I currently feel like an arthritic porn star who made a name for herself deep-throating cheese graters. In other words, I’m in pain—and I think it’s probably a good time to talk about my experience while I’m in this state.

Because, honestly, most days lately, I’m walking around in a kind of bliss. My day-to-day life feels indistinguishable from what some might call Heaven.

And I genuinely believe that the idea of Heaven can only be this reality. Not something elsewhere, but right here. And to the extent that we open our eyes—and our hearts—to that possibility, we begin to live it. We live as it.

And yet, here I am—simultaneously having this very real experience of flu symptoms and body aches. Sensations that are unmistakably horrible.

So how can I justify saying this is still perfection? How can I continue to feel like there's really nothing wrong?

The truth is... I’m not sure I fully can.