Years ago I learned a simple tool that has improved all my relationships. This tool is about looking for the cues that others are giving us - and using those times to connect. They are called Bids For Connection, a Gottman term. I will outline what bids are, ways to respond, and how to simplify the process.
Before we jump in, remember to stay connected through the Simple Saturdays email,
you can sign up here.
Key points and related links
* What bids for connection are
*
Our marriage was struggling, here are 12 things that helped us heal and strengthen it
*
When They Tell Me I’m Lucky to Have Him
*
Why it’s worth paying attention to love languages and expectations in marriage
* Noticing different types of bids for connection in your partner, kids and friends
* Gottman's list of
type of bids
* Three responses to bids for connection (turning towards, away, against)
* Gottman research on bids and relationship success
* Applying bids for connection to parenting
* Recognizing your own bids for connection, and unmet needs
* Benefits of responding to bids for connection with empathy
*
85. When empathy is hard in marriage and friendships
*
84. How parenting with empathy can transform your relationship
*
207. Our judgements and assumptions of others (fundamental attribution bias and how it impacts our relationships)
* Starting simple by noticing and responding to bids for connection
* Using bids to connect through presence, not just problem-solving
*
16. When did I stop enjoying my kids? Knowing your vision and values. The best waffles ever.
*
203. Being a mom who enjoys her life
Full transcript (unedited)
0:00
Hey friends, it's Shawna, your nerdy girlfriend and counselor from simpler purpose.ca. Welcome to this and on purpose podcast or right away. Announcement, I mentioned probably in the emails, at least maybe on the podcast, I can't remember that I will be wrapping up the podcast for the summer. And at this point, what I am deciding to do is actually retire the podcast, at least for the time being,
