Sexual and gendered violence remains a huge issue here in Australia and around the world. In the past few weeks new research has been published into the trend of sexual strangulation or choking, which is practiced by over 50% of young Australians aged 18-35, mostly consensually. This episode delves into this research, the media response to it, and my hot take on the conversation we’re not having and need to be. The research conducted by The Conversation exposes trends where more men than women are doing the choking/strangulation, more women are receiving it, and more trans and gender diverse peoples are engaged on both sides. There are worrying discrepancies around consent, and most young people are discovering this trend via pornography. The response has been very concerned, focused on the dangers of this sexual practice (which are significant), the problems with the pornography industry, and the need for better consent education. I argue the missing piece of the puzzle when it comes to navigating desire and consent is that a vast majority of girls and women experience low self worth, which makes it extremely difficult to advocate for yourself in the moments where we most need to. If you want to go deeper, my newsletter is the place where I share my deepest insights, longform writing and exclusive subscriber-only offers, you can sign up at www.madeleineeliza.com As always if you enjoyed the show, don’t forget to rate and review and share with your friends to get the word out there. References Alexander, I., Fortenberry, J., Fu, T., Herbenick, D., Hou, J., Huibregtse, M., Kawata, K.,Klemsz, L., Rosenberg, M. 2024 Structural brain morphology in young adult women who have been choked/strangled during sex: A whole-brain surface morphometry study, Brain and Behaviour https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/brb3.3160 Australian Government 2022, New research shows prolific use of dating apps to facilitate sexual violence, Australian Institute of Criminology https://www.aic.gov.au/media-centre/news/new-research-shows-prolific-use-dating-apps-facilitate-sexual-violence Australia’s National Research Organisation for Women’s Safety 2019, Young Australians confused about consent and control in the age of Tinder and Snapchat, ANROWS https://www.anrows.org.au/media-releases/young-australians-confused-about-consent-and-control-in-the-age-of-tinder-and-snapchat/#:~:text=The%20National%20Community%20Attitudes%20towards,raped%20had%20instead%20led%20the Coveney, S. 2022 The gender gap in mental health, News Medical Life Sciences https://www.news-medical.net/health/The-Gender-Gap-in-Mental-Health.aspx#:~:text=Adolescent%20girls%20have%20a%20substantially,risk%20behaviors%2C%20and%20commit%20suicide Dove, The 2017 Dove Global Girls Beauty and Confidence Report https://digitaluniversity.womendeliver.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/Mod-1-2017-Dove-Global-Girls-Beauty-and-Confidence-Report.pdf Orenstein, P. 2024, The Troubling Trend in Teenage Sex, The New York Times https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/12/opinion/choking-teen-sex-brain-damage.html Sharman, L., Fitzgerald, R. & Douglas, H. 2024: Prevalence of Sexual Strangulation/Choking Among Australian 18–35 Year-Olds, Archives of Sexual Behaviour, Springer Link https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-024-02937-y#auth-Robin-Fitzgerald-Aff2 Sharman, L., Fitzgerald, R. & Douglas, H. 2024: More than half of Australian young people are using strangulation during sex: new research, The Conversation https://theconversation.com/more-than-half-of-australian-young-people-are-using-strangulation-during-sex-new-research-231269