Pickle Race Scandal Sours Annual Vernon County Tradition
By Staff Reporter Gary Richrath
Esophia, Wis.—What was supposed to be a celebration of brine, community, and good-natured competition turned sour this weekend after allegations of foul play shook the village’s beloved Annual Pickle Races.
Organizers say 39-year-old Zona Elder, a longtime competitor and self-described “pickle purist,” was caught with an electronic motor embedded in her racing cucumber. The contraption was allegedly discovered after Elder’s pickle surged ahead at speeds described by witnesses as “unpickled” and “downright NASCAR.”
“It zipped down the creek like a green torpedo,” said fellow competitor Marvin Kline, who has raced since 1987. “I’ve never seen anything like it. We were furious. You just don’t motorize a pickle.”
Rules for the race—now in its 43rd year—strictly prohibit foreign substances, weights, or propulsion devices. Traditionalists pride themselves on the “float-and-hope” method, where cucumbers are released into Bad Axe Creek and carried downstream by the current.
Elder has denied intentional wrongdoing, insisting the motor “accidentally fell” into her pickle during the pickling process. Officials remain unconvinced. “This wasn’t an accident,” said race marshal Darla Swenson. “This was pickle doping.”
Wisconsin Governor Tony Evers was unavailable for comment, reportedly out of town sourcing “emergency barrels” to restore the event’s reputation. Meanwhile, participants have called for lifetime bans and stricter inspections, including possible X-rays of future entries.
Despite the uproar, organizers insist the race will continue next year. “The world looks to Vernon County for integrity in pickle racing,” said Swenson. “We cannot let one bad cucumber spoil the whole barrel.”
