When you're searching for a surrogate, it’s easy to focus on personality, values, or past experience—but there’s one key factor many intended parents overlook: BMI.
In this episode, Dr. Alyssa Small Layne shares what BMI really means for surrogacy, why fertility clinics and agencies have strict BMI cutoffs, and how to approach the topic with compassion and clarity. This is the conversation Alyssa wishes she could have with every intended parent before they fall in love with a surrogate match that doesn’t meet medical screening.
🎧 If you’re unsure what “too high” or “too low” really means—or what the risks are to your surrogate, baby, and budget—this episode is your roadmap.
What You’ll Learn:
01:44 — The BMI red flag in a forum post that sparked this conversation
02:23 — Why a surrogate’s OB clearance doesn’t mean clinic approval
03:44 — The medical risks of high BMI for surrogate and baby
06:52 — How high BMI affects embryo transfer success and miscarriage risk
08:27 — Real-world costs of BMI-related complications
09:32 — What are the actual BMI cutoffs (and who sets them)?
11:14 — The “double standard” debate: IVF for self vs. IVF for surrogacy
13:20 — Why BMI is more than a number—and when to make exceptions
17:09 — OB clearance vs. final clinic approval
18:05 — Why independent surrogacy doesn’t mean cutting corners
21:40 — How to talk about BMI respectfully with your surrogate
23:26 — Ethical concerns when agencies push surrogates outside guidelines
25:26 — 5 steps to protect your journey and future baby
Resources Mentioned:
ASRM guidelines: Recommendations for practices using gestational carriers: A committee opinion
BloomBridge Surrogacy App: https://gojunie.com/solutions/bloombridge
Case management
“It's not about judgment—it’s about lowering risks and giving your baby the healthiest start possible.”
