It’s challenging to reestablish routines after a stroke, and I find it to be so once again after moving into a new house. Every habit that came naturally now takes extra thought and energy, from feeding the dogs to remembering where things are in the house. It’s a humbling reminder that lifelong recovery requires patience and self-compassion. The mental fatigue that comes from having to think through every tiny step can easily spiral into anxiety or self-criticism, so I’m back to napping every afternoon. Napping is part of my emotional self-care and an act of acceptance. When I slow down, I can see the noise in my mind and choose to quiet it down.
Lately, I’ve been working through Step 4 again, making a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself. Most of my complicated emotions come down to simple human needs of being hungry, angry, lonely, or tired (H.A.L.T.). In the moment, it can feel discrediting to the heaviness of my feelings to simplify the solution like that. But, once again, when I pause, I can get honest with myself and take real action on the inside instead of lashing out or taking ineffective action toward others on the outside.
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To learn more about vestibular disorders visit https://vestibular.org
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