The boundaries that start as necessary self-protection but end up turning into walls that shut out the relationships you're trying to preserve.
As overachievers, we often run without boundaries for years - saying yes, taking on more, fixing and helping everyone else at our expense. Then we discover boundaries and they feel life-changing. But sometimes in protecting ourselves after years of over-giving, our boundaries get rigid and isolating.
Dasha challenges the popular advice of "write down behaviors you won't tolerate, inform others, and if they cross them, walk away." While boundaries are essential, this approach can damage the relationships you're trying to improve.
The key insight: Boundaries aren't just about enforcement - they're about agreement.
She shares a common relationship scenario where one partner needs space after conflict while the other wants to talk immediately. Instead of rigid boundary enforcement, she suggests creating relational agreements ahead of time that honor both people's needs.
Key topics:
Questions to consider: Where have your boundaries become walls? How can you protect your energy without isolating yourself?
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