The Art of Charm is where self-motivated people, just like you, come to learn from the company’s coaches about to how to master human dynamics, relationships, and becoming your best self with the help of Johnny and AJ, the company’s founders. Johnny and AJ bring their 11 years of coaching experience from their famous Bootcamps, where they host clients in Los Angeles from all over the world and they share their stories, best practices and themselves on this weekly podcast. Not only does The Art of Charm help everyday people, including active members of the military, learn how to become higher performers, better spouses, partners, and coworkers, they dig deep into human behavior, the science behind it, and demystify what we do and why we do it.
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The Art of Charm is where self-motivated people, just like you, come to learn from the company’s coaches about to how to master human dynamics, relationships, and becoming your best self with the help of Johnny and AJ, the company’s founders. Johnny and AJ bring their 11 years of coaching experience from their famous Bootcamps, where they host clients in Los Angeles from all over the world and they share their stories, best practices and themselves on this weekly podcast. Not only does The Art of Charm help everyday people, including active members of the military, learn how to become higher performers, better spouses, partners, and coworkers, they dig deep into human behavior, the science behind it, and demystify what we do and why we do it.
3 Low-Value Behaviors That Quietly Kill Your Respect | Social Intelligence Brief
The Art of Charm
10 minutes
1 month ago
3 Low-Value Behaviors That Quietly Kill Your Respect | Social Intelligence Brief
Ever wonder why people don’t take you seriously—even when you’re smart and hardworking? In this episode, AJ and Johnny reveal the three most common low value signals that quietly repel respect: being supplicative (begging for approval), combative (using force or intimidation), and competitive (constantly one-upping). Backed by research from UCLA, Harvard, and game theory, they explain how these blind spots sabotage influence and connection—and how to flip them into high value behaviors that attract trust, respect, and opportunity.
You’ll learn why excessive apologizing, fake “alpha” dominance, and relentless bragging send the wrong message, and how small shifts—like standing tall, reframing with “we” language, and spotlighting others—instantly change how people respond to you. If you’ve ever felt overlooked, underestimated, or like your hard work isn’t respected, this episode shows you how to break free from low value patterns and project real confidence.
What to Listen For
[00:00:00] Why people don’t take you seriously: the hidden impact of low value signals
[00:01:02] Supplicative behaviors—apologizing, shrinking, and begging for approval
[00:02:36] The “nice guy” conundrum: why being accommodating makes you forgettable
[00:03:25] Combative behaviors—dominance, intimidation, and fake alpha posturing
[00:03:48] Why real strength is presence, not shouting
[00:04:14] Competitive behaviors—one-upping, bragging, and name-dropping
[00:05:31] Why constant competition makes you high-maintenance
[00:06:03] High achievers’ blind spot: mistaking resumes for personality
[00:06:24] Client story: Jim’s sales calls flipped once he stopped proving himself
[00:07:21] The three low value signals summed up—and the high value alternative
[00:07:46] Weekly challenge: audit your signals and flip them into high value behaviors
[00:08:11] Take the free Influence Index quiz to discover your influence score
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Take this 60-second quiz to find out how your influence stacks up against top performers at theartofcharm.com/influence.
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The Art of Charm
The Art of Charm is where self-motivated people, just like you, come to learn from the company’s coaches about to how to master human dynamics, relationships, and becoming your best self with the help of Johnny and AJ, the company’s founders. Johnny and AJ bring their 11 years of coaching experience from their famous Bootcamps, where they host clients in Los Angeles from all over the world and they share their stories, best practices and themselves on this weekly podcast. Not only does The Art of Charm help everyday people, including active members of the military, learn how to become higher performers, better spouses, partners, and coworkers, they dig deep into human behavior, the science behind it, and demystify what we do and why we do it.
