Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

Okay we finally figured out what Christmas is all about, and it really is just the presents. This whole time we thought Santa was a fat white guy in the North Pole who enslaved a different race of sub-human. In reality he was a guy from Turkey who had a heart of gold and wanted to spread some fucking joy to little girls and boys. 

#AHPodcast #History #Santa

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Christmas Is About Santa! | The Almost History Podcast | Ep. 16

Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

No lie, John Brown may be the most woke person of all time, he literally tried to single-handedly end slavery. Born in 1800 in Connecticut (the best state), John was taught from a young age that slavery was a sin against man, and he made it his mission to eradicate it by force. This guy went around trying to recruit people to join his cause and eventually decided to steal guns from the U.S. Government...Like we said, this guy might be the most woke person ever, either way he was a wild boy! 

Thanks to our hilarious guest Jeff Zenisek. Make sure to check out his podcast Too Woke Boys, as well as his IG: @jeffzenisek

Skip to 14:58 to jump straight to the topic

#AHPodcast #History #JohnBrown

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John Brown Was Super Woke | The Almost History Podcast | Ep. 15

Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

Felipe Espinoza may be the reason they called it The Wild West, this guy was a true menace to society. While the rest of the country was going through the Civil War, Felipe and his brother spent their time trying to rack up 600 kills in the Colorado mountains. Once his brother wasn’t an option, Felipe recruited his nephew to carry on the fucked up family tradition. Some say it was revenge for the Mexican-American war, others say it was because he had a vision from The Lord...either way we can all agree this dude and his family were loco. 

Skip to 18:32 to jump straight to the topic

#AHPodcast #History #FelipeEspinoza

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The Butcher Of Uganda | The Almost History Podcast | Ep. 12

Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

Griselda Blanco was a crazy bitch. That’s the only way we can start this off. Born into extreme poverty and violence during Colombia’s La Violencia Civil War, Griselda crawled her way up to become the most successful female drug dealer of all time, also one of the bloodiest. When she was 11 she killed a neighbor boy after she couldn’t ransom him off. She’s credited with inviting the Sicario drive-by and it’s rumored she taught Pablo Escobar how to trap. Like we said, this bitch is crazy!

Skip to 11:25 to jump straight to the topic

#AHPodcast #History #GriseldaBlanco

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Griselda Blanco: The Queen Of The Trap | The Almost History Podcast | Ep. 13

Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

Out of everyone we've discussed so far Idi Amin might have the coolest nickname, The Butcher of Uganda, and he earned every bit of it. We literally just spent the episode talking about him and it's still not clear how he was able to rise from his humble beginnings to being the ruler of Uganda. Known for his physical attributes and lack of thought, Idi was a crazy combination we may never see again. Also he used to eat people, he's a cannibal savage...but also kind of a good dad so not all bad. This is a wild one!

Also check out Jake Rush's comedy special: Overwhelmingly Neutral

And check out Liquid Zoo in Austin Texas!

Skip to 15:45 to jump straight to the topic

#AHPodcast #History #IdiAmin

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The Butcher Of Uganda | The Almost History Podcast | Ep. 12

Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

They say revenge is a dish best served cold. According to Nat Turner it was best served as a rebellion to end slavery. This man was fucking insane, in a good way. Born into slavery, Nat Turner started having hallucinations as a kid, which he took as signs from Heaven that he was a prophet and used it to kickstart one of the craziest rebellions in American history. When people talk about freedom fighters, Nat Turner should be at the top of the list. A true badass.

Skip to 16:10 to jump straight to the topic

#AHPodcast #History #NatTurner

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A Call From Heaven To Whoop Some Ass | The Almost History Podcast | Ep. 11

Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

This episode is extra spooky for Halloween! They say when you aim for the head you better not miss, well today’s topic liked to aim for the ass. If you’ve never heard of Vlad The Impaler then prepare yourself for a warrior with a serious ass fetish. Vlad spent 20+ years fighting throughout Romania and Hungary, impaling thousands along the way. By the time he was done over 20,000 fell to his tactics. He was also literally the inspiration behind Dracula. This may be our wildest one so far!

Skip to 17:27 to jump straight to the topic

#AHPodcast #History #VladTheImpaler #Dracula

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Vlad The Impaler: AKA The Birth of Dracula | The Almost History Podcast | Ep. 10

https://youtu.be/hEj0SXlJMTU

Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

This episode is about America’s first black Heavyweight Champion Jack Johnson. Jack was known as the Gavelston Giant and he lived up to the name. He was 5 inches bigger than the average man of his time and loved opening up cans of whoop ass on whoever was down for a scrap. He literally fought racism with his bare hands on his way to becoming the Champ. Also he loved white women so much the Federal Government had to get involved. This is a wild one!

