Many of us have gone for various training and learned techniques designed to move the client forward. However if the focus of the therapy gets wrapped up in perfecting the technique, then we can often get stuck in the skill or tool and lose sight of the person in front of us. In this podcast we offer that the therapist should try to address the client from a position of caring and empathy. We should recognize that skills and tools will best serve the therapeutic process when they are generated from a heart-centered place. In addition, a heart-centered approach means that the therapist is better able to maintain a position of neutrality in order to enter client system. By maintaining a position of neutrality it allows the clinician to enter into the family or individual ‘system’ in a manner that allows him to be a catalyst for change.

In the video, in the middle of the couple quarreling, Dr. Kaplan asks “How am I doing?!” With everyone’s agreement that their quarreling has not changed, Dr. K scolds the couple. But he does so from a heart-centered place that is caring and neutral.