*Note: This episode is about my goal to reduce the tension between those who stay in the Church and those who leave**
My friend Andy Newman (married father of three, Ex-Mormon, therapist, LGBTQ ally, bridge builder) joins for a series of episodes. In this episode, Andy talks about “the shame train” during his youth including:
*Porn, substance use, and working with his church leaders
* Shame around the “addiction label”, restrictions (temple trips), and falsely seeing himself as a “terrible addict”
* How porn/substance use was more about self-medicating from the shame and trauma than a desire to displease God
* How his worth become dependent on church leaders
* All the people who helped him along the way
Andy then talks about his road to be an LGBTQ ally:
* Started in high school in Iowa with proximity to queer people
* Felt he had to choose the Church over queer people
* Powerful post-mission experience giving a blessing to a queer student at BYU-I
* Fully taking on the ally role following the pulse nightclub shooting
* Staying in the church as an ally
* What led him to eventually leave the Church
Andy also talks about why he isn’t trying to get other people to leave the Church—but trying to build bridges of understanding. In the next episode, will talk about his mixed-faith marriage (Andy’s wife is active LDS) and how they have a beautiful/supportive marriage—including Andy attending church.
Thank you, my friend Andy, for being on the podcast and your great heart and clinical skills to help heal others and bring us together as the same human family. You are a good man and friend.
Links:
Psychology today:
www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/andy-newman-gilbert-az/974441
IG: www.instagram.com/andynewmanlpc/
TikTok:
www.tiktok.com/@deconstruction_therapy
All content for Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler is the property of Richard Ostler and is served directly from their servers
with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
*Note: This episode is about my goal to reduce the tension between those who stay in the Church and those who leave**
My friend Andy Newman (married father of three, Ex-Mormon, therapist, LGBTQ ally, bridge builder) joins for a series of episodes. In this episode, Andy talks about “the shame train” during his youth including:
*Porn, substance use, and working with his church leaders
* Shame around the “addiction label”, restrictions (temple trips), and falsely seeing himself as a “terrible addict”
* How porn/substance use was more about self-medicating from the shame and trauma than a desire to displease God
* How his worth become dependent on church leaders
* All the people who helped him along the way
Andy then talks about his road to be an LGBTQ ally:
* Started in high school in Iowa with proximity to queer people
* Felt he had to choose the Church over queer people
* Powerful post-mission experience giving a blessing to a queer student at BYU-I
* Fully taking on the ally role following the pulse nightclub shooting
* Staying in the church as an ally
* What led him to eventually leave the Church
Andy also talks about why he isn’t trying to get other people to leave the Church—but trying to build bridges of understanding. In the next episode, will talk about his mixed-faith marriage (Andy’s wife is active LDS) and how they have a beautiful/supportive marriage—including Andy attending church.
Thank you, my friend Andy, for being on the podcast and your great heart and clinical skills to help heal others and bring us together as the same human family. You are a good man and friend.
Links:
Psychology today:
www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/andy-newman-gilbert-az/974441
IG: www.instagram.com/andynewmanlpc/
TikTok:
www.tiktok.com/@deconstruction_therapy
Episode 833: Isaac Durfey, Black/Gay Latter-day Saint, Super Brave
Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler
1 hour 14 minutes 14 seconds
5 months ago
Episode 833: Isaac Durfey, Black/Gay Latter-day Saint, Super Brave
*** This episode talks about suicide. If you are suicidal, please call/text/chat *988 ***
My friend Isaac Durfey (lives in Utah County, Age 34, Adopted, Active Latter-day Saint) bravely joins us to share his story which includes:
Being bullied
Being suicidal
Working through pornography
Convicted of being a sex offender and spending 4.5 years in prison
Leaving prison—what he learned, why he isn’t going back, finding hope
Accepting he is gay—but doesn’t define him
Talented musician
Great/supportive parents
Role of friends to help him feel he is loved and needed
Great YSA Wards
Hopes for his future including the Melchizedek Priesthood and Temple Endowment
Thank you, Isaac, for your courage to come on the podcast and share your story—stories like yours help others find hope. Thanks for helping all understand our Heavenly Parents love all of us and how the Gospel of Jesus Christ gives hope, heals and helps us move forward. You are a good man.
Links:
Isaac on Instagram: @durfsmurf25
Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler
*Note: This episode is about my goal to reduce the tension between those who stay in the Church and those who leave**
My friend Andy Newman (married father of three, Ex-Mormon, therapist, LGBTQ ally, bridge builder) joins for a series of episodes. In this episode, Andy talks about “the shame train” during his youth including:
*Porn, substance use, and working with his church leaders
* Shame around the “addiction label”, restrictions (temple trips), and falsely seeing himself as a “terrible addict”
* How porn/substance use was more about self-medicating from the shame and trauma than a desire to displease God
* How his worth become dependent on church leaders
* All the people who helped him along the way
Andy then talks about his road to be an LGBTQ ally:
* Started in high school in Iowa with proximity to queer people
* Felt he had to choose the Church over queer people
* Powerful post-mission experience giving a blessing to a queer student at BYU-I
* Fully taking on the ally role following the pulse nightclub shooting
* Staying in the church as an ally
* What led him to eventually leave the Church
Andy also talks about why he isn’t trying to get other people to leave the Church—but trying to build bridges of understanding. In the next episode, will talk about his mixed-faith marriage (Andy’s wife is active LDS) and how they have a beautiful/supportive marriage—including Andy attending church.
Thank you, my friend Andy, for being on the podcast and your great heart and clinical skills to help heal others and bring us together as the same human family. You are a good man and friend.
Links:
Psychology today:
www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/andy-newman-gilbert-az/974441
IG: www.instagram.com/andynewmanlpc/
TikTok:
www.tiktok.com/@deconstruction_therapy