Skip to 11:32  to jump straight to the topic

#AHPodcast #History #JackJohnson 

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Fists Up For Jack Johnson: America's First Black Heavyweight | The Almost History Podcast | Ep. 9

Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

This episode is about America’s greatest warrior and we don’t mean Alex Jones. Born into extreme poverty, no parents by the time he’s 16 and barely weighing more than 100 pounds, Audie Murphy had enough drive and power to make The Rock jealous. You know how people say, “when I get mad I just see red”, for Audie that was legit. This Short King was truly insane.

Skip to 15:29 to jump straight to the topic.

#AHPodcast #History #AudieMurphy

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Peter Freuchen Was The Ultimate Chad | The Almost History Podcast | Ep. 8

Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

Who do you think is the most interesting man ever? Shut up, you’re wrong. Now you look dumb. The correct answer is Peter Fruechen. This dude was insane. Went to school to be a doctor and then dropped out to conquer the Arctic. This guy killed a Polar Bear and then turned it into a coat. What more proof do you need? He was a 6'7 madman who would tell Nazi's he was Jewish so they would try and fight him. And don't forget about the Poop Knife. It doesn't get much more wild than this. Shoutout Peter. His kid's names: Avataq Igimaqssusuktoranguapaluk & Pipaluk Jette Tukuminguaq Kasaluk Palika

Skip to 16:45 to jump straight to the topic. 

#AHPodcast #History #PeterFreuchen

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Peter Freuchen Was The Ultimate Chad | The Almost History Podcast | Ep. 7

Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

Today's episode is all about the Havana Syndrome, a vertigo-like disease, that oddly only affected U.S Diplomats. Back in 2016 some Americanos were hanging out in Havana and got hit by the Dizzy Gun. All of a sudden they couldn’t stand or walk. Then the same thing started happening in other countries and eventually even in America. If you listen to this episode, we might’ve been hit with this shit too.

#AHPodcast #History #HavanaSyndome

Research:

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Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

The 70's were a crazy time. Drugs, cults, and vaginas with bushes...things were wild. Nothing was crazier than the group of more than 900 who left America and went down to a little plot of land in Guyana to kill themselves. 

Today's episode is all about the Jonestown Massacre led by Jim Jones, a preacher. Instead of moving the word of Jesus he was preaching about communism and racial equality...so not all bad in hindsight. This is a wild one. 

#AHPodcast #History #Jonestown

Research:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ro-Q3EdDiIO5ndNH1gxH8rqMEEYuTOjs55DhqRfok5U/edit?usp=sharing

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Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

We're not saying Rambo was inspired by this guy, but Rambo was also released after Mad Jack. Grab your bag pipes and your arrows, sit down and learn about this absolute psychopath on the battlefield.

Today’s episode is about Mad Jack, the man who ran into battle with a bow and arrow, bag pipes and a kilt. During the Nazi invasion in World War 2 there was one distinct soldier who's name was whispered in hush tones. Here is the story of Mad Jack.

#AHPodcast #History #WorldWar2

Research: 

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1RAKTjqQSf2LJQ_ngb914FAjNSsco0KGFD9iPD0NDtCw/edit?usp=sharing

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Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

Who’s the greatest pirate of all time? Blackbeard? Morgan? Long John Silver?...Interesting you didn't say any women. Sexist.

Today’s episode is about the greatest pirate the world has ever known and it’s not a man. Yea. How do you like that you misogynist neck beards. The world’s greatest pirate was a woman and the best pizza is in Connecticut. These are just the facts of life. Check out today's episode and learn some cool shit. 

Research: 

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1RAKTjqQSf2LJQ_ngb914FAjNSsco0KGFD9iPD0NDtCw/edit?usp=sharing

#AHPodcast #History #Pirates

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Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

Episode 2 is packed with explosive content!..If this thing becomes profitable we're gonna hire a copywriter cause it's only the 2nd episode but we suck at this. Anyways, back in the 90's a crazy guy named Tim blew up a Federal Building in OKC, killing over 100 people and causing a ruckus. Or was it actually some crazy government conspiracy that led to the death of a cop. Tune in and decide for yourself. 

#AHPodcast #History #OklahomaCityBombing 

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Welcome to Almost History. A podcast by 2 struggling comedians in LA, Logan Quiroz & Ben Gordon, where we discuss history, conspiracies and everything in between.

You ever heard of The Battle of the Sexes? No? What’re you, stupid? You think women suck at sports? Check this shit out. Back in the 70’s Billie Jean King played against Bobby Riggs in a tennis match and whooped his monkey ass to complete one of the greatest sports achievements for women…Or was it all BS? Check out today’s episode and decide for yourself.

#AHPodcast #History #BattleOfTheSexes

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