Bella Brooks: How Divorce Led to Self-Discovery and Open Relationships (S5

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The Open Nesters

212 episodes

5 days ago

We are the Open Nesters. We are the Baby Boomers and Gen X’ers who reject the traditional roles that our parents played and the empty nest syndrome. We defy the stigma of ageism, ailing health, empty retirement and a passionless sex life.

Together we explore the journey of re-discovering and reinventing our lives as our grown children leave the nest. We hear about the sides of people that have been left unexplored during a long-term marriage. The mysteries, fantasies and unmet desires and needs are laid wide open at this juncture in their lives. Their empty-nesting chapter in life is anything but empty! It’s an Open Nest, fulfilling, expansive, explorative, and raw. The stories reveal alternative lifestyles and explore how our generation is redefining life on their own terms.

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Bella Brooks: How Divorce Led to Self-Discovery and Open Relationships (S5 | E195)

The Open Nesters

41 minutes 24 seconds

3 months ago

Bella Brooks: How Divorce Led to Self-Discovery and Open Relationships (S5 | E195)

Bella Brooks: How Divorce Led to Self-Discovery and Open Relationships (S5 | E195)

[Tessa]
In this episode of The Open Nesters Podcast, we delve into the transformative journey of open nesting and the richness of personal relationships with Bella Brooks, a sexuality educator and intimacy coach. Bella shares her compelling story of rediscovery following her divorce in 2017, which became a pivotal moment that propelled her into exploring her identity as a part-time empty nester. This experience opened a new chapter in her life, leading her to embrace polyamory and to learn how to navigate relationships as part of her journey towards self-discovery.

TIME CODE

4:56 Navigating Post-Divorce Life
13:49 Trust and Vulnerability in Relationships
29:50 Parenting and Role Modeling
39:50 Embracing Opportunities in Act 3

We explore how Bella's shift in dynamics, especially post-divorce, laid the groundwork for her to redefine intimacy, connection, and pleasure. She discusses the benefits of engaging in diverse relationships that allowed her to "speed date herself," thus gaining clarity on her personal desires and boundaries while also considering the emotional impact on her now-adult children. Bella sheds light on how she balanced co-parenting with a nesting arrangement, providing continuity and stability for her children during a significant family transition.

Much of Bella's transformation stems from her commitment to sexual education and empowerment, which she undertook through an extensive program to become a certified sexuality coach. This educational journey deepened her understanding of intimacy and strengthened her connection with herself, ultimately benefiting her romantic and familial relationships. We discuss how she has always embraced a sex-positive approach with her daughters, emphasizing the importance of open dialogue about sexuality, which contrasts with her upbringing. Through sharing stories and insights, Bella advocates for teaching young individuals about healthy relationships and the significance of body autonomy.

A significant part of our conversation also revolves around the challenges of intimacy, vulnerability, and communication in relationships. Bella provides valuable insights into her practices around consent and boundaries, stressing the importance of fostering an environment of safety and trust in romantic and platonic interactions. Techniques such as "hugging till relaxed" and guided improvisational games help establish deeper connections between individuals, promoting emotional vulnerability in a safe setting.

Furthermore, Bella introduces the concept of cuddle parties, where participants engage in consensual, platonic touch, creating a space for healing and connection. This emphasis on touch, she argues, is crucial in our increasingly isolated world and serves to alleviate stress and anxiety. Our dialogue expands to consider how this practice not only benefits individuals but also enhances relationships by encouraging authentic communication and reducing the societal stigma surrounding tou...