In this episode, Michelle Renee and Vanessa Cushing discuss their experience working together in the triadic model of therapy, specifically surrogate partner therapy. They explore the meaning of saying 'I love you' and the nuances of expressing love authentically. They also discuss the importance of digging deeper in therapy and using conversation cards to spark meaningful conversations. They highlight the evolution of surrogate partner therapy and its impact on clients' lives. The episode concludes with a discussion on the experience of feeling loved in therapy. This conversation explores the goal and benefits of surrogate partner therapy, the importance of therapist involvement, and the challenges and rewards of working in a triadic model. It emphasizes the value of community and the role of supervision in supporting the therapist and client. The conversation also highlights the need for clear boundaries and the impact of personal experiences on the therapeutic relationship. It concludes with a discussion on the satisfaction and positive outcomes of surrogate partner therapy, as well as the importance of expanding the definition of this approach. In this final part of the conversation, Michelle and Vanessa express their appreciation for each other and their friendship. They discuss the possibility of working together again in the future and express their excitement about meeting in person. They conclude the conversation with a warm exchange of gratitude and well wishes.

Takeaways

• Expressing love authentically is more important than saying 'I love you' out of obligation.
• Digging deeper in therapy can lead to transformative experiences and personal growth.
• Surrogate partner therapy can provide unique support and opportunities for growth in areas of emotional and physical intimacy.
• The triadic model of therapy allows for collaboration and a holistic approach to addressing clients' needs.
• Feeling loved and cared for in therapy can have a profound impact on clients' self-worth and well-being. Surrogate partner therapy aims to help clients learn and generalize skills outside of the therapy setting.
• Therapist involvement in surrogate partner therapy provides additional support and guidance for clients.
• Working in a triadic model allows for checks and balances and helps ensure the client's progress and growth.
• The therapist's personal experiences and boundaries play a significant role in the therapeutic relationship.
• Surrogate partner therapy can lead to positive outcomes and significant personal growth for both the client and therapist. Expressing gratitude and appreciation for colleagues and friends is important.
• Building and maintaining professional relationships can lead to future collaborations.
• Meeting in person can strengthen connections and create a sense of familiarity.
• Closing a conversation with gratitude and well wishes leaves a positive impression.

Vanessa Cushing (she/her) is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Miami, licensed in both Florida and Virginia. Her specialty is in sexual trauma. You can find out more about Vanessa at https://www.cushingcounseling.com and follow her at https://instagram.com/cushingcounseling.

Michelle Renee (she/her) is a San Diego-based Intimacy Guide and Surrogate Partner. Michelle's website is ⁠https://meetmichellerenee.com⁠ and can be found on social media at @meetmichellerenee.

Notes from this episode:

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Nathan Young

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Andrew Heartman

Psychnetworker

Cuddlist Training

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Andrew's Heartman's Class Collaborating with Surrogate Partners in Triadic Model through SurrogatePartnerCollective.org

Akilah Riley Richardson

Brian Gibney

Somatic Sexuality Professionals

Tamara Pincus

Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker

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