Why You Should Stop Delaying Your Divorce and Get on With It Already

Hi everyone, this is Erin and today's topic is, “Why You Should Stop Delaying Your Divorce and Get on With It Already.” If I sound a little off it's because I have a cold and so I'm hoping that I will still speak clearly enough that you can understand what I'm saying and not be too annoyed by my nasally voice. I literally never get a cold, so this has been beyond annoying and I'm really having a hard time accepting the fact that I actually have one, but I do and so there it is, let's get on with our topic. So I bring up this topic because the last, let's see, maybe eight or nine calls we've got on Hello Divorce, have been from really nice folks who tell me that they'd been separated from their spouse for a really long time. They know divorce is inevitable, but they liken it to going to the dentist or other things that you might want to put off. Because let's face it, divorce is not that fun and there's so many excuses, many of which seem really fair in the moment, right?

Like, my kids are too busy, divorce will cost too much, everything's going smooth right now, I don't want us to start fighting. Will this mess up the kids? The divorce process will take forever won't it? Will I have to go to court? Will I have to hire a lawyer? And so on and so on. And while these are all really valid questions, I do want you to understand that in many cases it actually makes sense for you to move through your divorce now, for financial reasons and legal reasons, but emotionally too. You know if you look back on your life, emotional baggage gets really heavy and the stress of staying in a marriage that isn't working or not getting divorced, but knowing that you need to, it does take a toll on your mental and physical health. I've read so much research, especially from John Gottman about how couples that are enduring marital stress are more likely to experience psychiatric disorders, like depression and even increase the risk of heart problems.

So financial and legal issues aside, I don't want you to discount the fact that not getting a divorce, but knowing that you need to, can really weigh heavily on you, transition is hard. And so if for that reason alone, I just want you to think about it and now I'll move on to the more obvious stuff like the legal and financial stuff...

If you have any questions please reach out to us at hellodivorce.com