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We're Dating the Same Guy
Madden Zappa
31 episodes
1 day ago
We're Dating the Same Guy uncovers the dating patterns we all repeat—whether we realize it or not—and, more importantly, how to break them. From attachment styles and intimacy to feminine and masculine energy, red flags, self-sabotage, and rebuilding your relationship with yourself, we dive deep into what’s really driving your love life. With expert guests and real-life dating stories, these raw, eye-opening conversations will help you stop dating on autopilot. If we don’t change our patterns, we’re just dating the same guy… over and over again. It’s time to date differently.
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Relationships
Society & Culture
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All content for We're Dating the Same Guy is the property of Madden Zappa and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
We're Dating the Same Guy uncovers the dating patterns we all repeat—whether we realize it or not—and, more importantly, how to break them. From attachment styles and intimacy to feminine and masculine energy, red flags, self-sabotage, and rebuilding your relationship with yourself, we dive deep into what’s really driving your love life. With expert guests and real-life dating stories, these raw, eye-opening conversations will help you stop dating on autopilot. If we don’t change our patterns, we’re just dating the same guy… over and over again. It’s time to date differently.
Show more...
Relationships
Society & Culture
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EP 10: Why Your Brain Keeps Choosing the Wrong Partners: The Trauma Connection
We're Dating the Same Guy
33 minutes 35 seconds
5 months ago
EP 10: Why Your Brain Keeps Choosing the Wrong Partners: The Trauma Connection

This powerful episode with Dr. Linnea Swanson, MFT and brain spotting trainer, explores how trauma becomes encoded in our nervous system and unconsciously guides our relationship choices. Learn why that "spark" might actually be a warning sign, how generational trauma impacts dating patterns, and practical strategies to rewire your brain for healthier relationships. Essential listening for anyone wondering why they keep attracting the same type of partner despite wanting something different.


EPISODE TIMELINE

  • 00:00 - Introduction to Dr. Linnea and her work
  • 04:36 - Understanding trauma and its impact on relationships
  • 09:12 - How the limbic system affects dating choices
  • 14:47 - The unconscious pull toward familiar relationship dynamics
  • 19:42 - Generational trauma and its hidden influence
  • 24:30 - Why the "spark" might signal danger, not compatibility
  • 28:15 - Breaking trauma patterns and dating differently
  • 32:08 - Final advice for healthier relationship choices


IN THIS EPISODE WE EXPLORE

  • How trauma gets encoded in your brain and body, creating unconscious relationship patterns
  • Why perpetrators and victims continue to find each other, even in a room of 100 people
  • The truth about "chemistry" and why that initial spark might be your trauma recognizing something familiar
  • Practical strategies to slow down, balance emotions with logic, and build relationships that grow rather than ignite


"Trauma, essentially, the core of it is that it's an experience that a person has that completely overwhelms their system. And our brain's number one job is to keep us alive. So what happens during a traumatic experience is that there's some threat to the person. Maybe it's not actually to their life, but maybe it's some deep emotional threat, some deep psychological threat, right? And so the brain has to mobilize and go into what I think a lot of people are often familiar with, either fleeing the situation, fighting, or freezing"

- Dr. Linnea Swanson


CONNECT WITH DR. LINNEA SWANSON

Linnea Swanson, Psy.D., M.A., LMFT (she/her/hers) is a Brainspotting Trainer and owner of Twinflower Psychological Services, LLC, located on the ancestral land of the Dakhóta people, now known as Minneapolis, MN. Dr. Swanson has been a therapist for over 20 years having worked in school, county, and private practice settings. She recently ended her 17 year teaching career as a professor in several different MFT graduate programs. She is currently in private practice and leads Brainspotting trainings in the U.S. and South Korea. Dr. Swanson’s clinical practice is focused on working with individuals, couples and families. Dr. Swanson has a particular interest in working with adult transracial, transnational adoptees, interracial couples and couples in CNM relationships.


More about Dr. Linnea Swanson and her private practice website: Twinflowerpsych.com


STAY CONNECT WITH MADDEN

Madden's Instagram: @maddenzappa


✨If you loved this episode, don't forget to subscribe and leave a review! And remember, we do not gatekeep when it comes to dating smarter so be sure to share it with a friend!


We're Dating the Same Guy
We're Dating the Same Guy uncovers the dating patterns we all repeat—whether we realize it or not—and, more importantly, how to break them. From attachment styles and intimacy to feminine and masculine energy, red flags, self-sabotage, and rebuilding your relationship with yourself, we dive deep into what’s really driving your love life. With expert guests and real-life dating stories, these raw, eye-opening conversations will help you stop dating on autopilot. If we don’t change our patterns, we’re just dating the same guy… over and over again. It’s time to date differently.