We explore how consumers in Canada can make a complaint about banking services (mortgages, loans, lines of credit, credit cards, joint accounts, etc. etc.) both to their own bank and to third party ombudsmans. Sorry, did you say "ombudsmans"? Yes, I did - we have competing dispute resolution services or "external complaints bodies" in Canada. Why? No reason. But we do our best to tell you how to navigate this Kafka-esque space, what to look for and how to react.