(July 3, 2022) Jess third wheels, Puff has to whisper about Matthew Tkachuk, and Iris drops the worst joke on the pod to date. Buckle up y'all, this is a good one. Off the ice Alexander Ovechkin is a soccer star now. He’s a nightmare for goalies in every sport - that one timer is just as lethal on the soccer field.  TSN hockey Nathalie Spooner pregnancy announcement Capitals promote Emily Engel-Natzke to NHL video coordinator. First fulltime female coach in franchise history.  Goalie mask innovation!  Social media Luke Prokop and Brock McGinn Twitter shenanigans  Tuukka Rask will return. Using everything he borrowed from his former teammates. But he has some questions about the All Star vote he got. He’s definitely keeping himself entertained now that he’s retired.  Mika Zibanejad is not impressed that he wasn’t nominated for best bromance.  Braden Holtby back in DC for the Pride parade. No sighting of tortoises, sadly.  Former Flyers winning things and causing absolute chaos. NAK and Alex Lyon (who got suspended two games for this, one for each middle finger?) Brock Boeser contract extension post on Insta. Why’d he have to bring poor Cal Peterson into it? Weird stats Darcy Kuemper, first ever goalie to assist on an OT winner in the SCF.  Cale Makar first unanimous winner of the Conn Smythe.  NHL awards Moritz Seider and his dapper bowtie take home the Calder. And Dylan Larkin was there. Those mean tweets from 2019 didn’t age well, huh.  Igor Shesterkin wins the Vezina and is precious. Want a headband like his? Amazon, apparently.  Cale Makar is awkward - but he won the Norris and now Devon Toews owes him an iPad. With lots of gigs apparently.  Auston Matthews went casual and… yes.  The Avs Stanley Cup win shenanigans Nazem Kadri says kiss my ass.  Nicolas Aube-Kubel dented the damn cup. Within 6 minutes? That’s a record. Tag yourself which expression is the most you… (Did we already cover this? Under former flyers social media?) The Hat Saga continues: Peter Baugh’s hat touched it first Avs defeat all the evil exes Put that on fucking Twitter. The start of the Bo “white girl wasted” Byram saga  Mostly naked Val Nichushkin.  Landeskog showed up naked to Erik Johnson’s bedroom the morning after. With the cup. And then EJ took the morning after Cup pic.  Gabe Landeskog has a future in chicken.  Stanley Cup took a wrong turn, ended up with Landeskog’s neighbors.  What do we even say about Erik Johnson Stanley Cup Parade shenanigans Naz Too Many Men shirts - Adrienne Ruth (guffychan) Bo Byram is a player - someone tell the cops. White girl wasted Bo Byram, the sequel. There’s a video too.  Which kind of drunk are you, Avs edition? Pavel Francouz’s daughter is the only smart one: naps are awesome   Credits Hosts: Jess, Iris, and Puff Producers: Mac and Steph Engineer: Mac Music: "Retro" - Wayne Jones