What happens when a lifetime of people-pleasing, perfectionism, and performance keeps you from honoring your sensitivity? In this episode, I sit down with Sara Bybee Fisk, a coach, mentor, and expert in helping women unlearn rampant people-pleasing, perfectionism, and codependency. Together, we unpack what it means to reclaim your sensitivity after years of being told to toughen up, give more, and need less. Sara shares her journey from being programmed as an extrovert in a large, service-focused family and religious culture to discovering the quiet power of her sensitivity. She opens up about the grief that comes with realizing your sensitive nature was never honored and the healing that happens when you finally allow both the joy and the sadness to coexist. This conversation explores how nervous system responses like fawning, freezing, or over-functioning aren’t character flaws, they’re biology. And with compassion and curiosity, you can begin to shift from shame and blame into true self-understanding. In this episode, we explore:✨ The moments that revealed Sara’s sensitivity and the grief that followed✨ How people-pleasing hides behind overachievement, self-sufficiency, and constant giving✨ Why our nervous system, not our willpower, decides how we react under stress✨ How curiosity and compassion become antidotes to shame and self-criticism✨ The power of the word AND: honoring both your need to connect and your need to rest Resources & Links: 🩷 Connect with Sara: sarafisk.coach 🩷 Listen to Sara’s podcast: The Ex-Good Girl Podcast 🩷 Follow Sara on Instagram: @sarafiskcoach Learn more about coaching with me by sending a message to info@allyssya.coach. If this episode resonated with you, share it with another woman learning to hold her sensitivity with compassion. And don’t forget to follow and leave a review. It helps other sensitive souls find this space. 🩵

There was a time when I would’ve done anything not to be so sensitive, when every emotional reaction or physical discomfort felt like a flaw I needed to fix. But over time, something shifted. Today, I hold my sensitivity with reverence. This episode is all about that transformation - the honest, often messy journey that took me from resistance and resentment to eventual acceptance, and what it really means to embrace your sensitive nature. Over the past few months, I’ve heard from so many of you about your experiences with sensitivity and your feedback inspired this conversation. Some of you have shared that you were hesitant to listen at first because you’ve always seen being “highly sensitive” as a negative thing. Others said you’ve been cautious about sharing the podcast with people in your life because you worry it might be misunderstood or taken personally. And some of you said you didn’t think you were a highly sensitive woman at all, but through listening, you finally found language for things you’ve felt your whole life. All of that has reminded me just how misunderstood sensitivity can be even for those of us who are sensitive. So in this episode, I’m walking you through the stages of my own acceptance journey: the resistance, the resentment, the gradual understanding, and finally, the reverence. We’ll talk about:🩵 What it looks like to move through the stages of acceptance as a highly sensitive woman 🩵 How resistance and shame can show up early on and why that’s completely normal 🩵 The difference between accepting your sensitivity and revering it 🩵 Why reverence doesn’t mean it’s always easy (including a recent story about my fragrance allergy and a borrowed hoodie!) 🩵 How to honor your sensitivity even when it’s inconvenient or frustrating By the end, you’ll have a clearer sense of where you are in your own journey. Because here’s the truth: having reverence for your sensitivity doesn’t mean pretending it’s all light and ease. It means respecting it deeply enough to hold space for both the beauty and the challenges. If you’re in that messy middle space, somewhere between resistance and reverence, coaching can help you navigate your sensitivity with more confidence and ease. Schedule a consultation at info@allyssya.coach.

There’s a certain kind of discomfort that comes with growth, but for many highly sensitive women, that discomfort can feel like too much, too fast. When our confidence is low, we often convince ourselves that the only way forward is to change everything at once… to become someone louder, bolder, or less sensitive. But that approach often backfires, leaving us retreating into self-doubt, convinced we’ve failed yet again.   This episode is an invitation to do it differently. You’ll learn how to nurture confidence that grows roots and holds steady, even when life tilts a little.   🩵 Growth happens in micro-doses, not massive leaps. You’ll hear how to take small, controlled steps outside your comfort zone, the kind that stretch you without overwhelming your system. 🩵 Low self-esteem thrives in silence. You’ll learn how curiosity can help you interrupt harsh self-talk in real time and why this builds self-trust, the foundation of lasting confidence. 🩵 Perfectionism keeps many HSPs from even starting. You’ll explore how to measure effort instead of outcome, celebrate progress, and release impossible standards that drain your self-worth. 🩵 Confidence rooted in performance is fragile. Confidence rooted in self-worth is unshakable. You’ll discover small daily practices that remind you that you are enough simply because you exist.   Growth that honors your sensitivity is the kind that lasts.   Want to connect and learn more about bolstering your self-esteem?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@allyssya.coach.

