On this episode: Lucy Lopez, Elizabeth Newcamp, and Zak Rosen have a tough listener question about what to do when a relative is an alcoholic and don’t think the environment is safe for the relative’s kid. To answer this question, they’re joined by Lisa Smith from Parallel Recovery. They unpack how to set real boundaries with family members without shaming them; acceptable ultimatums; how to “pre-game” for tough situations; and more.  But first, they share their latest triumphs and fails. We’ve got two triumphs and a tribulation this episode. Lucy is triumphing over breakfast and Zac and his lovely wife had a Halloween-themed getaway. But Elizabeth is stressing over a big solo trip with the kids.  Join us on Facebook and email us at careandfeedingpod@slate.com to ask us new questions, tell us what you thought of today’s show, and give us ideas about what we should talk about in future episodes. You can also call our phone line: (646) 357-9318. If you enjoy this show, please consider signing up for Slate Plus. Slate Plus members get to hang out with us on the Plus Playground every week for a whole additional grab-bag of content — and you’ll get an ad-free experience across the network. And you’ll also be supporting the work we do here on Care and Feeding. Sign up now at slate.com/careplus – or try it out on Apple Podcasts. production Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices