👸🏻 hua hua is a British Chinese artist with an unconventional third cultured kid background. She dropped out of university where she was originally studying philosophy and art history to pursue a lifestyle as an artist. She worked across different industries from film, amnesty international, sex work, gallery work, and more. Today, she is the co-founder of BORDERLINE, a platform dedicated to rope art and activities in China. She believes that rope bondage is a process of exploring our authenticities.
💖 Listen in to learn what it was like learning about her sexuality growing up in the UK with Chinese parents, how she got into Shibari rope art, what she has learned throughout her career in Shibari, and how Shibari can benefit overall intimate sexual wellness for all.
🤯 We did not know these facts before
“Did you know Maya Angelou was a sex worker?”
“Do you know what sugaring is?"
"Do you know some people consider that as sex work?”
(Sugaring is a form of dating in which one partner financially supports the other, often in the form of cash or gifts.)
We are m i n d b l o w n, so let's get to it.
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Topics we discuss in this episode:
- 06:00 Growing up in Europe and how that changed her perspective on sex & intimacy. Family, moms, friends, and people at school.
- 16:50 How did you educate yourself about sex at an all-girls school?
- 19:30 The normalcy of getting tested after every new partner and how different countries approach this. How easy it's to catch STDs, the risks, and how they compare to each other
- 23:00 Discovering porn and how the internet and older siblings facilitated her curiosity
- 24:25 How hua hua discovered Shibari and why China? Hua hua explains its connection with the human body, intimacy, creativity, and pursuing something you have are passionate about with someone else
- 26:50 The role of sex in Shibari: how Shibari helps with being more attentive towards someone's body, have someone look at you in different ways, and helps you become more open in communication
- 29:55: Are there types of people who should be interested in Shibari?
- 34:00 Demisexual, Sapiosexual, and A-sexual people: should they dip their toes into shibari?
- 34:40 The differences in Europe vs China when it comes to Shibari
- 36:30 Surprising fact about Shibari: most people are very conservative, live a very standard life. For them, BDSM is a necessary way to release pleasure
- 38:35 Partners that dislike their partner participating in BDSM
- 40:40 Is BDSM infidelity?
- 44:30 The biggest misconception about Shibari
- 46:10 The benefits of Shibari on overall wellness: how it impacts trust, intimacy, vulnerability, self-awareness, and communication
- 50:20 How can you "dip your toes" into Shibari?
- 54:00 hua hua's biggest takeaways when it comes to sexuality, intimacy, relationships
- 55:10 The inherent Asian/female/immigrant persona that wants to satisfy other people's needs and saying "NO"
- 56:00 hua hua explains her experiences with