There was a time when even leaving the house felt like too much. Fast forward to now, I can attend a social event, connect with people, and come home still feeling calm and energized.   In this episode, I’m sharing what changed: the power of regulation. We’ll explore how learning to manage your energy and senses doesn’t just help you cope, it expands your ability to live, connect, and enjoy more of what you love without burning out.   You’ll hear how this progression unfolded for me and I moved from isolation and anxiety to confidence and ease. And I’ll share how the same transformation is happening for my clients as they learn to work with their nervous systems, not against them.   If you’ve ever wondered why some days feel manageable while others feel like too much, this conversation will help you understand what’s really going on beneath the surface and how to shift from depletion to expansion through the power of regulation.   You’ll Learn:   🩵 What regulation actually means and how it differs from “pushing through” 🩵 Why managing your energy and senses is key to expanding your capacity 🩵 How small regulation habits create big shifts in confidence and connection   Want to connect and learn more about regulating your nervous system so you can enjoy life?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

Sometimes we don’t even realize we’re people-pleasing because it’s happening automatically. It’s not about trying to impress or gain approval anymore; it’s about the deeply wired instinct to anticipate and adjust for others before they even ask. In this episode, I share a personal story that opened my eyes to just how quietly this habit can shape our choices. We’ll explore: 🩵 Why people-pleasing can become an unconscious survival pattern 🩵 How to recognize when you’re accommodating out of assumption, not need 🩵 Simple ways to pause, check in, and re-anchor in what you actually want 🩵 How to practice small moments of authenticity, even when it feels uncomfortable You’ll walk away with practical tools and a reminder that awareness is enough to begin the unlearning process. Because when no one’s asking, you’re allowed to stop pleasing and start being. Want to connect and learn more about how to stop people pleasing?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

How often do you catch yourself saying “I’m sorry”? Maybe it slips out when you miss a call, ask for something you need, or simply take up space. While “sorry” can be powerful when it’s sincere, over-apologizing can quietly chip away at your confidence and sense of worth.   In this episode, I uncover: 🩵 Why “sorry” has become a reflex for so many of us 🩵 Three common ways we misuse apologies 🩵 The difference between a true apology and a habitual one 🩵 Simple swaps that replace “sorry” with gratitude or honesty You’ll walk away with practical ways to shift your language so it reflects your truth and honors your worth. Because you don’t need to apologize for existing.   Want to connect and learn more about reclaiming your words and worth?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

Ever wondered, Who am I really meant to be? For many highly sensitive women, societal “shoulds” and outside expectations drown out our inner voice, leaving us unsure of our true purpose.   In this episode of The Highly Sensitive Woman, I share a gentle reframe to help you rediscover who you truly are and uncover the purpose that’s been waiting inside you all along. Together, we’ll explore why identity and purpose can feel so elusive, the cost of losing connection with yourself, and simple practices that will help you find your way back to alignment.   In this episode, you’ll learn:   ✨Why sensitivity can make it harder to hear your own voice over outside expectations ✨The hidden costs of living by someone else’s version of your life ✨A fresh perspective on identity and purpose that creates more freedom, not pressure ✨Gentle, practical steps to reconnect with who you’re meant to be   You don’t have to chase purpose, it grows as you listen to yourself. Each small step you take to honor your true self naturally reveals more of your authentic path.   Want to connect and learn more about discovering your purpose?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

How often has it felt risky to show up as your true self? For many highly sensitive women, all emotions spill out in tears. While that can feel vulnerable or even “too much,” your tears aren’t a weakness; they’re proof of your authenticity.   The three key practices that help highly sensitive women feel safe being their true selves:   🩵 Redefine what tears mean: they’re a release valve 🩵 Create inner safety first: learn simple practices to ground yourself and calm your nervous system 🩵 Communicate with others: naming your emotions helps build compassion and connection   Your emotions aren’t something to hide, they’re part of your courage, presence, and humanity.   Want to connect and learn more about embracing your tears?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

