Unfiltered wisdom on life and growing your relationship with God and your significant other. We're a married couple with over 16 years of experience, sharing our stories of overcoming hard things, including cheating, death of family members, parenting, business and more to grow closer together and closer to God everyday. Discover practical tips for building a strong spiritual foundation, better communication, and building a loving, lasting relationship, all while depending on and giving glory to Jesus for the strength and guidance along the way. We hope you enjoy and we'll see you in the comments!
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Unfiltered wisdom on life and growing your relationship with God and your significant other. We're a married couple with over 16 years of experience, sharing our stories of overcoming hard things, including cheating, death of family members, parenting, business and more to grow closer together and closer to God everyday. Discover practical tips for building a strong spiritual foundation, better communication, and building a loving, lasting relationship, all while depending on and giving glory to Jesus for the strength and guidance along the way. We hope you enjoy and we'll see you in the comments!
The Stigma of Staying After Cheating: Why They Judge You
The ANTD Podcast
20 minutes
3 weeks ago
The Stigma of Staying After Cheating: Why They Judge You
In this powerful episode of The ANTD Podcast, Amee & D. Widders tackle the agonizing question of infidelity recovery and the stigma of staying after cheating. Everyone loves a redemption story... until you tell them your partner cheated, and you’re fighting for your marriage. We dive deep into the "silent stigma" where the outrage, support, and loyalty from friends "dries up" the moment you choose reconciliation. We unpack why people assume staying means you are "desperate, weak, [or] have no self-worth," and how to navigate this intense external pressure. Did you know a 2023 poll found that 62% of people believe relationships should end immediately after cheating? Tune in as we expose the judgment and the gossip that follows a betrayed partner who decides to work through it instead of walking away.
The conversation gets personal as we debate the central question: Should you tell your family and friends you were cheated on? We discuss the reality that external people often "come and go," but your marriage is for the long term. Ultimately, we share why your decision should be "made up... with God" first, and then you can choose to tell—or not tell—everybody else. If you are working through marriage after an affair or dealing with the emotional labor of reconciliation stigma, this episode offers the clarity and conviction you need to prioritize your relationship. Don't forget to like, subscribe, and hit the notification bell for more real-talk on navigating the hardest parts of life and love!
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00:00 The Stigma of Staying After Cheating: Should You Tell Anyone?
00:26 Point One: The Silent Stigma
00:49 Losing Support: Why Friends Distance Themselves After You Reconcile
01:33 "You Chose Him Over Us": The Family Conflict After Infidelity
02:38 Why We Kept the Cheating a Secret from Our Parents
04:25 How 50 Years of Marriage Saved Our Relationship
05:27 Why 50% of Couples Stay: Exposing the Truth About Reconciliation
07:02 Point Two: Their Pain, Your Pressure
07:52 How to Spot Bad Advice Rooted in Unresolved Trauma
09:44 Should Unhealed People Get a Say in Your Marriage?
11:15 Support Break: 1-on-1 Coaching & Biblical Counsel
11:46 Point Three: The Cost of Restoration
12:38 Is a "Relationship Purge" Necessary for Healing?
13:27 The Friend I Thought I Lost (The Story of Jean)
17:12 The 4-Part Order to Prioritize Your Spouse and Rebuild Trust
18:12 The Golden Rule: Make Up Your Mind with God First (Then Tell People)
19:42 Final Word: Your Marriage is for 100 Years, Friends Come and Go
20:42 Outro & Resources for Healing
The ANTD Podcast
Unfiltered wisdom on life and growing your relationship with God and your significant other. We're a married couple with over 16 years of experience, sharing our stories of overcoming hard things, including cheating, death of family members, parenting, business and more to grow closer together and closer to God everyday. Discover practical tips for building a strong spiritual foundation, better communication, and building a loving, lasting relationship, all while depending on and giving glory to Jesus for the strength and guidance along the way. We hope you enjoy and we'll see you in the comments!
