Close your eyes. Imagine a beach. The sand between your toes. The sound of waves. Your eyes are shrouded in unexpectedly detailed eyelashes. Your friend sits beside you. The setting sun brings a new vibrancy to his platinum blonde hair. Two dogs run up to you. You throw a pineapple for them. You are at peace. Your name is Heero Yuy and your animation budget has just been replenished. Okay, enough of that: we have some questions. First of all, where is this beach jungle of Europe? Is total pacifism possible or is it merely schoolgirl naïveté? Why do people love war? Do freaky pointed eyebrows correlate with loving war? What other eyebrow shapes indicate political positions? Can dogs even eat pineapple? A little pineapple as a treat? We carefully research (read: totally make up) answers to these questions and more at the fancy shoujo manga rich girl school where Relena is a student, a teacher, the principal, the school board, the student council president, and the actual president of the whole country. How does she have time to do all that when she has an evil new girlfriend with a car? For our fandom artifact, Kat and Mallory played 1996 Super Nintendo game Mobile Suit Gundam Wing Endless Duel, a game about beating dudes.