If you’ve ever walked into a room and felt your senses go into overdrive - the noise, the chatter, the energy - it can feel like too much. Before long, your body is overwhelmed, your inner critic is loud, and you leave drained and disappointed.   In this episode of The Highly Sensitive Woman, I’m sharing a personal story from a women’s retreat and three practical tips to help you protect your energy, manage sensory overload, and approach these moments with more self-kindness.   You’ll learn: ✨ How to notice and name which sense is being overstimulated ✨ Simple ways to give your body and mind a restorative break ✨ Why releasing shame after the fact helps preserve your energy   Whether you choose to leave, step away for a break, or stay and soak up the experience, you’ll walk away from this episode with encouragement and maybe even the permission you didn’t know you needed to take up space and honor your needs without apology.   Want to connect and learn more about protecting your energy to limit sensory overload?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?    ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

Have you ever tried to use the wrong tool for the job? It might work for a while, but eventually things fall apart. The tool itself isn’t broken; it’s just being used in a way for which it wasn’t designed.   That’s exactly what happens for highly sensitive women when we try to operate like the other 80% of the population. Instead of honoring the way we’re wired, we push ourselves to fit in, and when it doesn’t work, we turn on ourselves with criticism.   In this episode of The Highly Sensitive Woman, I’m exploring how self-criticism quietly drains your confidence, why it shows up so often for HSPs, and what it costs us emotionally, practically, and relationally. Most importantly, I’ll share how you can begin shifting that inner voice from criticism to curiosity, and from self-doubt to self-trust.   What you’ll learn in this episode:   🌟 Why using the wrong “tool” is the perfect metaphor for self-criticism 🌟 The sneaky ways self-criticism convinces us it’s helpful 🌟 The hidden costs of misusing your sensitivity 🌟 A practical reframe to quiet your critical voice and rebuild confidence 🌟 Simple steps to honor your sensitivity and thrive   If you’re ready to stop misusing your strengths and start honoring the way you’re designed, this episode will give you both encouragement and the practical steps to begin.    Want to connect and learn more about quieting the critical voice and building confidence from a place of self-compassion?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

Have you ever agreed to something you didn’t want to do, stayed quiet when something bothered you, or found yourself overexplaining your “no” just to soften the impact? These small moments might seem harmless, but over time they can lead to frustration, disconnection, and deep resentment in your relationships.   In this episode of The Highly Sensitive Woman, I’m exploring how weak boundaries quietly create resentment, and why strengthening your boundaries is actually a pathway to more authentic, fulfilling connections.   You’ll learn:   🩵 Why resentment is often a signal of crossed boundaries 🩵 The subtle, everyday signs of weak boundaries you might not even notice 🩵 How honoring your limits strengthens relationships instead of damaging them 🩵 Practical steps to set boundaries without guilt or overexplaining   If you’ve ever felt depleted, frustrated, or unappreciated in your relationships, this episode will help you recognize what’s really happening underneath and give you the tools to start creating more space for yourself and for deeper connection with others.   Want to connect and learn more about setting boundaries?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

Sometimes the smallest change in how we see things can make the biggest difference. What if someone’s sharp tone wasn’t about you at all? What if “different” didn’t mean “wrong”? Our perspective can either weigh us down or set us free.   In this episode, I’m sharing 4 gentle perspective shifts that will help you lighten your emotional load and bring more peace to your daily life.   I’m discussing:   ✨ Why noticing subtle cues is a gift and how to stop carrying meaning that isn’t yours ✨ A freeing reminder that different doesn’t equal wrong ✨ How to release ownership of other people’s reactions ✨ The surprising peace that comes from choosing neutral   Want to connect and learn more about shifting your perspective?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

