*Note: This episode is about my goal to reduce the tension between those who stay in the Church and those who leave**
My friend Andy Newman (married father of three, Ex-Mormon, therapist, LGBTQ ally, bridge builder) joins for a series of episodes. In this episode, Andy talks about “the shame train” during his youth including:
*Porn, substance use, and working with his church leaders
* Shame around the “addiction label”, restrictions (temple trips), and falsely seeing himself as a “terrible addict”
* How porn/substance use was more about self-medicating from the shame and trauma than a desire to displease God
* How his worth become dependent on church leaders
* All the people who helped him along the way
Andy then talks about his road to be an LGBTQ ally:
* Started in high school in Iowa with proximity to queer people
* Felt he had to choose the Church over queer people
* Powerful post-mission experience giving a blessing to a queer student at BYU-I
* Fully taking on the ally role following the pulse nightclub shooting
* Staying in the church as an ally
* What led him to eventually leave the Church
Andy also talks about why he isn’t trying to get other people to leave the Church—but trying to build bridges of understanding. In the next episode, will talk about his mixed-faith marriage (Andy’s wife is active LDS) and how they have a beautiful/supportive marriage—including Andy attending church.
Thank you, my friend Andy, for being on the podcast and your great heart and clinical skills to help heal others and bring us together as the same human family. You are a good man and friend.
Links:
Psychology today:
www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/andy-newman-gilbert-az/974441
IG: www.instagram.com/andynewmanlpc/
TikTok:
www.tiktok.com/@deconstruction_therapy
All content for Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler is the property of Richard Ostler and is served directly from their servers
with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
*Note: This episode is about my goal to reduce the tension between those who stay in the Church and those who leave**
My friend Andy Newman (married father of three, Ex-Mormon, therapist, LGBTQ ally, bridge builder) joins for a series of episodes. In this episode, Andy talks about “the shame train” during his youth including:
*Porn, substance use, and working with his church leaders
* Shame around the “addiction label”, restrictions (temple trips), and falsely seeing himself as a “terrible addict”
* How porn/substance use was more about self-medicating from the shame and trauma than a desire to displease God
* How his worth become dependent on church leaders
* All the people who helped him along the way
Andy then talks about his road to be an LGBTQ ally:
* Started in high school in Iowa with proximity to queer people
* Felt he had to choose the Church over queer people
* Powerful post-mission experience giving a blessing to a queer student at BYU-I
* Fully taking on the ally role following the pulse nightclub shooting
* Staying in the church as an ally
* What led him to eventually leave the Church
Andy also talks about why he isn’t trying to get other people to leave the Church—but trying to build bridges of understanding. In the next episode, will talk about his mixed-faith marriage (Andy’s wife is active LDS) and how they have a beautiful/supportive marriage—including Andy attending church.
Thank you, my friend Andy, for being on the podcast and your great heart and clinical skills to help heal others and bring us together as the same human family. You are a good man and friend.
Links:
Psychology today:
www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/andy-newman-gilbert-az/974441
IG: www.instagram.com/andynewmanlpc/
TikTok:
www.tiktok.com/@deconstruction_therapy
Episode 844: Autumn McAlpin and Vienna Boyes, Powerful New Documentary: “Sanctuary”
Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler
1 hour 8 minutes 31 seconds
2 weeks ago
Episode 844: Autumn McAlpin and Vienna Boyes, Powerful New Documentary: “Sanctuary”
My friend Autumn McAlpin (co-director and mother of two queer sons) and Vienna Boyes (co-director, mid 20s, queer) join us to share their stories and also their new feature length documentary called “Sanctuary”.
Sanctuary—a must see—is a powerful documentary telling stories at the intersection of being a Latter-day Saint (and other Christian faiths) and being LGBTQ. I watched Sanctuary and was deeply moved hearing powerful stories/projects/efforts of queer people, parents, allies, and local church leaders. I learned so much and was deeply moved.
I encourage everyone to watch Sanctuary (see show notes) and share with others. The film will be going on a screening tour in early 2026 before being released on streamers -- please follow the film's website and Instagram for screening announcements.
Thank you, Autumn, and Vienna—and everyone involved with the documentary. You are making a huge difference in our community!
Links (feel free to add more links such as social media if you want to)
Sanctuary Web Site: https://sanctuarydoc.com/
Sanctuary Instagram: @sanctuarydocfilm
Vienna's Instagram: @indigothestudio
Autumn's Instagram: @autumnmcalpin
Spencer’s Song: https://open.spotify.com/track/2qKXdi4mxZ0rXGoxJ6jlCF
Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler
*Note: This episode is about my goal to reduce the tension between those who stay in the Church and those who leave**
My friend Andy Newman (married father of three, Ex-Mormon, therapist, LGBTQ ally, bridge builder) joins for a series of episodes. In this episode, Andy talks about “the shame train” during his youth including:
*Porn, substance use, and working with his church leaders
* Shame around the “addiction label”, restrictions (temple trips), and falsely seeing himself as a “terrible addict”
* How porn/substance use was more about self-medicating from the shame and trauma than a desire to displease God
* How his worth become dependent on church leaders
* All the people who helped him along the way
Andy then talks about his road to be an LGBTQ ally:
* Started in high school in Iowa with proximity to queer people
* Felt he had to choose the Church over queer people
* Powerful post-mission experience giving a blessing to a queer student at BYU-I
* Fully taking on the ally role following the pulse nightclub shooting
* Staying in the church as an ally
* What led him to eventually leave the Church
Andy also talks about why he isn’t trying to get other people to leave the Church—but trying to build bridges of understanding. In the next episode, will talk about his mixed-faith marriage (Andy’s wife is active LDS) and how they have a beautiful/supportive marriage—including Andy attending church.
Thank you, my friend Andy, for being on the podcast and your great heart and clinical skills to help heal others and bring us together as the same human family. You are a good man and friend.
Links:
Psychology today:
www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/andy-newman-gilbert-az/974441
IG: www.instagram.com/andynewmanlpc/
TikTok:
www.tiktok.com/@deconstruction_therapy
