This life isn't just about GOING through trials—it's about GROWING through them. This inspiring book will teach you how to do just that.
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OUTLINE
Is There No Other Way? is a religious book by Emily Adams published in 2020
Overview of the Book
- The author has firsthand experience with grief (having suffered the death of one of her identical twin boys), and she also interviewed about 50 other women about their trials
How the Atonement Can Help You Grieve
- "There is nothing you have experienced . . . that [Jesus Christ] does not also know and recognize."
- "He’s not waiting for us to be perfect. Perfect people don’t need a Savior. He came to save his people in their imperfections. He is the Lord of the living, and the living make mistakes. He’s not embarrassed by us, angry at us, or shocked. He wants us in our brokenness, in our unhappiness, in our guilt, and in our grief."
Don't Feel Ashamed for Your Sorrow
- The Savior, who was perfect, is "a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief," which is evidence that there is nothing wrong with sorrow and grief
- "Does perfection mean not letting words and experiences hurt us? Or does it just mean not permitting them to dull our faith and distance us from our Heavenly Father?"
Don't Compare Grief
- "Someone who drowns in 6 feet of water is just as dead as someone who drowns in 20 feet of water. Stop comparing traumas, and stop belittling yours or anyone else’s traumas because it wasn’t 'as bad' as someone else’s. This isn’t a competition, we all deserve support and recovery."
- Don't use the phrase "at least" when trying to comfort someone ("At least your baby died before you could make memories with him since that would be so much harder")
- Instead, just say, "I'm sorry. I love you. What can I do for you?"
Write a Headline for Your Hardship
- "Woman's Husband Has Terrible Accident that Ruins Their Life" vs. "Young Couple Remains Joyful Despite Husband's Terrible Accident"
- Whatever your headline is (how you feel about the trial), you begin to look for evidence to support it, so try to choose an optimistic one instead of a pessimistic one
Talk About It
- Never underestimate the healing power of talking and the priceless gift of listening
Grow Through Grief
- A progression from Victim to Survivor to Contributor
- A victim asks "Why me?" A survivor asks "Now what?" And a contributor confidently states "Now me," as in now it's my turn to help others.
Takeaways
- 1. Think about a trial that you're going through right now and choose a headline that represents how you'd like to handle it.
- 2. Imagine yourself in five years telling someone about your current trial, what you learned from it, and what helped you get through it.