Childhood. In the final – and sweatiest – episode of Lockdown Season (well, you know, the first Lockdown Season...) our hosts travail relentlessly on their quest to unearth the foulest of jakes. Notwithstanding UK "government" "advice", Will and Alex continue their roles as public servants to explain how to control the virus in cramped, cold and old prison cells, airing cupboards, and wipe-clean kitchen floors.

Should space even be a frontier at all? Is dressing up in a fox fur scarf and nothing else conducive to a modern-day superhero outfit? Do you remember getting bathed in a sink? These are questions on nobody's lips; our hosts' answers are the exact knowledge you need to keep you safe in the most ill-approached situation in worldwide living history.

Join them in the cold bath once every two hours, or perish in 47ºC heat along with the weak and infirm, and they will guide you to reach a stalwart of stools, a prime potty, a tip top thunderbox and to flush all your blues away.

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