI
To learn more about other modalities, click here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qt6ovu7v4Lc&t=5s&ab_channel=CentredSelfPsychotherapy
Click here to book a free EMDR consult with Gina: https://centredself.ca/contact
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
Why do men often avoid therapy? 🤔
In this episode, Jess and Ryan dig deep into the reasons behind men’s struggles with seeking help both in and out of the therapy room.
They also discuss ways to make therapy more accessible, relatable, and welcoming for men, breaking down the stigma and encouraging emotional growth for everyone ✨
Click here to book a FREE consult with us: https://centredself.ca/contact
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
Is it possible to overshare in therapy? 🤔
In this episode, Jess and Ryan dive into the so-called
‘taboo’ topics of the therapy room, why therapists rarely see anything as off-limits, and why it’s just as important to share as it is to give yourself grace when you’re not ready.
Tune in for an open and honest conversation about vulnerability, TMI, and self-compassion ✨
Click here for our videos on Body Dysmorphia During Pride:
https://youtu.be/jAy5MCXfXyI?si=tdsZibBPqDxbq01r
https://youtu.be/mVTG2vLAyvs?si=cUQXvT7nOcd7sIoe
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram: @yourtherapistisnotokay
n this special rapid-fire Q&A episode, we’re tackling the questions you sent in on Instagram. We tackled questions like: do therapists ever get tired of hearing about other people’s problems? How do therapists handle avoidant attachment clients? Who’s our dream podcast guest? And more!Tune in for honest answers, unexpected insights, and maybe even a little bit of therapist tea! 🍵
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram:@yourtherapistisnotokay
Social media has brought therapy into the mainstream, making conversations about mental health way more accessible than ever before. But has it also made us too quick to diagnose ourselves and others?
In this episode, Jess and Ryan explore how platforms like TikTok and Instagram shape our understanding of mental health — from the popularization of attachment theory to the rise of self-diagnosis.
Tune in to find out how to balance the good side of #therapytok with the not-so-good ✨
Click here for Jess' blog posts on Borderline Personality Disorder:
https://centredself.ca/articles/f/borderline-personality-disorder-bpd-what-is-it-really
https://centredself.ca/articles/f/bpd-is-shamed-but-shouldnt-be-3-amazing-qualities-of-bpd
Hosted by: Dr Ryan Bittinger (they/them) and Dr Jess Erb (she/her)
Cover art by: Una Grace Norona (she/her)
Produced and edited by: Denise Danda (she/her)
Follow us on Instagram:@yourtherapistisnotokay