When Nestle and Unilever introduced Maggi and Knorr bouillon cubes to West Africa almost 70 years ago, they took over an informal umami market run mostly by women. Before bouillon, we used fermented beans and seeds like iru and ogili, to deepen the flavours of our soups and stews. Today, both Maggi and Knorr market their seasoning cubes to Nigerian women as a means to the end of modern womanhood - a mythical destination where women can do it all in spite of the patriarchy on their necks. However, a closer look at the colonial histories that built these companies tells a different story - a story of marketing language co-opted and cherry-picked from feminist movements to advance corporate gain.