Today’s guest is a negotiation coach with over a decade of helping clients with more than 10,000 negotiations ranging from $10K to $250MM. They also founded and ran their own successful business for more than a dozen years before successfully exiting. Allan Tsang is the Fractional Chief Negotiation Officer at 88 Owls, CEO at Oblinger & Tsang, and Co-author of Negotiation Mythbusters. Allen busted tons of myths about how leaders should use empathy, why ego is so important in setting boundaries, and why leadership and negotiations are so closely related.    Takeaways: There are three main forms of empathy, Cognitive, Compassionate, and Emotional. As a leader, you can have the wrong type of empathy. Leaders need Cognitive empathy to be able to recognize how others feel and how it impacts things like conflict resolution.  As a leader, you should use your Cognitive empathy as a doctor would. This means that you can realize there is a problem and can work to resolve it rather than feeling how someone else feels about the problem and feeling sad for them. Leaders need to have a strong sense of self and a necessary part of that is ego. Too much or too little ego can be dangerous. A strong sense of self gives leaders the confidence to set boundaries in order to deliver and receive feedback.  So many leaders worry about how to inspire their teams to work together. However, those leaders should be spending more time working on themselves by learning about things like regulating their emotions, active listening, and making effective decisions. In negotiations, the other side will try to use your empathy against you by trying to make you feel sorry for them. If you sense that the other party is trying to play on your emotions, you need to be careful. Having a team in the negotiation can help with this. In order to improve as a leader, coach, and mentor, you need to become better at negotiating. This will help you resolve disputes, build collaboration, cultivate relationships, and deliver feedback.    Quote of the Show: “Leaders have to learn how to deliver and also receive feedback, it's a two-way street” - Allan Tsang   Links: LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/allantsang/  Email: allan@88owls.com  Twitter: https://twitter.com/88owls  88 Owls website: https://www.88owls.com/  Oblinger & Tsang website: https://www.oblingertsang.com/  Negotiation Mythbusters: https://www.amazon.com/Negotiation-Mythbusters-Rethinking-Everything-Agreements/dp/B09KN2P8GZ    Shout Outs: Jim Camp Start with No by Jim Camp Todd Camp Stalling for Time by Gary Noesner Life or Death Listening by Dan Oblinger   Ways to Tune In: Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/b9436ea0-3e54-4c2d-a555-43e6ac890787 Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-impactful-leadership-show/id1608566236 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/39cdJjxlfGrGXreE7r8OBm Google Podcast: https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkLnBvZGJlYW4uY29tL2ltcGFjdGZ1bGxlYWRlcnNoaXAvZmVlZC54bWw iHeartRadio: https://iheart.com/podcast/95281596 PlayerFM: https://player.fm/series/3352055 YouTube: https://youtu.be/l3DQEed_ido    The Impactful Leadership Show is sponsored by the DC Chapter of the Entrepreneurs’ Organization. Learn more at https://www.eodcnetwork.org/home  The Impactful Leadership Show is produced by Ringmaster, on a mission to create connections through B2B podcasts. Learn more at https://ringmaster.com/