Do labels in non-monogamy give you clarity—or do they feel like a box you don’t want to fit into?
Labels in non-monogamy—love them or hate them, they’re everywhere. For some people, labels bring clarity and a sense of belonging. For others, they feel restrictive or unnecessary. The truth? Whether labels are important is a personal choice.
In this short but powerful episode from our Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook group archives (saved before Facebook removed all group livestreams), we explore the role of labels in consensual non-monogamy and ask: What’s right for me?
We start with the basics:✅ What do labels actually mean, and why do some people use them?✅ Introducing GSERD—Gender, Sexual, Erotic, Relational Diversity—as one way of identifying yourself.✅ A high-level overview of Jessica Fern’s Styles of Non-Monogamy diagram, which maps different relationship styles onto quadrants of high-to-low sexual and emotional exclusivity—and how you can use it to explore what feels right for you. (For a deeper dive into these styles, check out S1, Episode 7: How We Love: What Style of Non-Monogamy is Right for Me? episode.)
From there, we talk about:✅ Deciding what labels (if any) align with your values and relationships✅ What you’d like your partners to call you—whether that’s boyfriend, girlfriend, boo, FWB, or something entirely your own
✨ If you haven’t already, download our free worksheet—What Style of Consensual Non-Monogamy is Right for Me?—which includes Jessica Fern’s diagram and reflection prompts to help you map out your own place on the spectrum. Get it here: https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/cnmstyle
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