Have you ever been complimented on something -  an outfit, a choice, a way of being - and deep down thought, “This isn’t even me”?   As highly sensitive women, we’re often praised for the roles we play: the versions of ourselves carefully constructed to gain approval, keep the peace, or fit in. But what happens when the life you’re living doesn’t actually feel like yours?   In this episode, I’m peeling back the layers of people-pleasing and performance to help you reconnect with the real you, the one who’s been there all along. Together, we’ll explore why it can feel so hard to know ourselves as HSPs, and I’ll share gentle, practical ways to tune into your truth and start becoming who you’ve always been.   What You’ll Learn in This Episode:   ✨ Why highly sensitive women often lose touch with their authentic selves ✨ How to use a “Not Me” list to get clear on what doesn’t belong to you ✨ Ways to spot subtle moments when you’re performing instead of being ✨ How to trust your body’s wisdom when making decisions ✨ The power of reconnecting with forgotten joys to rediscover your inner compass   Becoming who you’ve always been isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about peeling back what isn’t you — and remembering who you’ve always been underneath.   Want to connect and learn more about becoming who you’ve always been?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

Are you stuck in “just one more” podcast, book, or course, waiting until you feel perfectly ready? As highly sensitive women, we often love to be prepared, and we’re really good at it.   In this episode, I'm talking about how perfectionism keeps highly sensitive women playing small, and the gentle, doable steps you can take to grow… even when it feels messy.   You’ll walk away with tangible tools, reflection prompts, and a reminder that courage isn’t about being ready; it’s about moving forward even when you’re not.   What You’ll Learn:   🩵 The surprising reason perfectionism feels safe for highly sensitive women 🩵 How to reframe your comfort zone as a place of rest, not residence 🩵 4 subtle signs perfectionism might be running the show 🩵 Three gentle practices to help you take brave, imperfect action 🩵 Reflection prompts to help you uncover where you’re hiding in preparation   Links & Resources Mentioned in This Episode:   Episode 3: Don’t Let Overwhelm Steal Your Joy. 6 Strategies to Increase Distress Tolerance and Reduce Anxiety   Episode 14: Expand Your Capacity by Protecting Your Energy   Episode 23: Overstimulated? 6 Tactical Ways to Calm Your Senses   If this episode spoke to you, share it with a friend who might need the encouragement. And if you take one brave action this week, I’d love to hear about it so we can celebrate together! Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com

Have you ever been in a space where everything suddenly feels like too much? The lights. The noise. The energy. As a highly sensitive woman, sensory overload might not be occasional — it might be part of your daily life.   In this episode, I’m sharing six nervous system-friendly tools you can use in the moment to soothe your senses and bring yourself back into regulation without needing to push through or shut down. These aren’t the same tips you’ve heard over and over… they’re simple, accessible, and truly effective.   If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed in a grocery store, a crowded gathering, or even just your own home, this episode will leave you feeling supported and empowered.   What You’ll Learn: 🩵 Why sensory overload isn’t a sign of weakness, but a message from your nervous system 🩵 A powerful mindset shift that can reframe how you view overstimulation 🩵 Six real-time sensory regulation toolsYou’re not “too sensitive.” You’re deeply in tune with your environment — and that’s a gift. These tools are here to help you honor that sensitivity, not fight against it. If this episode resonated with you, share it with another sensitive soul who might need it today. And if you haven’t yet, I’d love for you to leave a review — your words help others find this space, too. Want to connect and learn more about regulating your senses?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?    ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

Do you feel guilty saying “no”? Are you constantly putting other people’s needs ahead of your own? As a highly sensitive woman, you might be caught in the exhausting cycle of people-pleasing, unclear boundaries, and inner turmoil. But here’s the truth: setting healthy boundaries isn’t selfish—it’s the key to protecting your energy and creating the peace you’ve been craving. In this episode, I’m breaking down: Why highly sensitive women often become people-pleasers. The real cost of living without boundaries—resentment, stress, and emotional exhaustion. What healthy boundaries really look like (hint: they build deeper, more trusting connections). Simple, practical strategies to start setting boundaries without guilt. How to deal with pushback and unlock the freedom that comes with protecting your peace. You’ll walk away with clear steps to begin honoring your needs and creating a life that feels aligned, calm, and authentic. If you’re ready for personalized support, schedule a consultation with me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com. Together, we’ll create a plan to help you set boundaries with confidence and finally step into the life you deserve.

