“If nothing changes, nothing changes. I just kept walking and saying that to myself. We were stuck in a vortex and something had to shift.” – Andrea Barr
In this honest and emotionally grounded conversation, career coach and speaker Andrea Barr joins Fiona to share the deeply personal story behind her professional pivot. After her husband faced a major heart surgery and unexpected complications, Andrea found herself navigating two months of daily hospital visits, uncertainty, and fear, all while seven months pregnant.
As she moved through postpartum, more medical challenges followed. These experiences forced Andrea to look at how much she had been holding — emotionally, logistically and energetically — and sparked a fundamental shift in how she approaches life, work, parenting and partnership.
This episode is for anyone who feels like they are doing all the right things on the outside but still feel like something is off inside. Together, Andrea and Fiona explore what the invisible load really includes, how to bring more awareness and ownership into partnership, and how to plan in ways that protect your capacity instead of draining it.
Today on Limitless:
- How real change begins : Andrea shares how crisis interrupted her default patterns and forced her to question what she was holding and why. We explore how change often begins in disruption, and what it takes to choose differently when control is no longer an option.
- What the invisible load really looks like - It is not just tasks. It is the emotional labor of remembering, anticipating, tracking and caring, often silently. Andrea shares how noticing what she was still holding, even after delegating, helped her and her partner begin to truly share the load.
- The myth of “handled” - What happens when you have done all the right things — coaching, systems, batch cooking — and still hit a wall.
- True partnership vs task splitting - Why delegation is not the same as shared ownership, and how Andrea and her partner found a new rhythm through trial and error.
- Planning as a nervous system tool - How a simple weekly check-in became a way to reduce stress, prevent resentment and make life feel more doable.
- Agency in powerless moments - How choosing small next steps, like switching doctors or changing care, helped Andrea feel more supported in a time of deep uncertainty.
Show Resources
Podcast: Listen to Andrea’s Podcast episode on the Fair Play Method with Valerie Recore: Valerie Recore on redistributing the household load
Book and Cards: Fair Play by Eve Rodsky
Book: A Beautiful Constraint by Adam Morgan and Mark Barden
Connect with Andrea Barr:
Website: www.andreabarr.com
Podcast: All Figured Out with Andrea Barr
Instagram: @allfiguredoutandrea
Connect with Fiona Walsh:
Coaching: Work with me
Instagram: @fionawalshcoaching
Email: fiona@fionawalshconsulting.com
