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Modern Couples
Rick Miller, LICSW & Lilian Borges, LPC
19 episodes
2 days ago
Modern Couples: What Your Therapist Never Told You Have you ever had questions about relationships? Do you wonder what therapists might know—that you don’t? Then join us! Whether you’re in the car, at the gym, or on a break at work, this is an opportunity to have all your couples’ questions answered by therapists who bring decades of experience to the podcast. Couples therapists Rick Miller, LICSW, and Lilian Borges, LPC, take on relationships’ trickier moments with experience and humor, in a mere 20 minutes presenting a case study and the theory behind it, then sharing their personal takes on the issue and providing some ideas for dealing with it. Richard C. Miller, LICSW, is a psychotherapist, public speaker, and author who has taught at The Harvard Couples Conference, the Milton Erickson Foundation Couples Conference, and on the faculty of well-known couples experts Esther Perel, Terry Real, and Stan Takin. He has been interviewed by the NY Times and writes for the Psychotherapy Networker and Psychology Today. He is a TEDx speaker, and founder and executive director of a nonprofit agency, Gay Sons And Mothers. Lilian Borges, LPC, is an experienced therapist, teacher, presenter, and podcaster who has been treating individuals and couples for more than thirty years. One of very few certified PACT (psychobiological approach to couples’ therapy) therapists in the US, she is additionally an expert in Ericksonian hypnosis. She currently has a private practice in Arizona where her own multinational background facilitates her work with a diverse clientèle. From whether or not it’s okay to share your bed with pets, how to deal with money, keeping secrets from your partner, or deciding where to live, Rick and Lilian have suggestions for making your life richer and bringing your relationships closer. It all starts here!
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Relationships
Society & Culture
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All content for Modern Couples is the property of Rick Miller, LICSW & Lilian Borges, LPC and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
Modern Couples: What Your Therapist Never Told You Have you ever had questions about relationships? Do you wonder what therapists might know—that you don’t? Then join us! Whether you’re in the car, at the gym, or on a break at work, this is an opportunity to have all your couples’ questions answered by therapists who bring decades of experience to the podcast. Couples therapists Rick Miller, LICSW, and Lilian Borges, LPC, take on relationships’ trickier moments with experience and humor, in a mere 20 minutes presenting a case study and the theory behind it, then sharing their personal takes on the issue and providing some ideas for dealing with it. Richard C. Miller, LICSW, is a psychotherapist, public speaker, and author who has taught at The Harvard Couples Conference, the Milton Erickson Foundation Couples Conference, and on the faculty of well-known couples experts Esther Perel, Terry Real, and Stan Takin. He has been interviewed by the NY Times and writes for the Psychotherapy Networker and Psychology Today. He is a TEDx speaker, and founder and executive director of a nonprofit agency, Gay Sons And Mothers. Lilian Borges, LPC, is an experienced therapist, teacher, presenter, and podcaster who has been treating individuals and couples for more than thirty years. One of very few certified PACT (psychobiological approach to couples’ therapy) therapists in the US, she is additionally an expert in Ericksonian hypnosis. She currently has a private practice in Arizona where her own multinational background facilitates her work with a diverse clientèle. From whether or not it’s okay to share your bed with pets, how to deal with money, keeping secrets from your partner, or deciding where to live, Rick and Lilian have suggestions for making your life richer and bringing your relationships closer. It all starts here!
Show more...
Relationships
Society & Culture
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Do You Feel Like Roommates in a Sexless Marriage?
Modern Couples
38 minutes 17 seconds
4 months ago
Do You Feel Like Roommates in a Sexless Marriage?

Marriages work (or don’t work) in a number of different ways. Some couples enjoy frequent sex; others have less sexual activity, or none at all. Whatever they choose is right for them, as long as both partners are in agreement about the level of intimacy they give and receive.


Problems arise when one partner wants more (or less) sexual intimacy than does the other. This can often manifest in thefeeling of being roommates rather than a couple. The partner who wishes for more intimacy can experience disconnection, rejection, and dissatisfaction, while the partner wanting less may be experiencing shame, discomfort, and pressure.


The key to solving the “roommate” problem is communication. Both partners need to be clear and honest about their needs—and about why those needs are important. A willingness to be vulnerable and not rely on assumptions is critical.

 

Sexual desire can wane for a number of different reasons: aging, childbirth, weight gain, life events, a lack of novelty, and more. Long-term sexual satisfaction often requires both emotional attunement and intentional efforts to keep engaged.

 

Different couples have different ways of viewing sexual intimacy, which can be affected by their ages, genders, agreed upon relationship models, and more. As long as there is open communication and regular self-reflection, then a healthy relationship connection is possible.

Modern Couples
Modern Couples: What Your Therapist Never Told You Have you ever had questions about relationships? Do you wonder what therapists might know—that you don’t? Then join us! Whether you’re in the car, at the gym, or on a break at work, this is an opportunity to have all your couples’ questions answered by therapists who bring decades of experience to the podcast. Couples therapists Rick Miller, LICSW, and Lilian Borges, LPC, take on relationships’ trickier moments with experience and humor, in a mere 20 minutes presenting a case study and the theory behind it, then sharing their personal takes on the issue and providing some ideas for dealing with it. Richard C. Miller, LICSW, is a psychotherapist, public speaker, and author who has taught at The Harvard Couples Conference, the Milton Erickson Foundation Couples Conference, and on the faculty of well-known couples experts Esther Perel, Terry Real, and Stan Takin. He has been interviewed by the NY Times and writes for the Psychotherapy Networker and Psychology Today. He is a TEDx speaker, and founder and executive director of a nonprofit agency, Gay Sons And Mothers. Lilian Borges, LPC, is an experienced therapist, teacher, presenter, and podcaster who has been treating individuals and couples for more than thirty years. One of very few certified PACT (psychobiological approach to couples’ therapy) therapists in the US, she is additionally an expert in Ericksonian hypnosis. She currently has a private practice in Arizona where her own multinational background facilitates her work with a diverse clientèle. From whether or not it’s okay to share your bed with pets, how to deal with money, keeping secrets from your partner, or deciding where to live, Rick and Lilian have suggestions for making your life richer and bringing your relationships closer. It all starts here!