In this heartfelt and empowering episode, I’m getting real about what it means to be a highly sensitive woman. From personal experiences to powerful insights, I’m sharing why sensitivity is not something that needs to be fixed, but rather, something to be celebrated.   We’ll explore how the world has conditioned many of us to believe our deep emotions and big feelings are flaws, and I’ll offer a different perspective: one where your sensitivity is your strength.   What You’ll Learn: 🩵 The truth behind emotional depth and why it’s a sign of emotional intelligence 🩵 How your sensitivity fuels empathy and powerful connection 🩵 The link between sensitivity, intuition, and creativity 🩵 Why highly sensitive women are thoughtful, wise decision-makers 🩵 How sensitivity paves the way for deep, meaningful relationships If you’ve ever wished you could tone it down or wondered if you were just “too much,” this episode is for you.   Let’s Connect: If this episode resonated with you, I’d love to hear from you! Reach out on Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya, share your thoughts in a review, or send this to a fellow sensitive soul who needs to hear it.

Because sometimes we all need a moment to catch our breath, The Highly Sensitive Woman podcast is taking a break. I'll be back on July 24th with new episodes. Until then, listen to some of your favorites or get caught up on episodes you may have missed.   Want to connect with me and other Highly Sensitive Women?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.

How often do you let other people decide how your time together will unfold — what you’ll do, when you’ll do it, even what you’ll talk about? You show up, but you leave feeling empty, unfulfilled, and disconnected — like you can’t fully be yourself. Today, I’m pulling back the curtain on how this subtle form of people-pleasing keeps you from building the deep, meaningful connections you truly crave — and what to do instead. In this episode, we’re diving into one of the most overlooked ways people-pleasing shows up — by constantly deferring to what others want, especially in your relationships. Whether it’s family, friends, or romantic partners, this pattern of keeping your desires hidden prevents others from truly knowing — and accepting — the real you.   I’ll share a personal story of how I broke that cycle with an incredibly vulnerable conversation, how I prepared for it, and how even when it didn’t go perfectly, it was still completely worth it. Because when you plant seeds of authenticity, that’s when real connection begins.   If You’ve Ever… ✔️ Felt unseen or unfulfilled after spending time with someone ✔️ Struggled to express your wants, needs, or preferences ✔️ Worried that speaking up might rock the boat or cause rejection …this episode is for you.   Let’s Connect:If today’s conversation resonated with you, I’d love to hear your thoughts or experiences. Reach out on Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya, Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya, or info@lifecoachallyssya.com and let me know how you’re creating more authentic connections in your life.  

We all experience those moments when self-doubt creeps in — sometimes it’s triggered by a specific event, and other times it shows up uninvited, with no clear reason at all. The important part is what happens next. Do we let that doubt take over, or do we make a conscious choice to shift toward confidence? In this episode, we’re diving into practical ways to help you do just that. In this Part 2 episode, I’m sharing five more simple, yet powerful tactics you can use today to boost your confidence and reignite your self-belief. Whether you’re stuck in a low-confidence moment or simply want to feel even better, these tools are designed to meet you where you are. In this episode, you’ll learn: ✨ The science-backed power of Power Posing — and how standing like an “X” for just two minutes can change your mood and presence ✨ How to build trust with yourself by setting and keeping small promises — even something as simple as drinking a glass of water or limiting your social media time ✨ The magic of revisiting compliments and creating a “You Did That” celebration list to remind yourself of your wins ✨ Why doing one thing you're good at — no matter how small — can instantly remind you of your capability ✨ The reflective power of writing a letter to your younger or future self, and how this practice can help you find compassion and clarity Remember: Not every tool will feel doable all the time, and that’s okay. The key is to explore, experiment, and discover what works for you — today, and as you continue to grow. If you missed Part 1, be sure to go back and check out the first five confidence-boosting tactics I shared! You’ve got this — and you’re more capable than you think.   Want to connect and learn more about boosting your confidence?   ➡️ Share your wins and aha moments on this week’s post on: Facebook: Life Coaching with Allyssya or Instagram: @lifecoach_allyssya   Ready to begin your journey of self-acceptance?  ➡️ Let’s discover what’s getting in the way and create a plan that feels right for you. Message me at info@lifecoachallyssya.com.