Tom Lucy is the kind of guy one finds impossible to dislike. He’s kind, charming, FUNNY, engaging, and has two first names. He has a solid group of friends, a loving family, and has a good head on his shoulders. He’s career-oriented. A thinker. Driven. He’s 23.
The first time we met, we began our conversation by examining our mutual, ten year separated, existential crises. Our second encounter was at a birthday dinner where I watched him concoct a last-minute birthday speech, which was perfectly (and comedically) executed. The third time we sat across one another and I badgered the poor guy for an hour on comedy and the inner-workings of his field, which led us to discuss the potential of sitting down to record the very podcast you’re about to hear. He said yes. I followed up…and, here we are.
We spoke of all the things I like best: Vulnerability, Work Ethic, Family Dynamics, Relationship’s pitfalls and joys, and Wake Up calls. For 23, the dude has a lot to share without an ounce of judgement or righteousness. I’ll let you decide for yourself. Oh, and don’t bother calling him Tom. It’s Tom Lucy.
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Tom Lucy is the kind of guy one finds impossible to dislike. He’s kind, charming, FUNNY, engaging, and has two first names. He has a solid group of friends, a loving family, and has a good head on his shoulders. He’s career-oriented. A thinker. Driven. He’s 23.
The first time we met, we began our conversation by examining our mutual, ten year separated, existential crises. Our second encounter was at a birthday dinner where I watched him concoct a last-minute birthday speech, which was perfectly (and comedically) executed. The third time we sat across one another and I badgered the poor guy for an hour on comedy and the inner-workings of his field, which led us to discuss the potential of sitting down to record the very podcast you’re about to hear. He said yes. I followed up…and, here we are.
We spoke of all the things I like best: Vulnerability, Work Ethic, Family Dynamics, Relationship’s pitfalls and joys, and Wake Up calls. For 23, the dude has a lot to share without an ounce of judgement or righteousness. I’ll let you decide for yourself. Oh, and don’t bother calling him Tom. It’s Tom Lucy.
27. DAN DOTY | On EQ, Finding Oneself + One’s Purpose, the Physics of Human Connection + Building EVRYMAN
IN THE UNKNOWN with Alyonka
1 hour 18 minutes 56 seconds
7 years ago
27. DAN DOTY | On EQ, Finding Oneself + One’s Purpose, the Physics of Human Connection + Building EVRYMAN
This connection is another one of those timing is everything and patience is a virtue. I first heard of Dan Doty indirectly via (once again) Jesse Israel, when mentioning a men’s retreat he’d attended called EVRYMAN. At first, I was connected to it’s co-founder, Sascha Lewis, with whom I met in person last fall. I made a note in my notebook that I’d like to continue this conversation with a potential collaboration in mind. Almost a year later, I attended a MediClub in Brooklyn. There I was grouped with four strangers to discuss a prompted topic. I exchanged contacts with one of the men after the event. We met for coffee. He mentioned EVRYMAN and suggested I connect with the Founder. An email was sent and a week later I was on a call with Dan Doty.
We had things in common. Dan used to work as a producer, as had I. He had a love for Montana, as did I from my work there with VICE. But mostly we connected on the human condition and the need for the type of connection and conversation that he was providing for men. He expanded on EVRYMAN and what the retreat entails. He spoke of the men he was meeting. He made mention that he was looking to work with women as well. I knew then that this was my people. That was conversation #1.
After a few weeks processing our conversation, I sent a follow up email asking Dan if he’d be interested in a podcast conversation. He immediately said yes. We set up a time and here’s the result of this timeline of events.
The truth of the matter is this (as it always is): timing is everything. When Jesse first mentioned EVRYMAN, I had just started my IN THE UNKNOWN Workshops. I was not yet ready to properly comprehend and process the context of this podcast because I hadn’t yet done the work with others. Now, with nearly 60 Workshops under my belt, I had the experience and the hours to pull from my personal experiences in workshop, and to use my own personal journey as an example to relate. The patience it takes to get to this place is immense, however, when we exercise it and trust the process of time, we do not miss the connection when it arises, even if it comes months later.
What I know is that Dan is a Warrior, someone on a journey to create space for all to reconnect with self and others. His approach is a bit different than mine and this could be due to his stronger foundation of self-confidence. That said, he too fears common Unknowns to mine, and articulates them most vulnerably with an immense strength, kindness and compassion.
This is a listen for EVRYMAN looking to change their life. For every woman looking to better understand her man. And for anyone looking for self-betterment and a new way to live their life. I suggest STRONGLY that if you like what you hear you share: men, attend this retreat // women, suggest it to your men. This is a win for all.
Thank you Dan for your heart + your mind. Friend (you know who you are) for the connect. And J for the planting of the seed.
IN THE UNKNOWN with Alyonka
Tom Lucy is the kind of guy one finds impossible to dislike. He’s kind, charming, FUNNY, engaging, and has two first names. He has a solid group of friends, a loving family, and has a good head on his shoulders. He’s career-oriented. A thinker. Driven. He’s 23.
The first time we met, we began our conversation by examining our mutual, ten year separated, existential crises. Our second encounter was at a birthday dinner where I watched him concoct a last-minute birthday speech, which was perfectly (and comedically) executed. The third time we sat across one another and I badgered the poor guy for an hour on comedy and the inner-workings of his field, which led us to discuss the potential of sitting down to record the very podcast you’re about to hear. He said yes. I followed up…and, here we are.
We spoke of all the things I like best: Vulnerability, Work Ethic, Family Dynamics, Relationship’s pitfalls and joys, and Wake Up calls. For 23, the dude has a lot to share without an ounce of judgement or righteousness. I’ll let you decide for yourself. Oh, and don’t bother calling him Tom. It’s Tom Lucy.
