The phrase "I'm not ready yet" is a common refrain in elder care, as Steve Gurney, founder of the Positive Aging Community, shared in a 2025 webinar. Heard daily for 35 years, it reflects hesitation to plan for aging, from housing to legal prep. A community-driven discussion, sparked by surveys and a concise PowerPoint, unpacked this sentiment's roots, risks, and solutions.What It MeansGurney’s slides listed key triggers: aversion to age-segregated living, affordability fears, emotional downsizing burdens, resistance to strangers in the home, and denial of health decline. Participants added depth via chat: Pam said, “We don’t see ourselves as old. I’m frozen at age 53.” Dixie noted, “Folks aren’t ready to face mortality.” These reflect self-perception and fear, often tied to ageism—prejudice against one’s future self.Why We HesitateEmotional attachment to homes, financial uncertainty, and independence fears drive delays. Gurney highlighted longevity concerns: with people living past 90, costs loom large. Health denial—“I’m fine now”—blocks planning for scenarios like dementia. Attendees like Wally feared becoming a burden, while Joe said it’s easier to imagine death than incapacitation.Risks of DelayProcrastination limits options, as Gurney’s slide warned. Health crises or emergencies force rushed choices, reducing control. Early planning ensures choice in living arrangements and access to benefits like social programs or peace of mind. Phyllis shared her mother’s 19-year dementia journey, showing aging in place is possible but tough without prep.Helping OthersTo counter “I’m not ready yet,” Gurney advised empathy: “I get it—I don’t want to leave my home either.” Encourage open talks about fears, share stories of regretful delays, and suggest gradual steps like adult daycare “test drives.” Legal prep—wills, trusts, advance directives, HIPAA forms—was urged by attendees like Florence.Moving Forward“I’m not ready yet” is human but surmountable. The webinar’s breakout rooms fostered candid chats, reinforcing community as key. Planning now—whether for housing, care, or documents—offers control and dignity. As Gurney’s platform, positiveaging.com, provides resources, the message is clear: readiness shapes a purposeful future.
