(May 8, 2022) Three friends have some hilarious shit to say about pretty much all things narratively juicy in the NHL. One friend/producer/engineer's life is lowkey falling apart, hence the tardiness. We've got plenty of queer quips and irreverent takes on hockey in the hopper. Come get y'all some. Link in the Notes On the ice Please bring the puck with you on a penalty shot. What is it with these Bruins? Shades of Marchand losing it.  Jersey off our backs gets horny. Go Lomberg For Mac: Chara goes off.  No one told Micah Parsons how to drop the puck.  Matthew Tkachuk is clutch and scores to tie it with ZERO POINT ONE SECOND LEFT.  Mac & Iris’ anthem corner: Malcolm Subban edition.  EBUG: Thomas Hodges Double OT legend Louis Domingue. The spicy pork saga - now being sold at the arena. https://twitter.com/nhlhistorygirl/status/695646039609462786  Cale Makar left ankles on the ice. Again.  Off the ice Nana-nana-nana-nana… Bettman? Biden, dude, what’chu doing? Flyers rookies warm my cold dead heart.  Drake is all about his goals. Like Ovechkin.  Our proposal to get rid of the canon in Columbus. It’s for Jess, Johnny Hockey, and scared broadcasters everywhere.  Brady Tkachuk, bartending shirtless. I do not have words. Captain shit.  Kodak returns to a Panthers game.  Something about these playoffs makes for some interesting answers in press conferences Watch a Leafs game with Steve Dangle. Now with heart rate monitor. it’s ‘cause he doesn’t trust the leafs to hold a lead. if they go up 3-1 poor steve Canes legend Pyotr Kochetkov has a very capable translator in… Andrei Svechnikov? Edmonton puts up signs of 29 and 97. Our local reporter Puff investigates. Social media Remember when everyone rooted for the Sharks?  Let Mike Smith score. The Oilers have the graphic ready - he’s been so close! Tony X just wants to see the goals. Iris can relate Scoring goals sells jerseys. 60 for Matthews, also #1 in jerseys sold.  Girl at Raptors game slowly realizes she’s sitting next to Auston Matthews, the face journey Fashion icon Matthew Tkachuk Taylor Lewan has trouble understanding the score. twitter can be confusing!!!  Trash talk 101 with Landeskog and Makar. cale makar music video,  best chirper? most creative chirps Nanny Marner in the house.  Seth Jarvis, fake ID for a puck.  Weird stats Ilya Lyubushkin is a goal scorer now. Career high of TWO goals.  Lomberg and instigating in the final five minutes. That’s a thing only he’s gotten suspended for. BF “he did *what* now!? Joel Farabee vs Keith Yandle +/-   Credits Music: "We Made It" - Reed Mathis Hosted by Iris, Jess, and Puff. Produced by Mac and Steph. Engineered by Mac.