Relationship Anarchy (S5 | E210)
with Josh and Tammy
RELATIONSHIP ANARCY
In this episode of The Open Nesters Podcast, we dive deep into the dynamic and evolving relationship of Tammy and Josh, returning guests who previously shared their experiences with non-monogamy and emotional intimacy. With a lens focused on the complexities of open relationships, they reflect on their journey since their last appearance and how their connection has grown amidst challenges and changes.
Tammy shares her recent move to South Carolina, which marked a significant transition in her life, both geographically and relationally. The conversation opens with an exploration of how long-distance relationships can remain vibrant and fulfilling, particularly through the lens of non-monogamy. Tammy outlines her experiences navigating dating in her new community and how she joyfully discovered a supportive polyamorous community, enhancing her romantic interactions while managing the emotional complexity of her connections with Josh.
EPISODE TIME CODE
3:54 Long-Distance Love Adjustment
11:03 Navigating Jealousy and Attachment
17:31 Understanding Relationship Anarchy
33:29 Embracing New Relationship Structures
44:01 Reflections on Future Relationships
49:49 The Journey of Authentic Living
Josh elaborates on his own emotional journey, revealing the struggles he faced with feelings of jealousy. While Tammy started dating someone new, he found himself grappling with the discomfort that jealousy can bring. He emphasizes the importance of communication and emotional vulnerability in their relationship, drawing parallels between his practices and concepts from the book "Polysecure." This idea of facing pain and discomfort rather than fleeing became a pivotal learning point for both of them, deepening their emotional bond and understanding of each other.
The episode further delves into the concept of relationship anarchy, which Josh explains as a way to redefine connections without the societal pressure of hierarchy. Instead of prioritizing romance over other types of relationships, they discuss how important it is to honor friendships and various forms of intimacy equally. This perspective enables them to form unique, custom connections based on their current needs and desires rather than adhering to traditional relationship scripts.
As they navigate their relationship's complexities, Tammy and Josh candidly discuss the challenges of coming out to friends, family, and even their children regarding their lifestyle choices. They reflect on the varying reactions they received and how important it has been for them to live their truths despite societal norms. Their discussions also touch on the significance of emotional labor in relationships, including how to support one another through discomfort without attempting to "fix" each other's feelings.
Wrapping up the episode, both Tammy and Josh express gratitude for the growth they have experienced individually and as a couple. They highlight that emotional intimacy, honesty, and vulnerability are crucial for maintaining healthy relationships, regardless of their form.