Can you believe that experiencing complete chaos during major life changes is actually a predictable and normal part of transition?

On this inaugural episode of Neither Here Nor There, host Ruthie Gomez and guest Laura discuss the transition cycle and how understanding its predictable patterns can help anyone navigate times of change with more peace and preparation. They break down the four stages of transition - settled, leaving, chaos, entering, and re-engagement - explaining how each phase brings distinct emotional and practical challenges that affect individuals and families moving through major life changes.

They explore how expectations play a crucial role in determining our emotional response to transition, using the analogy that disappointment serves as an alarm alerting us to unmet expectations. They share personal stories from their international moves, including hilarious package delivery mishaps that illustrate how reality often differs dramatically from our assumptions. They explain how the gap between expectations and reality creates emotional "snap" moments, and offer practical tools for realigning expectations to reduce disappointment during times of change. "Something about hearing you explain this cycle of leaving, chaos, entering, settling, makes me feel like so many of the things that I experience in a life of moving and transition are normal," Laura explains. "I think that's when I've done transition seminars, that's one of the things people come out saying is, I feel normal."

The conversation addresses why depression and anxiety commonly appear during the entering stage rather than the leaving stage, as people actually live the reality of loss rather than just anticipating it. Laura and Ruthie emphasize that no one is the best version of themselves during transition, encouraging grace for both ourselves and our loved ones as we navigate the vulnerability and adjustment periods that come with major life changes.